I’ve had a fun few weeks, full of productive days that involved sleeping until noon, catching up on the new season of The Bachelor, and trying to determine the real reason Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal broke up. So I really don’t have time for pesky things like classes, and homework, papers and projects. There are so many other things I’d rather be doing. In fact, now that I think about it, there’s not much I wouldn’t rather be doing than starting classes…

10. Go a week without internet access. If you knew me at all you’d know this is big. Very big. I don’t think I’ve gone 24 hours without internet access, never mind an entire WEEK. It would be pure, unadulterated torture for me to go a week without updating Twitter, Facebook stalking or checking my favorite blogs (Looking at you, CollegeCandy), but I would do it if I meant I didn’t have to go class. I really, really would.

9. Spend some quality time with my professor during office hours. Yes, I would. I would make awkward conversation with my professors in their creepy offices with their creepy things if I didn’t have to listen to them lecture. I would dodge questions about the lack of progress I’ve been making on my thesis, and suck up so they’ll write me awesome recommendations letters. Just don’t make me go to class.

8. Listen to “California Gurls” on repeat. When the song first came out, this wouldn’t have seemed so bad. But after a summer of hearing this song every day at least twice a day, I cringe at just the intro. Still though, Katy Perry seems preferable to professors. Greetings loved ones, let’s take a journey!

7. Let Jenny Humphrey do my makeup. I am not a fan of the raccoon eye look, even less so when Taylor Momsen is the one wearing it. But I would wear that raccoon eye makeup for a week straight (and then another week because it will take that long to get it off) if it meant I didn’t have to go to class that week.

6. Submit an application to be on the Bachelor. I have a love/hate relationship with one of the greatest reality TV shows of our time. I love the drama that ensues every season. I love the ridiculous scandal that always spontaneously manifests when someone is supposed to be on a fantasy date. I love that none of these relationships barely make it a month in the real world.  But I hate that there are women out there desperate enough to go on this show. But, hey, I would be one of those women if it meant I could skip the spring semester. Let me just practice crying on demand.

5. Clean my brother’s room. I know none of you have ever seen my brother’s room (or at least I hope you haven’t), so I’ll give you a description. Just picture taking three weeks worth of your trash and dumping it on the floor. Then add some football gear, a few loads of dirty laundry, and lots of sneakers.

4. Get slushied, Glee style. I hate those scenes when Rachel and co. get a slushy thrown in their face. I just can’t watch it. The thought of washing cherry flavored slushie out of my hair makes me flinch in a mixture of fear and disgust. But I would totally let Noah Puckerman slushy me if it meant I could skip Senior Seminar this week.

3. Rewrite my final papers. And that’s a lot to write. I mean, I used a lot of blue books on these last few finals. I wrote and I wrote and then I wrote some more for every one of my classes. But one day of cramping my hand up would be worth it if it meant I could put off starting towards this next round of finals.

2. Read Snooki’s new book. Cover to cover, front to back, word for word. I would read the whole damn thing if it meant no school. And I’m an English major, people. An ENGLISH major. That’s like asking a professional chef to serve Bagel Bites for dinner.  

1. Go without coffee for an entire week. Anyone who knows me and is reading this is probably in absolute shock right now, or maybe even in a bit of disbelief. Because you see, I’m kind of a caffeine addict. You know, it’s sort of the reason I live and breathe. It’s the light of my life, the reason I wake up in the morning. But if I committed I could totally do this. Especially if it meant not having to go to class, I mean…

Oh hell, I’m going to class, alright?

[Check out Jenn's other musings-in-the-form-of-a-list here.]

The holiday season, I’ve come to realize, is all about the traditions. Baking cookies. Listening to festive music. Wrapping presents. Eating way too much in a way too short amount of time. Shopping for days. Decorating. It wouldn’t be Christmas without all of it.

