WHO TELLS A 19-YEAR-OLD GIRL THAT HER STEP-DAD IS CHEATING ON HER MOM WHO IS SICK WITH CANCER (or at least thinks she is) WHILE GRABBING HER COAT FROM THE COAT CHECK GUY???

OK, now that I got that off my chest, I’m feeling a little better. But really, what is wrong with (fictional) people? Was it so urgent, random beautiful woman from downstairs, that you couldn’t wait until you got home – to the building you both live in – to tell Lily yourself? And is it even true? Could it be that this woman is just head over heels for Rufus and wants him and his waffle iron for herself?  Between all his breakfast-making and conniving to keep the Doc out of Lily’s life, when would he have the time for some extra-marital nookie?

And, let’s not forget that Lily already sorta knew something was happening between these two before. But what that “something” was, we don’t know for sure. Remember Scarf-Gate 2009? That wool Burberry number was what evened the score earlier in the year when Rufus was all, “Why you lying to me, Lily?” and Lily was all, “Hey, I’m gonna leave this scarf on your table without saying anything so you know that I know and we can move on.”

But now stupid Serena (and her stupid gorgeous makeup and those stupid ridiculous earrings and that stupid, stupid insanely beautiful dress) is involved and we all know how that’s gonna go. (And if you don’t, here’s a rundwon: she’s going to get deep into the mess without really knowing the truth, she’s going to hurt a lot of people, probably break up the family, but then she’s going to apologize to everyone and it will all be OK. Oh, and then she’s going to have hot, steamy sex [potentially involving things found in the fridge] with Nate.)

Can’t wait to see how that all goes down. Pause. Not.

What I am excited for, though, is the return of the old Blair Waldorf. I had a couple tears in my eyes when we found out Chuck had applied to Columbia for her. Not only am I ready for my favorite witch to get out of the East Village and start breaking bitches down on the UWS, but the fact that Chuck applied there for her? Swoon. That’s love. For real, I applied there back in the day and anyone who is willing to do that for someone else deserves a medal of honor. That ish was ridonk.

Sigh, what I would give to be on of Chuck’s random girls for the night…..

Woops. Back on track.

Things also happened between Dan and Vanessa. I only noticed because while these (boring) things were happening, Vanessa was wearing an awesome sequin cardigan and I was drooling onto my remote. I watched closely, hoping she might disclose where said cardigan came from, but instead I followed some fight about internships and writing courses and blah, blah, blah. The funny thing is, the Dan and Vanessa situation is the only one on the show that would really hold up in the real world. It’s real drama, something we can all identify with, and it’s boring me to tears. Maybe V leaving for three months will spice things up a bit?

Or MAYBE Vanessa will send Jenny instead (I’m sure CNN and Haiti need some 17-year-old girl who can sew) and she and her waist-long hair and super wet looking lips will be out of our lives forever!!

Wishful thinking?
Probably, but we’ll find out the fate of all of our favorite UES-ers in the season finale next week. Here’s hoping Jenny’s drug dealing ways save her family…

Yesterday was the best day ever.

First, my Communications teacher decided to show Gossip Girl in our class and then the CW broadcast a fabulous new episode and finally developed the “Rufus Humphrey’s kid is hiding out in New York” plot line.  Oh, and I got to see Dan Humphrey do a Walk of Shame.

Yay, life.

Ok, so yeah, I was jumping up and down when Scott was finally ready to admit who he was. And then the moment actually happened – or didn’t. Turns out that Scott kid is more Humphrey than I thought – he didn’t have the balls to come out and tell the Humphrey-clan his true identity. The only one who knows right now is Vanessa, and, let’s be real, that girl can’t keep her mouth shut for an entire subway ride to Brooklyn. (Disclaimer: I really don’t like Vanessa and will take every excuse to bash her.)  As soon as she learns the smallest of details, she has to go spilling it to everyone and poor Scott’s life is going to be turned up-side-down.

Does that mean that hottie will be back for more episodes? We can only hope.

