The breakout stars of 2011

We’ve come a long way since high school friends

Are you checking Facebook and Twitter during sex?

Even Jennifer Love Hewitt reads self-help books on love!

How to get a braided updo

Are you ruining your vocal cords?

The flip side of jealousy

Does wearing makeup make you successful?

Guess who Cameron Diaz was spotted with!

So for those of you not in the know, Bieber cut his luscious locks. I should admit I don’t have Bieber fever, and I actually think he looks 10 times better without that awkward swoop thing that Tom Brady Stole. Which brings me to my next point…why is this news? Why is this a top story of all my favorite celebrity blogs?

I get hair cuts all the time and it never stops the presses, so why should Bieber’s new shag be talked about like it actually means anything? Or our favorite friend, Jen’s, new style (which isn’t new for anyone who actually watched ‘Friends’).

Shouldn’t we be more focused on other things, like I don’t know…their talent? Career? Upcoming movies? Or anything else remotely interesting? But their hair — I mean, come on people, when did celebrities’ hair styles become more popular than the celebrities themselves?

Well I guess a while ago, because after doing a little bit of research, I discovered that Justin and Jen aren’t the first celebrity haircuts to set the world on fire…here are 17 more:

Can I get some Red Bull up in here? I’m majorly struggling right now. It’s like the crash that comes after eating a bag of Sour Patch Kids, only instead of sugar I was hopped up on sequins and cleavage and Brad Pitt’s sunglasses.

Yes, you know I’m talking about the glamour that was the Golden Globe’s Red Carpet.

Of course there are always lots of entertaining moments in the award show itself (Ricky Gervais was hosting, after all), but like most ladies with an eye for fashion, the true highlight of the show comes before it even starts. And last night’s show before the show did not disappoint. From the stunning shoes (I’m looking at your hidden feet, Olivia Wilde!) to the bright hues (word to your mother, Angelina) to the style doo doos (how else do you describe Christina Aguilera’s ‘fit?), the 2011 Golden Globes red carpet had me on the edge of my futon.

So after 3 hours of acceptance speeches during which I did some careful consideration (and drank a few glasses of Franzia), I bring you the best dressed, worst dressed, most WTF dressed and, just for fun, the sexiest men of the 2011 Golden Globes.

Enjoy.

Who was your fave? The biggest hot mess? Share the pics below!

Every day we’re bombarded with a million different messages about what we are supposed to look like. And tell you what, our not-so-scientific-yet-totally-accurate visual research proves that 99% of girls out there don’t fit the mold. So instead of telling you how to wear your hair, or how much weight to lose, or which one of Heidi Montag’s many surgeries to get (because, really, look where that got her), we’re going to celebrate these so-called beauty flaws with beautiful women every single week.

Last week we celebrated the natural nose. Today, let’s talk about curves.

It’s no secret that Hollywood likes their actresses to look anorexic-chic. But that doesn’t mean that all the women in Hollywood are conforming to that reasonable ridiculous standard. This week we’re putting on a spotlight on the curvy and voluptuous celebrities who haven’t let their bigger bodies stop them from having even bigger careers.

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Too lazy to peruse Perez this week?
Too busy to sift through all the garbage for the real gossip gems?
Wondering what Tiger’s been up to since he made that stupid speech last week?

Thank goodness for me! Don’t waste your time in the grocery store checkout line staring at last week’s gossip (use it to stare that the other odd things they’ve got hanging up there….foot file? Next to the food? Ew). Here’s your gossip cheat sheet of the week: the biggest Hollywood stories and, just for good measure, a little pinch of not-so-big Hollywood stories.

1. Top story again this week is Jesse James’ alleged infidelities against Sandra Bullock. First we uncovered (which wasn’t hard, considering how little this girl wears) that Michelle “Bombshell” McGee is a white supremacist, sporting racist tats and posing in Nazi themed photos (so classy). There have also been two other (tattooed) women to come forward in the Tiger Woods-like saga: Melissa Smith and Brigitte Daguerre. And, just this morning,  Attorney Gloria Allred came forward claiming she is representing another young woman who has proof of an affair with James. Is she the last of James’ girls? I hope not, but I have a feeling this isn’t the end of this story.

