I’m 10 days deep into a summer fling of the best kind.

Him: A good friend (we’ll call him Fred) I’ve had a thing for, for years. He just got back from studying abroad and the ocean air and warm weather treated him very well.

I kind of thought our first encounter in the bedroom was a one-time occurrence. A tipsy romp between the sheets that was very memorable, but a sexual outlier…that is until it happened again the next night.

And again two nights later.

To the untrained eye, nothing is different. No awkward conversations, no weirdness whatsoever and the sex is nothing short of mind blowing. So where’s the problem?

He is my best friend’s ex-boyfriend. Read More »

So, I know we’re already a few episodes into Season Four, but…who cares let’s talk about LOST.

We saw lots of things happen in this episode. The best things for me though, are all the increasingly ‘Giligan’s Island’ moments that the castaways are stumbling into. Oh, if only LOST had a laugh track…

First scene is between Ben and Locke. Locke’s got Ben locked up independent of Miles now, and he brings Ben some breakfast. Mmm. Eggs, my fave. Not even just any eggs- the last two eggs. Locke wants answers, Ben does the ‘Ben Thing’ to Locke, telling him that “he’s more LOST now than he ever was”. Mmmm.. incorporating the title, that’s some nice cheese to throw on those scrambled eggs, LOST.

Meanwhile, back at the old barracks… Kate and Claire are yucking it up, relaxin’ all cool being the hottest women in the barracks. It’s pretty satisfying to see them interract, because for the past season we didn’t get to see much of that. Claire was too busy bein’ a bitch to Charlie… Is it weird to anyone else that she hardly shed a tear over his death?!

So, Sawyer’s all up in Kate’s thing, “come stay with me, but you better not be pregnant” blahblahblah. Snooze. Don’t care about their romance. Not that I care about Kate’s romance with Jack either. I didn’t mind watching the mounting flirations between them in previous seasons, but they’ve just taken it all way too far. This is what they’re distracting us with, so they have more time to figure out why the hell time is so fucked up on the island, who Ben really is, and what’s been going on with Walt + Michael. Read More »

Like Sarah Silverman, Heidi Montag is a comedienne. She’s got to be, because there is really no other way to explain why she is desperately reaching for a music career and releasing her music video “Higher.”

I wasn’t going to watch it for fear of losing my lunch, but let me break it down for you: remember that Paris Hilton video for “Stars are Blind”? Yeah, this is way, way worse.

When I hit play, I expected to fight the urge to scratch at my eyes or duck for cover if that chin got too close, but 37 seconds of beach frolicking, overly engineered pop sounds and then Heidi’s breathy voice instead caused uncontrollable laughter.

I missed about 40 seconds of the video because I couldn’t stop laughing, but I didn’t miss much.

Because the whole freaking video is this girl and her saline sandbags in the bikini. When she’s not laying on her back or on all fours, she’s doing these weird “Fosse” moves with her gigantic hands and I know that Jack from “Will and Grace” would be all ‘oh, no, honey’ over it. Read More »