But all that Humphrey drama didn’t ruin the entire 60-minutes for me. In fact, Georgina saved it. How much do you love  that the bitch in Georgina Sparks is finally back? And how much does it skeeve you out that she’s become so…creepy?  Did anyone else notice a picture-perfect version of her and Dan on her shiny paper-thin MacBook Air? I know most of her motivation in life comes from getting back at Blair, but I think this love/obsession for Dan is real. And really creepy. We can all bet that Dan is going to pay for his wanting to keep-things-casual attitude towards her; once you’re in bed with Georgina Sparks, you are probably going to have to crawl your way out.

Personally, I love the whole manipulative side to her.  The Jesus lover was freaking me out, the nice girl act was just boring and this “I heart Dan” thing is weird.  This drama is much more my style and I can’t wait to see more of that. Bring out the claws, woman.

In the business world of New York, Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf bid on a photo – Blair to climb up in the New York social world, and Chuck to impress his future business partners.  Poor B still doesn’t have any friends at school, but apparently Chuck is buying a hotel now, so at least she’ll have her pick of rooms when she wants to take out her frustrations on a certain Bass.  That’s gotta make the girl feel better, right? I know when my super rich boyfriend bought a hotel….wait. No I don’t.

And for those who are also too cool for school, Serena van Der Woodsen is playing couple with Carter Basin…who is much less cute now that he is broke.  But she did date Dan Humphrey, so maybe she likes saving those helpless boys.

Things to look forward to: Finding out why Bree Buckley hates Carter Basin so much.  I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume it has something to do with money. Doesn’t it always?  Also to look forward to:  shirtless Nate Archibald. Where was he (and those pecks) this episode?

Highlight of the show: Georgina making her way to Boston to mess with Scott. Just because he’s in a different area code doesn’t mean Georgina can’t get her claws into him.

Until next week…
You know you love them.

XOXO.
GGR
(Gossip Girl Recapper)

"I'm sorry I tried to ruin your life to get onto Page 6"

After a two-week hiatus (WTF, CW?) Gossip Girl returned last night. I don’t know if I can handle any more breaks, but OMG, was it worth the wait!  As the weather changes outside, so are our friends from the Upper East Side.

First, let me start by saying how happy I was to see Cyrus again!  That little bald nugget of a stepdad is one of those gems (like Dorota) that make Gossip Girl sparkle.  Especially since Dorota was off falling in love and Vanessa was MIA, too!   She finally gets a good storyline, AND a backbone, and suddenly she’s nowhere to be seen. Was that delicious plotline with her and Chuck just a tease? WAS IT?

And with Rufus deciding to close down the art gallery, where is she gonna brew her coffee? What on earth is going to happen to V?

Also, can I just say that I am secretly really happy that the economy is affecting GG, though a bit peeved that it was the Humphrey’s that got crapped on. I’m pretty sure there are plenty of wealthy people out there who were hit hard in this recession, so why is it the “poor” Brooklyn family that gets it? And, being that they are in a bit of financial ruin, why would Rufus care about Dan getting a job? And why doesn’t my dad feel that way? But secretly Dan did get a job, and how cute did he look in that uniform?  Presh.

And what a coincidence that everyone ended up at the same Seder dinner.  Thank god they did because it was the one of the funniest meals I have ever witnessed (and I’ve seen some doozies).  Though it seemed nobody was ready to sit through the typical seven-hour meal, it was fun to watch Dan be Eleanor’s bitch boy and nice to see S and Lonely Boy teaming up, since their chemistry is so cute.  But I don’t know how I feel about this Gabriel character…  I fell in love with his hunkiness, but what are he and Poppy cooking up? Did Serena and him really get married, and he’s just playing it off, or is that just my imagination running wild? (GG tends to do that to me.)

Of course, there was some drama away from the seder too. Mostly involving Blair and Nate. I was ready to throw my remote at the TV when B was ready to sacrifice her boyfriend’s future for a picture in the style pages. (And might I add – Nate looks really good when he’s standing up for himself. Mmmmm.) Really, Blair? Have you learned nothing from all your scheming? But then, in true GG form, there was a twist, both Blair and Nate (thanks to Chuck) had an Aha Moment and they ended up in an adorable embrace before the episode ended.

Last night’s episode was on of the best in a long time (and not just because it’s been 2 weeks since the last one). It was funny, it was dramatic, and it is totally opening up a lot of doors for next week. I just can’t wait for the return of my favorite villain, Georgina. I hate her so much that I can’t help but love her!

So what did you all think of the show?