But really, probably my favorite Christmas tradition is the endless Christmas movies. It starts on Thanksgiving day with March of the Wooden Soldiers and continues through the New Year. The perfect excuse for movie marathons and munching on sweets, all I really want to do is grab some hot chocolate and those sugar cookies I bought baked, and settle down with one of my favorite Christmas movies.  Any of these will do.

Click on any movie to get started!

"I came as fast as I could...in my hooker boots!"

Alright GG minions, fill in the blank:

“Gossip Girl was depressing this week because ____.”

If you can’t think of anything at the top of your head, I’ve got it.  Gossip Girl was depressing this week because 80% of the episode took place in a hospital, 10% in rehab, and the final 10% in jail.  And all along I thought Thanksgiving was only about pies and tradition (and awkwardly avoiding drunk Uncle Steve), but what do I know?

Despite my previous attempt (and some damn good ideas, if I do say so myself), Gossip Girl producers did not hear my ‘let’s change Gossip Girl once and for all’ desperate call.  I had hope for them, I really did.  And now I’m left binge eating an entire bowl of popcorn and sitting in my family room more frustrated than I was when I sat down last week to get some GG and discovered there was no episode. Talk about a waste of perfectly good cookie dough…. Anyways, this was the most depressing, non-satisfying episode EVER.  I didn’t even get a chance to marvel at Serena’s amazing attire because she was wearing a green knit robe the entire episode. And with that hair she looked like a character out of ‘Where the Wild Things Are.’  While Lily is done being punished by Serena’s antics, I’m just about DONE wasting an hour of my Monday, only to find out Juliet lounges around her dirty loft in a mini-dress with a hole in the back and the dude playing her “brother” Ben is a terrible actor.

However,  I would like to take a moment to thank the Upper East Side heavens Dan is thriving in Movember.  Dude was smokin’ last night. His jaw bone was the only thing that kept me captive on my couch for the entire episode.

Since it was one of those typical disastrous Thanksgiving episodes Gossip Girl is infamous for, and the classic “family-time” one-liners were flying, I decided it would be only proper to take the time to reminisce and appreciate some of the more memorable and awesome quotes from last night’s episode.  That’s what the day after Thanksgiving is for after all, am I right? Talking smack about your relatives….

What?
Just my family?

Oh. Well, let’s do this anyway.

“If Bruce and Demi can do it, run-ins can’t be that difficult” -Blair
Word, sista. You do always have the best lines of the show. But, that being said, I would much rather you two have your lips run in to one another in Chuck’s limo.  I was so sad about the lack of Chuck/Blair love that I allowed myself to eat another slice of pumpkin pie. (Which means I polished off the damn thing.) So much for that two-hour wedding special (or Victoria’s Secret bikini bod) I’ve been waiting for…

“I’ve baked you an apple pie with a file inside. Happy Thanksgiving brother.” -Juliet
WTF, Juliet? She is one crazy lady. Like she could bake in that tiny studio of hers! I am dying for Blair to sink her claws into her.  I don’t even have words for this woman.  Serena is in rehab, Vanessa is roaming the streets with no family, Dan is making out with his step-sister again, Nate is doing the Dr.Phil with his parents; what has she done to the Upper East side!?  She made Lily cry!  Just leave already, biatch. And take your outlet mall dresses with you!

“Serena is a troubled young woman Dan, not just the pretty girl at the party.” -Lily
“And she’s your step-sister.” How does no one ever mention that? But anyways, shut up Lily. Dan isn’t listening. Serena’s stepbrother obviously knows her kissing style best.  He always has, he always will.

“How many times do I have to go Courtney Love on your ass?” -Blair
Can Blair just be my BFF already?  This girl is unstoppable and amazing.  I’m going to be sad when Little J goes back to her mama’s by herself because she brings out the feisty side in Blair I love.  By the way, every scene where Jenny had to walk past a group of people, I went into a fit of laughter.  She looks like an angry, gothic little gremlin hooker wherever she goes. I can never be 100% sure, but that’s not a new trend from NY Fashion Week, right?

“I’m a firm believer people should pay for what they’ve done.” -Juliet
Ugh! Enough already, you rat.

