Today’s world is filled with challenging, mundane tasks that are nearly impossible to do. Eating with chopsticks, making toast, holding your laptop, keeping books open… the list goes on and on. Up until today, I had no idea that innovative tools were available to help with these ridiculously hard and boring tasks, but after checking out what the desperate inventors of the world have to offer, I’ve now added at least 20 of these things to my birthday wishlist.

…Except not really. Sure, I could probably use pizza scissors or an umbrella that folds into a purse (because we all know how awkward it is to be the person with the big wet umbrella), and don’t even get me started on how awesome it would be to fall asleep in the mouth of a T-Rex every night, but come on. Flower-shaped egg molds? A plastic handle that hooks onto a soda can? Oh, and my personal favorite, the shark tea infuser, makes it look like a dead fish is floating on top of your drink.

Yes, they’re creative and some of them are pretty useful, but really? REALLY? We’ve gotten to the point where we need easy-to-use chopsticks and slings to hold our heavy (except really not that heavy) laptops? Wow.

I’m not going to lie to you, I’m disappointed. It’s almost 2011 and we’re not yet riding around on Hover Cars and spending our weekends in our moon condo. When I was a kid, 2011 felt like the future, a million years away — anything and everything seemed possible.

I was hoping by now it would be perfectly plausible to put a Christmas robot on my wish list and that we would all have Christmas Dinner out of vacuum packed space-food packages. But that seems to still be light years away. However in case any scientists are reading this (because I hear this website is quite popular in science labs world wide!), here are your future invention priorities.

(Note: I’ve been a good girl this year; I DESERVE THEM.)

Self-Styling Hair

In an average month, I probably manage to style my hair as I like it once. Then I go to sleep, rub my hair against the pillow as I attempt to get comfortable, and wake up looking like I’ve been electrocuted. How sweet would it be to wake up and your hair be ready to go? How much more productive could I be with my day? Or, more importantly, how much longer could I have in bed?

Refillable Cupboards

Imagine that. You reach for the last yogurt and POOF a whole new box appears. You’d never have to trawl through the cold and snow when you’re desperate for a new box of cookies ever again.

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Yonge & Dundas Intersection in Toronto after Team Canada Win

This week’s Weekly Ten, Why Canada Deserves Silver, stirred up quite the controversy yesterday. Seriously, I didn’t see this much hate on CollegeCandy since one writer expressed her disdain for Taylor Swift. And rightfully so. Yes it was meant to be a joke, but we in Canada aren’t entirely laughing with you.  While we know for a fact CollegeCandy loves their Canadian readers, and even has a few Canadian writers (myself included), this post pissed a lot of people off.

But instead of get angry and insult the intelligence of the writer, editor or Americans in general, I decided to take the high road and just show why Canada deserves more than just a gold medal in Olympic hockey. So here is my condensed version (there are way too many reasons for one post!) of all the reasons Canada rocks that they forgot to teach you in high school. Read More »

At last: all my social problems have been resolved. Gone, for me, are the days of shyness, the empty nights, the nagging sense that I and my lowly breasts do not have anything to offer the world. No – these days, I’m the most popular girl on campus, with a sparkle in my eye, a spring in my step, and a blood alcohol level that is always just high enough to keep me from operating heavy machinery. What brought on this miraculous change, you ask?

Why, it’s the Wine Rack, a bra stuffed with inflatable polyurethane cups to be filled with the liquor of one’s choice. To paraphrase the immortal Fergie, I’m going to get, get, get you drunk, get you love drunk off my hump(s). And I now have a spigot on my chest designed specifically for that purpose. Read More »

Going to the beach is a process. Sand and sun, snacks and toys…there’s a lot to carry and a lot to deal with.

I won’t lie, it has deterred me from even venturing to the shore sometimes, but no worries my friends. Our problems have been solved.

Our friends at toweldown.com have created what is possibly the single most useful beach accessory this side of sunscreen.

What is a Toweldown towel, you ask? Well, it’s a lot of things. It’s a backpack, purse and towel all-in-one. The best feature? The pouch on top that you can fill with sand to make a pillow. Genius! With plently of colors and designs to choose from you will definitely find one to match your new bikini. And with the affordable price, you better snag some for a few friends.

A Toweldown towel is one of those novel inventions that your friends will ask you about, and although it may take a few explanations (and probably a demonstration or two) it’ll be a must-have in no time. Read More »