Every week I count backwards from ten. I know, I’m kind of a big deal. Usually these countdowns have a theme like which phrases really grind my gears (“grind my gears” should be mentioned) or how I’m still effing sober, despite the fact that I could really go for a dirty martini right now.

I know it’s early, stop judging.

This week, in light of the ever-riveting Emmys, I’ve decided to countdown the ten primetime ladies that I wish I could be in real life. Most of them are from currently aired shows, but of course I had to let some of my canceled favorites slip by.

10. Cuddy – House
Who wouldn’t love to work with the ever lovable Dr. House? Cuddy is a complete non-pushover HBIC (look it up) who always looks fierce. And her hair is never out of place! Unlike that awful Cameron. Barf.

9. Lucille Bluth – Arrested Development
Why did this show get canceled? Why? I hope one day to be Lucille when I’m a “Gangy,” dirty martini in hand and Chanel skirt suits never out of place. Hopefully I’ll be slightly less mentally damaging to my family, though. Slightly.

8. Heidi Klum – Project Runway
The only non-fictional character on the list. This one’s a no brainer. Except I’m not sure how I’d go home to Seal every night.

7. Pam – The Office
I’m not a huge Pam fan. In fact, I was totally Team Karen while she was on the show. But, she has Jim Halpert (John Krasinski) and that’s all I need. Read More »

While flipping through the channels last night during primetime, I discovered the real reason why our favorite shows go off the air during the summer: to make way for the sh*tshow that is summer television, which leaves us begging for The Office and House come September.

It’s the perfect advertising strategy: cut off the supply of good shows, and the viewers will demand that the season premiere of Grey’s Anatomy be moved up several weeks. But it’s absolute torture for the rest of us.

That is not to say all summer TV is bad. True Blood and Mad Men are perhaps two of the greatest shows on television, period, despite the fact that they premiere during the summer. But take a look the other night’s TV listings, and you’ll want to cringe along with me: America’s Got Talent, Big Brother, More To Love? Nothing even halfway decent to watch! Read More »

Lately, it feels as if I’m in a Samuel Beckett play. With four weeks to go until I graduate from high school and hardly anything worthwhile to do, I find myself stuck in a waiting game. My school days are drawn-out and boring as anything; the highlights of my days are the art house films we’re watching in French and the various incarnations of dodgeball my gym teacher keeps thinking up. I keep looking at the calendar each day, and although my parents tell me the weeks will fly by quickly, graduation could not be farther away in my mind. And not to mention freshman move-in day, which seems like light years away.

I have, however, found a few things to keep me occupied until graduation. It’s not much, but at least it’s preventing me from losing my mind from anxious waiting: Read More »

We’re back with another edition of G.W.W.E. (Guys We Wanna Eff)!  This week, kick back and relax with a big cup of  Kal Penn.

Not many men can put a gun to their heads one day and accept a highly prestigious federal job the next, but leave it to Kal Penn to pull it off. Earlier this week, the scrumptious House star had fans in a tizzy when they tuned in to discover his character, Dr. Lawrence Kutner, had committed suicide. Turns out, Penn had his character on the popular show killed off so that he could accept a job as President Obama’s Associate Director of the White House Office of Public Liaison! With the economy being what it is, for anyone to make a career leap at this time is impressive, but the (literally) show-stopping switch by Kal is infinitely effable. Read More »

There is nothing better than a Sunday evening with french fries, Franzia and fashion. The Emmy Awards are on right now and they are…meh. The opening scene sorta blew (except for Heidi Klum’s sparkly unitard…that she looked HOT in), the rest is a bit boring, and my Franzia hangover is already kicking in.

But the red carpet fashion was some of the best I’ve seen in years. Seriously, I can’t even think of one dress that I didn’t totally love. Well, maybe one, but that is for a whole other post.

As I walked past a mirror on my way to the bathroom and caught my reflection – sorority butt pants, a stained t-shirt and super greasy hair – I couldn’t help but imagine what I would look like in any of the following gowns.

Not that I will ever walk a red carpet…or get to wear a Nanette Lepore gown…or drink any wine that doesn’t come in a box, but a girl can dream.