“What do you say we do ourselves some frontier justice and find that b*tch.” -Blair
Yes!  This quote was my ultimate favorite of the entire night.  Maybe Chuck can’t be Blair’s friend right now, but I sure would love to be!  When push comes to shove, you’re going to want Blair on your side.  Meow.  I can’t wait until the next episode so Blair can pull Juliet’s hair just like Snookie and the Jersey Shore dump.  It could go down in a jail cell, or a gala…whatever.

“Did you know at one time, Thanksgiving was my favorite holiday?” -Lily
It’s too bad Lily and Rufus have two daughters they can’t control. Maybe if they could they wouldn’t be eating take-out french fries (in a rehab facility) every year. Which reminds me…I wonder what LiLo did for Thanksgiving….

I hoped you learned a lesson this week, Gossip Girl fan club.  Remember, as long as the check arrives every month, the past stays the past. Man, I’m glad Lily is not my mother.

XOXO
GGRG
(Gossip Girl Recap Girl)

When Monday rolls around, I’m usually gathering all of the snacks I can find, burrowing into my couch, pulling a blanket to my chin, having a mini freak-out, and anticipating the glory that is Gossip Girl.  Seriously, that television production has rendered me completely useless every Monday for nearly three years now. But, it’s been a good run.

Until now.

Did the original GG producers go on an extended vacay? Are the new GG producers out to turn my life into a pile of ashes that have been burned from the horrible story line that is this season’s Gossip Girl??  I’m deeply sorry if I’ve offended anyone who’s enjoying the season right now.  Actually, I changed my mind.  No, I’m not.  This shiz has been as entertaining as a Quidditch match at a nursing home.  I’m dying of boredom.

Seriously, is this all you can come up with this season, GG? It seems as if time and ideas are running out.  We are back where we started…Serena wants to run away forever, she makes out with her (ehem, stepbrother) Dan again, Jenny has no friends, and Blair is still trying to find herself.  I think I just snapped my jaw mid-yawn. Borrrr-innggg.

Gossip Girl: You are like my mother when she tells me to get a job, make my bed, and to turn down the volume Chelsea Lately. I’ve heard it all before.

So, since Gossip Girl has been MIA for a week now, maybe the week off has given those producers time to think about what they’ve done and fix it. We’re all supposed to learn from our mistakes, right?  Well, let’s hope the people behind Gossip Girl have learned a lesson or 12. Here are a few things we are hoping the producers have come up to make Gossip Girl shiny and new again.

Serena: The Real Story
In the next episode, we could find out the real truth about Serena and her fickle ways with men: she’s actually a lesbian. She doesn’t know when to properly come out, and she doesn’t want to make Lily write (yet another) check for her.  Eventually, her truth will come out, most likely at a gala, hotel party, ball, or some other event that brings everyone together in couture dresses. But it won’t be Serena’s idea to share the big secret. Team Brooklyn will pull a curtain away from Serena’s make out sesh with…wait, that’s not Lonely Boy.

Nate and Dan:  When Boredom Strikes…
Without Serena, things are getting a little melancholy on the Upper East Side.  In a marijuana induced angst sesh (and after they bond when Nate teaches Dan how to work a lacrosse stick), they end up going back to Nate’s hotel suite.  After a few stiff drinks, Dan and Nate turn their bromance into a romance, get tipsy, and hook up. Before you know it, they are walking hand and hand to Central Park.  Awww, cute!

Rufus: Takes His Baking to the Business World
Since Lily clearly can’t get enough of her hubby’s great cooking (the sarcasm is dripping like syrup off of a stack of his famed waffles here) and he can’t handle his roll as boring housewife, Rufus takes his waffle making abilities to the business world. He writes a business proposal highlighting the important role waffles plays in the preservation of families and before we know it, Rufus buys a ‘waffle truck,’ and roams the city as a breakfast maker with a cause.

