Tuffy Luv Sez: Stop That Snoop Shoop!!!

You know what you can do with your bleepbleep questions?! You can take your bleepbleep questions and shove them in…my inbox. TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com

Dear Tuffy Luv,

Oh, Tuffy, I really need your help.

I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year now. It hasn’t been a completely easy time and we’ve had to overcome a lot, but we’ve stayed strong. Every day, our relationship gets deeper and I find myself falling more and more in love with him.

All that being said, I’ve kind of become The Crazy Girlfriend. You name it, I do it. I check his phone after he leaves the room, I secretly log into his Facebook almost daily, I’ve gone through his room and the entire contents of his computer, I’ve read his MSN logs, I check his Internet browsing history and spend a huge amount of my time obsessing over his ex-girlfriend. The fact that he has slept with other girls drives me absolutely insane, almost to the point of physical illness. This is unbelievably hypocritical as I’ve been with others guys, too. But anytime I see or hear about his ex (who is sort of still part of our group of friends), I lose my cool completely. I just can’t get the idea of them together out of my head. He told me when we first started dating that they had never exchanged ‘I love yous’ but I found out through reading old Facebook messages that this isn’t true. This has made me even more jealous, possessive and CRAZY. I feel like this has given me some license to keep snooping and obsessing.

All of this is completely humiliating to me and I would have no idea what to do if he found out. I just want to stop! I know my boyfriend loves me and I love him, so why am I acting like this?

Love,
The Crazy Girlfriend Read More »


The 6 Signs You’re Not Over Your Ex

We’ve all done it.  We claim that we are the best of friends, but the truth is that we are all guilty.  We sit and listen to our friends complain about their breakups, lend a shoulder to cry on, and then offer consoling words:  “You can do so much better” or “he’s the one missing out, not you.”  The sob-fest concludes and what do we do?

We immediately call our other friends to vent about just how annoying it is that Jill still isn’t over Jack.  After all, their break up was three months ago!  Can’t she just get a grip?!  We vow to never act so desperate, and we wouldn’t of course, because our breakups happened around the same and we are so, totally over our ex.

But wait, are we really?  Before we throw Jill down the hill for holding on too long, maybe we should read the signs to see if we aren’t exactly “over” our ex’s either:

Read More »


Ask a Dude: Why’s He Talking to His Ex?

[Got a Dude itch you just can't scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Dear dude,

Problem: my boyfriend’s ex girlfriend texts him constantly. They were in a relationship for 2 years on and off in high school. I asked him to not talk to her and he didn’t for about 4 months. But she texted him consistently and he finally gave in and started talking to her. He said she really needed him for advice. I know this because I sometimes check his phone. Bad I know on my part but I had good reason to! Now he locks his phone and I’m worried he has something to hide. I know she still loves him; am I being paranoid? I’m in a new relationship and we have told each other we love each other already. We discussed this but I’m just not comfortable with the whole thing; should I be?

Sincerely,
Skeptical Read More »


Single. And Jealous

I have a best friend. You know the kind of friendship where you finish each other’s sentences, annoy people with your inside jokes, and get into way too much trouble together at parties? Yeah, we’re that kind of close. And I love her to death.

Right now this best friend is lucky enough to be at the start of what we can all tell is going to be a great relationship with one of the few guys who might be worthy of her. I am as excited about it as she is. After months of squealing with her and analyzing every text he sent, they are officially dating and it is so exciting!

As happy as I am for her – and I really, truly am beyond thrilled – watching her get dolled up for dates and hear her giggling through the wall when he spends the night makes me miss being in a relationship myself. I’ve really enjoyed the time I’ve spent single this year – let’s face it: the twin beds in college dorm rooms were not meant to fit two people – but seeing someone else enjoying the bliss that comes at the beginning of a relationship is making me a bit, well, jealous.

Now don’t get me wrong – my momentary pangs of jealousy are nothing compared to my overall glee for my dear friend, but the jealousy is definitely there. When he brings her candy at the library, when he sends her a goodnight text, when they cuddle on the futon to watch TV; it all makes me nostalgic for the good things about being in a relationship, which are suddenly the only things I can think about. Even with my old boyfriends that were, in general, all schmucks. Read More »


Tuffy Luv Sez: Bi Some Time

Question for Tuffs?! Email her at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com and by gum get that shiz adDRESSED!!!

Dear Tuffy Luv,

Okay so here’s my problem. I met this really nice guy at the school I just transferred to. I thought things weren’t going to pass a certain point because, one, he’s just a freshman and I’m a junior, and he’s also my little sister’s best friend from high school.

Things were great at first because we have so much in common. I was starting to get really close to him and would spend every day with him and began to develop feelings for him. I invited him out with me and another close friend (we’ll call him Joe) and things were a little weird because my new friend isn’t the most social person.