Click on the image to get a full look at the gowns and find out why we fell head over Louboutin-heels in love. Read More »

Drum roll please…

It’s the news with Kandy Korrespondent! (wild applause) anyways:

The California Supreme Court has overturned the state’s same-sex marriage ban by a vote of 3-4 stating that gay unions must be given the “respect and dignity of marriage” and that same-sex couples should be permitted to wed. Governor Schwartzenagger said on Thursday that he will respect the court’s ruling. Meanwhile, Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa told reporters that he will gladly officiate at same-sex weddings.

This ruling is the first to apply arguments typically used with regards to the protection of gender and racial rights to the issue of same-sex marriage.

In Other News: Read More »

After what felt like zillions of months of waiting, there was finally a new episode of House this week. And I’m sorry to say that if you missed it… well, you didn’t miss much. It didn’t totally suck, but the writers must have been warming up before they eased into the really good stuff. Here’s a recap:

The patient du jour was a dude who collapsed during a protest and who appeared to have no major symptoms other than occasional fainting spells. House, however, usurped the patient with the theory that his niceness (yes, NICENESS) was a symptom of a more serious illness.

After a bunch of tests, the team found out that the guy had neurosyphilis and that the condition was supposedly affecting his brain. Kutner also tested a vial of “House’s” blood that he found lying around and discovered that House had syphilis. Long story short: House planted the blood so he could pretend to get nicer with treatment and make the team believe that his initial opinion of niceness being a defect was correct. Read More »

At today’s presidential press conference President Bush urged the House to pass the Terrorist Surveillance Bill (FISA) which will allow surveillance of foreigners without a warrant. The bill’s progress has been stalled due to the controversial clause giving immunity to phone companies from wiretapping-related lawsuits.

When asked about the concerns of the American people, President Bush fell back upon his stand-by argument–The Enemy! stating:

“How can you listen to the enemy if the phone companies won’t participate with you” for fear of lawsuits? He went on to state that companies have a duty to their shareholders.

Oh right…the shareholders. Of course their financial protection is more important than the Presidential Oath.

The President also made it clear he will hold firm to his current foreign policy trajectory.

In regards to Raul Castro, President Bush made it clear that despite the power shift in Cuba, he will not meet with the new leader nor will he consider changing the embargo.

According to the President, meeting with the new leader of Cuba will detract from the power of the current American position:

“Sitting down at the table… lends the status of the office and the status of our country to him, he [Raul Castro] gains a lot from it…” Read More »

In a complete anomaly of the writers’ strike, House was a new episode this Tuesday and will be new AGAIN (!) next week.

Aside from the weird feeling I got from watching a Christmas-themed episode when it wasn’t actually Christmastime, I thoroughly enjoyed watching House get his Scrooge on.

Since no one actually watches the episodes for the “medical mysteries” that make up the plotlines, I’m going to jump right in to making commentary about the new medical team.

Taub: It’s still kind of an enigma to me why this dude is on the show, to be honest. As an actor, he doesn’t impress me much, and as a character, he impresses me even less. I mean, what is his purpose? What is House going to do with a middle-aged plastic surgeon? My guess is he’ll develop some kind of illicit relationship with Thirteen. Read More »

Days as a Freshman: 83

Mood: Totally unable to concentrate

The November wind pushed itself under my scarf, biting at the skin on my neck. I pulled my jacket collar up as high as it would go, wishing I had worn a heavier sweater.

Coming from Maine, you’d think I’d be better prepared each time winter touched down, but every year it caught me off guard, snaking through my window and startling me with it’s freezing nights and frozen mornings. Some people were built to appreciate winter. I was not one of those people.

Crashing through piles of leaves, I made my way through the quad, the campus still asleep at 10 AM on a Saturday. Part of me wished I was still asleep. Still warm under my comforter instead of rushing with wet hair toward the Soccer House, a place I had no desire to even look at, let alone spend hours studying in.

Sasha had asked me to come over that night at the coffee house, pleading with me to help him with the chemistry problems he had missed going over with Daniel B. My initial reaction had been to make up an excuse; to come up with anything to keep me away from sitting alone in the Soccer House with Sasha, but standing in front of him, feeling his gaze and the extra pressure of his tall, silent friend, I ended up smiling and saying sure. Sure I’ll help. Sure I’ll do whatever you ask. I’m Grace, the pushover loser. Read More »