Blair and Chuck: I Hear Wedding Bells
Since the only thing I actually enjoy watching on the show is Blair and Chuck, why not take their relationship to the next level?  Honestly, I’m not sure if I would get up at 3 AM to watch Prince William wed Kate Middleton’s royal nuptials, but Blair and Chuck on the other hand?  I would take a two-hour special and the risk of drooling on my shirt to see that any day.  Oh, and make their engagement a short one so I don’t have to suffer through five episodes to witness the wedding of the century. Perfect.

Juliet:  Diminishes the Mystery and Gets.Out.Of. New York.
Ok, enough already!  It’s about time we figure out why Juliet’s brother is in jail so we can be donzo with these fools!  In my ideal Gossip Girl world, the mystery of Juliet and her a-hole bro would be disposed, the sketchiness of it all diminished, and Juliet would run out of the city like a little girl (which she clearly is not).

Jenny: Gets a Haircut
And runs out of eyeliner.

Sigh, I hope someone’s listening out there. I guess we’ll find out tonight.

Since most of us won't get near those nasty tubs in the communal bathroom, I've got a few better ideas for relaxation...

October is a busy month. Between midterms and registration, and finding the perfect Halloween costume, things can get pretty crazy there for a while. But it’s important to remember to take a step back from it all for a while. Relax. Enjoy the little things. Relieve some stress.

Here’s how…

10. Indulge in some junk food. This probably isn’t the best advice, since eating your feelings isn’t exactly healthy, but chocolate cures all. At least for a little while. So just indulge for a little bit. Something sweet, or something salty, or something sweet and salty (chocolate covered pretzels…mmm…). Just a little pick me up. Besides, isn’t dark chocolate good for you anyway?

9. Dance it out. Yes, I am totally ripping off Grey’s Anatomy here, but the “twisted sisters” know what they’re talking about.  Dancing is an excellent stress reliever and you don’t even have to have any rhythm whatsoever. (Trust me. I would know.) Just enjoy yourself. And relax.

8. Shop. “You know that thing when you see someone cute and he smiles and your heart kind of goes like warm butter sliding down hot toast? Well that’s what it’s like when I see a store. Only it’s better.”  Oh Becky Bloomwood, I couldn’t have said it better myself.

7. Get that heart rate up. “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy.” –Elle Woods. (I apologize for that one but Legally Blonde was on WeTV this week.)

6. Organize and categorize. Maybe it’s just me but I’ve always found the process of putting things in order to be extremely calming. Freaking out about a big test? Make a study schedule. Nervous about a date? Plan the perfect outfit. Once you know exactly what you’re doing it will be a lot easier to get it done.

5. Get in some quality BFF time. Whether you and your friends are staying in with pizza, beer, and bad TV, or heading out in heels, a good old fashioned girls night cures all. Who cares about what’s happening next week when you’re having the time of your life right now? Let loose. Have some fun. Let your friends distract you. Nothing will seem as bad the next day (except maybe that hangover…).

4. Curl up in bed and watch a movie. Or you know, have a Gossip Girl marathon. The point is that losing yourself in someone else’s drama will distract you from your own. Whatever you have going on won’t seem nearly as terrible after you’ve seen Jenny Humphrey’s eye makeup.

3. Laugh. Search some YouTube videos. Visits Texts from Last Night. Call up your funniest friend. Look at last weekend’s Facebook pictures. Just let off some steam and enjoy some absurdity.

2. Catch up with CollegeCandy. You need some downtime to just breathe and be? Put on your favorite pair of sweats, get comfy, grab your laptop and start reading. Want to feel inspired? Check out this article. Or maybe you need a good laugh? Morning after stories will do that for you.  Or just scroll through the feed and see what you missed.

1. Make a list. Like I said when I took on this column, list making is my life. It keeps your organized. It makes you feel like you have some semblance of control of everything going on around you. It gives you a focus for just a little while. It makes you feel good when you get to cross something off.  And the results are always entertaining.

How about it, ladies? Has this week been as stressful for you as it has for me? What do you do to let off some steam? Let me know in the comments below!

