August has GOT to be one of the best months out there for dudes. And I’m just going off of the subtitles on the cover of this month’s Maxim magazine. Between Shark Week, hot and humid Skype sex, free beer and a half naked chick on a beach – I don’t know what else any guy really needs (aside for maybe a napkin and a cigarette – hehe). But I’m sure Maxim thinks they know, so let’s get digging.

After paging through the awkward ‘Maxim Office Assistant’ photos (think, girl spread-eagle cartwheel past the printer) and a page dedicated to large bicycles and office pranks, I landed across the lovely ‘Ask Maxim’ page. This month, I learned how fat you need to be to actually…explode. Maxim’s answer? Apparently someone’s stomach actually ruptured after eating 19 pounds of food in one sitting. I need to be careful the next time I order Taco Bell at 3 a.m.

This month’s ‘Woman With a Tool’ featured a leggy lady carrying around a weed whacker. This is unrealistic for two reasons. One, no lady in their right mind would weed whack with shorts on (do you have any idea how much that hurts!?) Two, any guy in their right mind is going to want more than a machine to do the whacking, if you catch my propane-powered drift. Read More »

While I love the Internet for giving us Facebook, AIM and the ninja way of downloading music without getting caught, there are still some things about going online and the web that I could do without. I’ve noticed that since I’ve been going on the web 24/7 for work and internships, I’ve been getting angry.

Really angry.

And here are just 5 of the things that make my want to throw something. Like my Macbook. But I stop myself, because it’s not her fault. And she’s just so pretty and shiny and wonderful… Well, when that rainbow beachball pinwheel thing doesn’t pop up every 3 minutes.

1. Those who don’t properly utilize the BCC
Come on, people. BCC was invented for a reason and that reason was to eliminate the firestorm of emails that comes from those morons who can’t tell the difference between “reply” and “reply to all.” Don’t risk getting 150 emails (50% of which are people complaining about those who reply to all) in response to your “Sunday Funday” email invitation and just use the BCC. PLEASE.

2. Those who don’t know the difference between “Reply” and “Reply to all”
See above. You’re making lots of enemies, reply-to-all-ers. Watch your back. Read More »

Remember when you started college and you got a bunch of cool new stuff? Everything was shiny and new and you were off on a great adventure. A lot has changed since then. Now you’re all disillusioned by jerky professors and “real world” problems. Oh, and your laptop is an antique.

Many of you are thisclose to the end of your college days [weep], which means it’s time to upgrade your shiz for the next phase of your life. But what do you need? And which products are the best?

Look no further; I’m here for your graduating shopping needs. I can’t teach you how to survive out there – because I’m a few credits away from that awful place – but I can help you with that graduation wish list to hand off to the parentals.

Please hold your applause until the end. Read More »

Let’s be honest – we all like to get some on a fairly regular basis. But what’s a girl to do when the one she wants it from is a little too far away? It’s not like you can call up a guy who lives four hours away, tell him you’re horny, and expect him to deliver. You can bet that you probably would have taken care of it before he even got on the freeway. Thus, I decided to compile a little list of quirky ways to tide you and your guy over until you see each other in the flesh.

Phone Sex: This is the classic way to get your jollies when away from your lover. The upside? Feeling a little more desirable than just flying solo. The downside? Having friends and/or hear your various noises permeate through the walls. Could provide for a veryyy awkward conversation soon after.

Webcam Fun: With the invention of iChat and Skype, face-to-face action is becoming more popular than ever. However, be sure that if you do decide to have your own little “digital get down” that you lock your door. I can tell you (sadly, from personal experience), it is quite embarrassing to have your friend walk in on you half naked playing online strip chess with your boyfriend. Whoooppss. Read More »

The Long Distance Relationship.

It sucks, but I keep telling myself that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

I’ve been in an on and off relationship with this guy for eight years. Yes, we first started dating when I was about ten. That’s a very long time, and we’ve been through a lot, including six month periods of not talking at all. Times where I was depressed and mopey and times where I was rebellious and happy.

He’s my best friend, my love, and the one I’m pretty confident I will be with for the rest of my life. Well, we got back together, again, and now my boyfriend has moved across the country. Yet another hurdle to overcome.

Instead of getting angry or upset, I decided to look at the situation in a positive light. I could go visit for a few weeks, and he would be home for holidays. It can’t be that bad. In fact, I just returned home from a two and a half week visit with him, and it was the most amazing trip I’ve ever had. That vacation definitely solidified everything I’ve felt about him for so long. Yes, LDRs are difficult, but they can be done. If you are willing to work through it like we are, it will be worth it in the end.

But it will be work, so here a few things to keep in mind when you and your man go long distance: Read More »