Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. I’m sure you’ve heard this phrase and a million others about how different men and women are. There are so many differences that we rely on our favorite dudes to help us analyze boy situations and constantly debate the difference between the sexes in terms of love, sex and relationships. But the differences don’t just stop there. According to new research, men and women also differ in how they indulge their sexual curiosity.

Ogi Ogas and Sam Gaddam have been analyzing billions of web searches and found that women are more likely to seek out character-driven stories rather than explicitly visual scenes of sexual activity. Unlike men who need nothing more than a short porn clip (or a hot girl modeling a bra in a Victoria’s Secret catalog) to get aroused, women require more of a story – and an emotional connection – to be stimulated. Proof: women account for 90 percent of sales for the romance novel industry but only two percent of porn site subscriptions.

But why?

Based on the results of this study, it seems that our sexual feelings are closely associated with the idea of the happily ever after demonstrated in all of our favorite Disney movies and chick flicks. Sex is pleasurable on its own, yes, but even our adult fantasies require something more. We need a story, context, and the idea that there is something behind the physical act to really feel aroused. Pictures and videos don’t often provide that, so women seek it out in the written word.

Do these findings translate into the real world? In my mind, yes. If women, on their own, are seeking out more than just the physical images of sex to get turned on, maybe this is just another study that proves that sex really is more fulfilling for women when it’s with someone we know and love.

Another interesting thing to note: while men primarily watch porn alone (no surprises there!), there is a large community of women discussing and dissecting online stories, especially on fan fiction websites. Yes, even something as personal as erotica is a bonding experience for women. Although the fact that women discuss the stuff they’re reading should come as no surprise judging by the tradition of weekend gossip over Sunday brunch.

Remember the good ‘ole days when you could buy a porno and not feel so guilty because at least it had some plot line?  Well, that time is over.  Now you’re just a pervert.  The world’s strongest industry isn’t exempt from the economic downturn, after all.  The adult film industry is forgoing longer, plot-centric movies for simple, concept-based collections of scenes (think: MILFs, glasses, brunettes, etc.).

Apparently, I’m not the only one upset about this (and BOY, am I upset!…not really).  Some porn stars are mourning the loss of dialogue and any resemblance to a real acting job.  Now they’re delegated to scene after scene of hardcore sex.  But, who’s surprised?  It’s porn! People aren’t watching it for the suspense – they’re watching it for the sex. Even more, the internet is taking over all traditional visual media – Hulu, anyone?  If anything is over 10 minutes long, then most people move on to something shorter and more entertaining (read: more penetration, less time). Therefore, if porn movies are shot in segments, they can be easily broken down and disseminated throughout the internet more quickly.

But…but…what about the glory days? 

What will my friends and I do for a laugh when we’re wasted and relegated to the apartment because of rain/snow/inability to walk?  Without adult films continuing in the tradition of such classics like Edward Penishands (seriously – Google it) and Wet Dreams May Come, what are we left with?  Sex.  Just sex.  I guess that’s okay…but I sure am gonna miss the crazy plot twists, cheap props, and horrendous dialogue (“I’m here to fix your washer, maam.”) associated with the best plot-based porn movies.

In the meantime, I guess I’ll watch The Hills for the same effect (and, of course, Edward Penishands…again and again).

I remember the first time I slept at my ex’s apartment. He ran out to get some pizza and I asked if I could use his computer to check my email.

“Yeah, just don’t look at my browsing history, k?”

Right – because you can tell a girl that and expect her not to wonder why on earth you would make that request!

He wasn’t out of the room for 30 seconds before I did just that. And the first site on the list? MamaLovesC*ck.com.

For real.

It was at that moment that I began to wonder just how prominent porn was in guys’ lives. I mean, I always knew they looked at it, but how often? For how long? And why, especially when they have a girlfriend spending the freaking night?

I asked a close friend for the answers. What did I find out? More than I ever wanted to know.

It hurts enough to sever ties with someone who knew every intimate detail about you, but imagine those private moments, discussions and pictures becoming public knowledge at the hands of someone you loved.

Men.Style.com recently ran a story in its Details forum concerning the topic of revenge porn, defined by UrbanDictionary.com as “homemade porn uploaded by an ex-girlfriend or (usually) ex-boyfriend after particularly vicious breakup as a means of humiliating the ex.” While the writer, Richard Morgan, cautions against revenge porn lest anyone involved (usually the boyfriend) suffer legal consequences, the casual manner in which he describes revenge porn does not fully clarify just how damaging this growing trend can be.

An influx of lawsuits concerning variations of revenge porn (homemade sex tapes posted on internet porn forums, nude pictures uploaded to MySpace accounts, distribution of homemade DVD’s) has sparked interest and concern in law-makers, who feel that new laws should be established to regulate the final legal frontier: the Internet. Details questions the necessity of criminalizing revenge porn, ignoring the long reaching effects it could have on a victim and, therefore, trivializing the entire issue.

Revenge porn, argues Morgan, shouldn’t necessarily qualify as a crime because it simply serves as a sign of the times. It’s just the product of our self-obsessed, celebrity crazed, over-exposed and digitally adept generation: the 2008 equivalent of petty slander, right? Wrong. It is not, as the article put it, “the contemporary version of writing ‘Jenny gives good head’ on the bathroom wall.”

Chances are Jenny’s friends, family, boss, and professors are not going to happen upon the exact stall of the exact dive-bar where her drunk-ass ex managed to get his hands on some Jaeger and a Sharpie. That bathroom stall doesn’t say Jenny’s last name, and unless said ex has some scotch tape and a picture of her in his wallet, Jenny is faceless. Comparing scribbles above a urinal with the emotional damage, public embarrassment, and potentially career ruining effect of compromising someone’s online identity is completely inappropriate.

Revenge porn is just as–if not more– invasive, cruel and immoral as any other form of slander or libel and should be punished in exactly the same way. Of course the smartest way to avoid becoming a victim of revenge porn is to not do, make or say anything explicit with a partner, but that is slightly unrealistic, not to mention takes away a major perk of being in a relationship in the first place.

Having a partner who you know well, love and trust allows women to really open up and…let loose. Unfortunately, that blissful relationship doesn’t always last forever and sometimes there’s no telling what revenge will drive a person to do.

Think about this next time you pull out the digital camera in a moment of passion. Would you want your Facebook friends seein’ that?