OH THE HORROR.

Speaking of horror, can we talk about this week’s episode of Gossip Girl? Wait, of course we can, that’s why you’re here, right? I mean, it’s been two weeks since the last installment, so you can pretty much say I’m STILL hyperventilating from all that goodness.  The CW Network was so right – waiting for next week’s episode is going to make me very uncomfortable. Even if I plan on being drunk in a tutu for 72 hours straight this week.

But back to last night.  First of all, let’s state the obvious, shall we?  Little J is back with her atrocious uni-braided horse’s mane …. and I couldn’t be more happy about it.

Welcome back, Jenny Humphrey! I’ve missed you more than I miss my 3rd grade metabolism.
OK, almost.

The little blonde freakshow truly lit up this episode and made quite a scene both in Blair’s “Chuck nightmare” and real life.  Speaking of nightmares, since it’s getting so close to Halloween (and since this episode was such a hot mess of amazingness), I thought it would be a great idea to to highlight the Upper East Side elites’ all-time worst nightmares, one richy rich kid at a time. 

Serena
Her Psychology of Business Prof./Her Roots
They say waking up is hard to do, especially when wake up after spending an entire night shooting the shiz with your professor and need a major root touch up.  Seriously Serena, fix those things!  Anyway, why is Serena’s prof her worst nightmare? Well, he’s in cahoots with our nightmare, Juliet.  Unfortunately, Colin’s “You’re not one of my conquests because you refused to be conquered” line wins Serena over.  Lily’s comment (and reverse psychology) about Serena’s good looks conflicting with her education will pump the breaks on this relationship momentarily, but we all know it’s only a matter of time until Serena does something stupid and everyone is somehow worse off because of it.

And we all know whether Colin was a bad guy or not.

Nate
Juliet/Her Broskie, Ben
Oh weird, Juliet is being super sketch-tasticle again.  Poor Nate.  Not because he’s being played by Juliet, but because he’s too love sick to figure it out. (He did always have a thing for cougars…)  And because his ignorance led to his own father getting jumped in jail by Juliet’s shady brother Ben, who used a dictionary for some batting practice against the poor guy’s face. Oh, and then old lady Juliet broke up with Nate at the end of the episode. Bummer.

Dan
Chuck
OK, the “Daniel, that seems dramatic.  You should be a writer,” was just too good of a low blow to pass up.

Jenny
Blair/Herself/Her Uni-Braid
Obviously, I will go ahead and say Blair has a starring and recurring role in Jenny Humphrey’s nightmares.  Good lord, as Jenny so eloquently stated (from behind that rat’s nest on her head), Blair is the wicked witch of the Upper East side. Sure, Jenny sorta provoked her by sleeping with Chuck and all, but ruining her meeting with the one and only Tim Gunn by painting the word “WHORE” on Jenni’s boring innovative line? That’s a low blow, even for Blair Waldorf.

But even Blair isn’t Jenny’s worst nightmare. That award might actually go to Jenny herself. (Editor’s Note: Weird. She’s my worst nightmare too!)

In Jenny’s attempt not to go back to her old conniving ways, she tries to follow the day pass rules Blair gives her but ultimately fails (miserably) when she is invited by Chuck to the Observer party and breaks some pretty serious news on Gossip Girl. We’ll get to that in a second.  But for now, it looks like in a personal struggle to find herself, Jenny can’t seem to kick her UES habits of backstabbing, cheating, and getting revenge. She’s become Blair….and that’s her worst nightmare.

Though we all know it should be that ‘do. Seriously, girl, ignoring the fact that it looks like a horse tail, the color is just all wrong for your skin tone. Get it together, Humphrey!

Blair
Chuck/Jenny

At first I wanted to say Blair’s worst nightmare was most definitely Chuck.  After all, he’s the one who got Jenny her “interview” with Tim Gunn and invited her to the Observer event to ruin Blair’s life.  But, like most GG episodes, the producers threw us a curve ball and it hit us in the face.  Jenny’s confession about losing her virginity to Chuck fooled us all. Looks like the joke is on Chuck and Blair, and J’s got the last laugh (insert evil giggle).