2. Speaking of Tiger Woods, he is going to play at the Masters. In fact, he’s favored to win! This is actually a smart move on his part because the Masters is so serious and people won’t be able to talk about his skankalicious ho-jumping. Oh, and he’ll be doing a press conference on April 5th at 2pm if you want to see him read another carefully crafted statement.

3. Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian have parted ways… again. The two briefly split last year, but most people are thinking this time’s for good. Some sources are reporting that Reggie cheated on Kim with January Gessert who was seen leaving his house on St. Patty’s Day in the wee hours of the morning. (Oooooh, walk of shame!) But other sources claim that Reggie broke up with Kim because she’s too focused on the spotlight and fame.

4. Taylor Swift was spotted out to lunch with Taylor Lautner this week. Are they getting back together?? Maybe, but Swift was also seen bowling with “friend” Cory Monteith from Glee! Not that you care, but I think they are both too good for her…. and perfect for me.

5. Kate Gosselin has been deemed a total bee-yotch on the set of Dancing With The Stars. I don’t think anyone’s surprised considering that woman is crazy. But Mark Ballas and Evan Lysacek are now saying she’s really sweet and everyone loves her. Hmm, for some reason I don’t believe them. Probably because they both wear sequins. Still, the biggest question is: who’s watching the kiddies?

Other Less Important News
1. Justin Bieber turned 16 this week! And, just like most 16-year-olds, the Beebs got a Range Rover from Usher. Standard. The good news is, he’s only 2 years from being legal!

2. Lady Gaga is still getting reamed for her Telephone video, but honestly, that was some fab dancing and creativity. And love it or hate it, you know you can’t stop watching it. You go, Gaga!

3. Jennifer Love Hewitt cut her hair after breaking up with Jamie Kennedy. She also wrote a book called The Day I Shot Cupid about her relationships. Now she’s single. With a bedazzled vajay. Great timing.

4. Reese Witherspoon moved on REAL fast from Jake Gyllenhaal. She’s been seen all over Hollywood with her “friend” Jim Toth, an agent. Let’s all take a moment of silence for Jake Gyllenhaal’s broken heart…..

5. Kellan Lutz is smokin!  Oh, and he’ll be portraying Poseidon in the new movie, War of the Gods, which, from what I understand (and dream), means he’ll be shirtless. A lot.

9 strange green foods to try today.

Jay Leno’s got some bullies.

Why some women are falling for Jessica Simpson.

Can Britney Spears control herself?

The best advice for student loan consolidation.

What happened to Jennifer Love and Jamie Kennedy?

Robert Pattinson bombs at the box office.

Women of the world unite. No really, they did.

Jennifer Love Hewitt is single. Again.

Men in tights. Enjoy.

Former teen stars who have actually done well.

Things just got really cute at The Limited.

Like Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Recently, she has taken the dive into dating advice-hood and wrote a book full of her own dating tips. Yes, Jennifer Love-Hewitt, a perpetually single Hollywood “star” with a string of bad relationships is offering up advice on how to succeed in the dating world. Ironic? Yes. Disturbing? Just wait.

One piece of J-Love’s sage wisdom? To “vagazzle your vajayjay.” Yes, that’s exactly what you think it is. Ms. Hewitt wants you to bedazzle your goodies. Because nothing says love like a vagina with sequins glued on.

It’s obvious that Jennifer Love Hewitt is not someone any of us should be turning to for dating or love advice. In fact, there are quite a few ladies who probably shouldn’t be starting any Dear Abby columns any time soon. Here are five we should definitely avoid.

Jessica Simpson: There are three things you should keep out of a relationship: bowel dysfunctions, a crazy and clingy father (who makes comments about your boobs), and John Mayer.  This seems to be Jessica Simpson’s ideal love triangle.  This and the fact that she is weary about the diverse qualities of chicken and tuna leaves no reason for her to sprinkle her dating advice around the world.