I have to step back a second because I left out one big piece of information. Both of my friends are bi. Joe came out to me early on in the Fall. The new friend came out to be in late September. Read More »


Can You Handle A Long Distance Relationship?

long distance copy

As someone who’s spent a majority of their college career in an LDR, only spending summers and holidays with my guy, I consider myself an expert in the intricacies of the dreaded time apart. Are you thinking of starting one as you and your warm-weather fling get ready for separate schools next fall? Answer the following Q’s to see if you have what it takes!

Drinkin’
When you get drunk, is it impossible for you to keep the flirting to a minimum? Do your beer goggles often lead you to bring guys back for some late night noshing and nooky after the bars?

Do you think that “making out” with a rando is okay as long as it only happens once and you can’t really remember it the next morning?

BFFs
Are you jealous of your girlfriends who are in relationships? If your roommate was sleeping at her boyfriend’s house every night, would you wallow in depression knowing that your boyfriend was miles away?

Read More »


Bad Advice Men Get: Phase Out the Best Friend

jealous boyfriend

Men are tricky creatures. As much as we may wish we could read their minds, it just isn’t possible (yet… come on, science!). But don’t worry, I have discovered a trick to help us understand them a little more.

We all know guys that have picked up Cosmo from time-to-time (or have a monthly subscription) to help them figure out what their women are thinking. Hell, I bet a bunch of guys are reading CollegeCandy right now to try and figure something out about their girlfriends. Well ladies, we can do the same thing! Taking a peek at the kind of dating and relationship advice guys are being fed is a great way to get into the mind of a dude and see why he acts the way he does. Every Wednesday I’ll be doing just that. Hopefully, this will explain a few things…

This Week’s Article: Her Best Friend Is A Guy by askmen.com.

As someone who has a lot of close platonic male friends in her life, this article particularly irked me. And by “irked,” I mean “pissed me the hell off.”

The boys (they are not men) over at AskMen refuses to believe that a male and female can truly ever be good friends. As they say, “we’re operating under the assumption that heterosexual men and women cannot be best friends; sex always gets in the way.” I know many people may believe this, but I am living testament to the fact that it is not true. I would never dream of sleeping with my best guy friends, who I absolutely adore, and I know they feel the same way about me. In fact, the mere thought of it all makes me puke in my mouth a little.

Moving on… Read More »


Is It Ever OK for a Guy to Be Jealous?

jealousy

[This post is courtesy of our gal pal, Marie Claire.]

Most of the time I see jealous and overly possessive guys driving their girlfriends away.    They appear to be controlling and insecure.

But, then again, if you don’t act jealous at all, you look like you don’t care.  Sadly, I’ve seen women admit that it’s nice to know that their guy is a little jealous or possessive of them.

So let’s go over the characters in our lives that may make our significant others jealous: Read More »


Your Ex and His Next: How to Deal

how_to_survive_a_breakup2.jpgGetting over a guy can be tough, especially if he ended things before you were ready to end them. It’s hard enough to try to slip back into the single lifestyle and get over the boy who hurt you when the breakup cuts all of your ties; however, it’s even more difficult when you do see your ex…and harder still to see him with his next.

When a guy moves on before you do, it can be tempting to cry, throw things, or scream like a banshee, but none of those things will make your man come back to you. If you handle the situation like an adult, you will find yourself on a much smoother road to recovery, and you will maintain your dignity along the way.

1. Don’t Avoid the Situation

You go to a party, feeling single and ready to mingle, and then you see them, canoodling on the couch. Your first instinct might be to leave the party in tears and spend the rest of the weekend in bed, sobbing into your pillow. Likewise, if you and your ex shared a group of friends, you might try to avoid social situations where you might run into them. In either scenario, you’ll make getting over him even more difficult, because you’ll be missing out. Who knows? The party you fled might have been one of the greatest nights in your college career. Tough it out, and try to have a good time. Read More »


The CC Weekly Weigh In: All Is Fair In Love, Right?

love.jpg

There is a big difference between girls who are crazy and girls who do some crazy things. Right?

RIGHT?!

I mean, we’ve all done something a little…extreme when feelings were involved. It’s not our fault; our hearts were doin’ the talking.

And, yes, we may have “accidentally” dumped a drink on the girl our crush was flirting with at the bar, but it’s not like we cut off her ponytail when she wasn’t looking (although we may have considered it).

Everyone has been driven to the brink of insanity at some point in their lives, so in an effort to make ourselves feel a little less psycho-girly, we asked the CollegeCandy writers to weigh in on their deepest, darkest moments. Feel free to share your own crazy moments in the comments section. We won’t judge.

Julia – UC Berkeley: I’ve definitely pretended I was forming a study group to get the number of a hot guy in my class!

Alex – Cornell: I’m a fantastic Facebook creeper. Even if I only get a first name, I can almost always find their profile. That’s the beauty of Thunder Bay! More specifically, I’ve drunkenly added bar makeouts; that’s just embarassing!

Lauren – University of Michigan: I may or may not have befriended every one of his roommates and friends just to get to him. And walked 15 mins out of my way to pass his house on the way to class in hopes he’d be walking out at the exact same time…. Read More »