So you know how celebs are always telling us that they’re just like you and me, that underneath their cool clothes and their fancy cars and their mansions, they’re just normal people? Well, it turns out they weren’t lying. It turns out they have unachievable dreams too. While we spend our time wishing we could be more like them, certain celebs are wishing and waiting for the day they’ll get to play their idols. Some of them have a thing for comic book heroes. Others prefer remakes or Tim Burton movies.  And some well, some are just weird.

Want to know who Robert Pattinson wishes he could play? (I always thought he was playing his dream role!) What about Channing Tatum (It’s hot.)  Justin Bieber? (It’s disturbing.)  Bradley Cooper? (It’s swoon worthy.) How about Jennifer Garner or Nicki Minaj?

Click here to read all about these celebs and their dream jobs.

We want to be Jennifer Garner.

Drama for Jen Aniston’s new movie!

Fashion week does party dresses. Which would you wear?

Chris Brown uses Twitter to get Rihanna back?

Michigan rep. proposes free college tuition.

We’re back with another edition of G.W.W.E. (Guys We Wanna Eff), and no, that’s not a typo! This week, we have a very special treat in store–instead of featuring one luscious lad, we have decided to salute ten of Hollywood’s hottest vets in honor of Memorial Day. Some battled enemies on the war front, others on screen, but all of these studs are on our short list for a pleasure-filled patriotic eff. After all, what’s hotter than a man in uniform?

1. Jimmy Stewart (US Air Force)
The star of my all-time favorite movie, It’s a Wonderful Life, served part of his wonderful life in the US Air Force.  Looks like Clarence the angel wasn’t the only one who got his wings!

2. Elvis Presley (US Army)
The King was a member of the Army before he was a member of the Rock-n-Roll Hall of Fame.  For his service and those sick swingin’ hips, I’ve got just one thing to say: thankyuhverymuuhch!

3.  Jake Gyllenhaal (Screen Vet)
The ferocious indie-hunk immortalized the first Gulf War in 2005′s Jarhead. Tell me, Jake, have those guns in that photo been authorized by the Marines?

4.  Josh Hartnett (Screen Vet)
Josh has pulled two, erm, tours of duty–one in the WWII film Pearl Harbor, and another in Black Hawk Down, the film portraying American involvement in the Somalian civil war.

5. Martin Sheen (Screen Vet)
Another two-time screen vet, the West Wing President was first a US Army captain in Francis Ford Coppola’s Vietnam War epic, Apocalypse Now and as Civil War General Robert E. Lee in Gettysburg.

6. Alan Alda (Screen Vet)
The recent 30 Rock guest star first shot to stardom on one of television’s most popular shows, the Korean War comedy M*A*S*H.  Anyone who can make wartime funny is worth an eff in my book.

7. Humphrey Bogart (US Navy)
One of the true classic film stars, Casablanca cassanova Bogart served in the US Navy (and enjoyed all the girls he met at sea!).

8. Matthew Broderick (Screen Vet)
SJP’s hubby made unfettered determinism (and facial hair) sexy in the timeless Civil War film, Glory. No trace of Ferris Bueller-esque slackerism here.

9. Joe DiMaggio (Army)
He thanked the good Lord for making him a Yankee, but we thank the pinstriped papa for his service to his country. Joltin’ Joe took a hiatus from the House that Ruth Built and joined the Army during WWII.

10. Ben Affleck (Screen Vet)
Oscar-winning celeb and Jennifer Garner’s baby daddy had all of our hearts a-thumpin’ in Pearl Harbor, alongside fellow hottie Josh Hartnett (see above).

Ladies, who else do you think deserves a spot on our list of V.W.W.E. (Vets We Wanna Eff)?

The most stylish people on TV.

Leann Rimes puts her hubby back in the closet.

Perfectionism may be bad for your health.

Jennifer Garner can’t run.

8 essential sex positions for summer.

Old school repubs are scared.

Everyone should share their sex stories.

Forever 21 calls Kim Kardashian fat.

Jen Garner and Ben Affleck having sex problems?

Your daily dose of Chase Crawford.

Just who is Jason Wu?

The Inauguration…from space.

Did Jennifer Garner already lose the baby weight?

The richer the guy, the more plentiful the orgasms.

We wish we, too, could say Leo felt like our husband.

Another hazing incident, another fraternity shut down.

Are Paris and her new BFF on the outs? Oh the horror!

More layoffs. This time at Warner Brothers.

Woman gets plowed down by a cow. In Colorado.

Potato chips and candy may be just as addictive as tabacco!

Man loses millions. Fakes his own death. Not very good at it.

Welcome to the world, Seraphina Garner Affleck!

Whitney Port shows a bit too much on the beach.