Heidi Montag: Unless you’re life’s dream is to marry the biggest ass-hat known to man, I wouldn’t really turn to Ms. Montag-Pratt for advice. And if marrying Spencer Pratt isn’t bad enough, girlfriend recently attempted to trick her bearded lover into having children after “forgetting” to take her birth control.  Nothing say’s “healthy relationship” like this one, folks.

Angelina Jolie: Somehow, I am discovering “stealing someone else’s man and following up with a giant litter of children” isn’t valuable dating advice.  Or kissing your own brother.  Or tattooing your boyfriend’s name on your arm. Or wearing a vile of your boyfriend’s blood on your neck. I don’t know – something about that last one just seems really effing creepy a little clingy for my taste.

Britney Spears: Two words: Adnan Ghalib. One hyphenated “word”: K-Fed. Sure, there was a little Justin Timberlake in there at one point, but I’d say taking dating advice from Britney is like taking career advice from Lindsay Lohan. Or birth control advice from Octomom.

Kate Hudson: She has landed herself quite a few hotties (Owen Wilson, Dax Sherpard, Owen Wilson, Lance Armstrong, Owen Wilson, A-Rod, Owen Wilson again!?), but I don’t think any of us are looking for advice on how to break men’s fragile little hearts then go back again and again and again and break them into smaller and smaller bits.

Pamela Anderson is a “fashion” designer.

8 habits that wreck a relationship.

Jamie Kennedy is a dawg.

We’re still mad for plaid.

Megan Fox knows her role.

Everyone needs a little purple in their closet.

Perez Hilton… TMZ… The Superficial… dListed… You name it, I read it. Probably in the past 10 minutes. I even have a special folder under my bookmarks tab for my favorite gossip websites. And it’s gotten a lot worse since I’ve started interning this summer – there’s only so many coffee runs to make and so many papers to file until I get bored and start reading up on all the latest celeb gossip.

But are all these gossip websites really the best way to spend my time? Should I really take pride in the fact that I know the latest dramz behind the scenes at Jennifer Love Hewitt’s house? Help, I’m torn:

Love It
I have a not-so-hidden propensity for the gossip, the chitchat, the rumors, the hearsay, whatever you want to call it. Basically, I love me some dirty laundry. The dirtier, the better, I say. Britney’s mad head-shaving incident? I was one of the first to express my shock. Lindsay Lohan’s bobble-head phase? Get the girl a double cheeseburger and animal style fries please. And Paris’ poor little Tinkerbell nowhere to be found? Time for some, “MIA: Dog,” signs around the neighborhood.

What can I say? I like being in the know.

Juicy celeb gossip is always a good conversation starter when the babbling river runs a little dry, and there’s always something new happening. It keeps me on my toes, not to mention keeps my brain preoccupied over those hump days at work when the clock seems to be running low on batteries and I’m about to collapse onto my desk and start drooling all over those super important reports I’m supposed to be filing. Plus, it’s important to be a well-rounded individual who knows what is going on; if I want to accurately follow up on the world, I need to know what’s going on in Hollywood too, right?

Loathe It
Ok, I know. I could spend those countless hours of needless gossiping on more useful things, like picking up a new hobby (basket weaving, knitting, jewelry-making) or even learning a new language (conversational skills in French would be advantageous in case I meet any cute European boys in the future after all). I bet if you added up all the time I spent on gossip sites it’s probably more than I spend doing homework. And definitely more than I spent studying for the SAT (bad call, I must say). It seems like the more you read, the more you want to know, and with all the links to other gossip sites along the side there’s just no stopping any time soon.

But after spending hours brushing up on the latest goings-on in the Gosselin house, I do start to feel really bad. I mean, I’m not the one writing it, but I am the one people are writing this stuff for and is it really my business what is happening in someone’s personal life? Is it really OK for me to sit here and laugh as someone’s relationships/career/mental health go down the tubes? Celebrities are people too and I can’t imagine speaking this viciously about the people in my real life…

But I just don’t know if I can stop. It’s all so…juicy. And accessible. Just a click and a scroll and I’ve got my gossip fix…. I’m not sure if I can fight the urge.

You know you love me.

XOXO,

Gossip Girl