Even Blake Lively got teased in middle school.

Public Universities still providing jobs in crappy economy.

Colleges sink to new low to get even more of your money: snacks!

Someone in the White House is a sex offender?

If the sand and accents weren’t enough, here is another reason I’m moving to Australia.

Security is getting tight for the big Inauguration.

Ben and Jen: Super Fertile.

Too cloudy to go to the beach? Add these 80′s classics to your Netflix queue.

Exclusive look at the crazy new script from Tarantino. Awww yeah!

Nothing ruins a day at the beach quite like a shark. And I really needed a tan!

The new iPhone is out. We are not too happy about it, but what do the critics say?

Teen pregnancy on the up and up for the first time in over a decade. Could this be Juno’s doing?

Also on the rise, Wal-Mart stores. They. Are. Everywhere.

As if TV couldn’t get any worse – Nicole Richie gets another show.

2 words that should never go together: orgasmic and childbirth. Yes, there is a video.

Maybe this will inspire you to recycle. Think of the dolphins, people!

Gender equality on the road at last! Well, at least on the signs. Baby steps, ladies; baby steps.

I can’t believe that I’m going to say this – but if you forget the infidelity and the fact that he probably gets his hair Japanese straightened, Mario Lopez has a smokin’ body.

Song of the week

Katy Perry, “I Kissed a Girl”.

I hate this song.

Freak Show

Verne Troyer/Mini-Me sex tape. Why don’t they just pour acid on our eyes?

Am I the only one who thinks that Jennifer Lopez would be absolutely frightening if you pissed her off even just a tiny bit? FYI, you may get the store discount if you ask nicely and don’t have your bodyguard show a gun to the shop girl.

OK! Magazine paid Jamie Lynn Spears $1 million for baby pictures. A million. For Jamie. Lynn. Spears?

Splitsville?

Madonna and Guy Ritchie divorce rumors have been in and out of the rags for years, but it seems Madonna is getting a bit more serious this time.

Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck are so rarely photographed together that I’m not surprised that the separation rumor is floating around. Still, I don’t want to believe it.

Is there a worse way for a relationship to end? Anne Hathaway’s boyfriend is going to jail for a loooong time. Further proof that celebrities are not perfect: they don’t know how to pick ‘em either.

Movies

Am I the only one who is just waiting out this wave of crappy movies for “The Dark Night” to come out? I miss my boyfriend (in my head).

Couple of the Week

Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith. I love them together.

[Photo courtesy of Espn950.com]

As my friends and I gathered in my living room with drinks and dinner last night to watch the Oscars, we all recognized a very obvious fact: We were not gathered to actually watch the awards. In fact, none of us cared that much about who won anything. (especially not at the tipsy end of the evening). The truth is that we just wanted to see what everyone was wearing. We wanted to either rip them apart or drop our jaws in jealousy. And so that’s what happened.

There weren’t as many atrocities as I had secretly hoped for last night. I always kind of want Cameron Diaz to show up in a trash bag and slippers. But hey, lets face, she’d look like a babe even in that. I guess what I’m trying to say is that no one gave me nightmares last night.

Check out the red carpet looks after the jump. Click the photo to see the full gallery.

However, Jennifer Garner takes home the “We wanna be that bitch” trophy from me and my friends. Our jaws dropped in jealousy. We wanted her dress. Her hair. Her necklace. Her…ugh. We simply have never ever seen her look as good as she did last night…which was…FLAWLESS.

Marion Cotillard may have looked like she was wearing a quilt that her grandmother made…(except really it was Jean Paul Gaultier who made it)…nonetheless, she looked sexy in that quilt. Sexy AND unique. It was a great combination.

Amy Adams may have looked good, but she pissed me off. She ornamented her finger tips with a totally pointless bag. Yes, it was a pretty bag. However, admitting that your little princess purse has NOTHING IN IT (which, yes, she did do) is about as noble as admitting you stuffed your bra to me. As my roommate put it; “It’s a pretty purse. But it belonged in a museum…not on her arm–empty.”

Anne Hathaway, on the other hand, didn’t PISS me off, per se…instead, she just made me sad. It’s wrong of me to associate her automatically with her character in The Devil Wears Prada, but I cannnn’t helllllllpppp itttttt. I thought she was that down ass chick who looked hot and didn’t care about being paper thin. Last night, however, she was sickly skinny looking (and I’m not saying this because she is pale…I’m saying it because I think she lost too much weight). She just looked like a scared little girl who had just gotten her first detention.

All in all, my friends and I knitpicked all night long at dresses that were more or less OKAY. The only question I really have is: Who told Miley Cyrus to drop her goth rocker look? I was really digging it…