Chuck
Blair/Jenny

While Chuck receives pleasure from Blair’s pain, he eventually figures out what it’s like when the tables are turned.  The surprise blast on Gossip Girl about Jenny losing her V-Card to Chuck himself causes Chuck to wave the white flag and request a truce with Blair. (By the way, this part in the episode and the Eminem/Rihanna parody made me want to cry. And only partly because Blair was wearing some atrocious pajama outfit with high heeled slippers.)  It. Was. Epic. A truce between the biggest hellions on the show? Who happen to be former lovers? Who still seem to love each other long time?

We’ll see how this shakes out, because you know what they say: if you want peace, always be prepared for war.  It’s just a matter of time before the mutual destruction of Blair and Chuck. Who knew Little J was going to be the skanky ho to point that out!?

Lily: Rufus’ Chili

Because the smell of that creation lingers, people.

Alright disciples, it’s time to finish up the homework you’ve been procrastinating.  Come on, Blair said it herself – this isn’t congress, accomplish something!

XOXO,
GGRG
(Gossip Girl Recap Girl)

Do Columbia students not carry books?

Have you ever been so excited for something – counting down the minutes, planning your day around it, fantasizing about how amazingly awesome it is going to be, turning off your cell phone so you won’t be interrupted – only to be totally disappointed? Yeah, welcome to the day I lost my virginity my Monday night.

So thanks for nothing, Gossip Girl.

After Chuck’s brazen (and dare I say super sexy) declaration of war during last week’s episode, I was chomping at the bit to see how things would go down. As each day passed, I got more and more excited for my Monday night date with Chuck and the rest of the UES crew. I had dreams (that are too inappropriate to divulge here) about me, Chuck and his private plane. I had visions of a Chuck and Blair reunion. I wrote aggressive emails to the GG writing staff to push Juliet out of a window at the top of the Empire….

And then, 60 boring minutes and a bag of pretzel M&Ms later, I was bitter and angry…and really thirsty (seriously, what is it with those M&Ms?). What was it that was getting my granny panties in a bunch?

Dan and Vanessa Fight:
SHOCKER! It’s been, what, 10 minutes and they’re already having another relationship-altering altercation? About Serena?! And Rufus is trying to give advice? NO. NO WAY. SAY IT AIN’T SO! THIS COUPLE NEVER FIGHTS!

OK so, yes, this one was a bit more exciting because it wasn’t about some boring NYU writing program or an illegitimate child. And it was the result of some serious scheming on Juliet’s part. But still. It’s another fight. And another break up. And…zzzzzzz.

Chuck and Blair Battle:
I’ll admit, seeing Chuck’s sexy evil face was the highlight of my night. And his whole “I’m not trying to make a point, Blair. This is just a warm up. Whatever you want, wherever you want it, I’m going to be there to take it away from you. I wont stop until you have nothing” speech was sexy as hell. But Blair trying to impress a feminist professor by SETTING HER UP ON A DATE WITH A MAN? And Chuck swapping out that man for a lesbian with a great scarf?

Really? That’s the best you people can do? This is Chuck Effing Bass and Blair Waldorf (creator of ‘Blair Waldorfing’)! To say I’m disappointed in both of their performances is like saying that I only kinda like Dorota. Yeah, major understatement.

Serena has an STD:
First, what a lame ass GG rumor. Second, was this an episode of Gossip Girl or an after-school special about safe sex? (Or an add for Tiffany and Co.’s key collection?) And, on a completely unrelated note, this is New York City; how hard is it for Serena to hail another cab when that man-whore keeps stealing hers every morning?!

Every Girl in NY is More Pathetic Than The Other:
Blair’s minion is willing to turn on her and sell her out to Chuck Bass. Vanessa doesn’t trust her boyfriend, no matter how many times he explains himself, so she agrees to steal Serena’s phone to snoop. Some Columbia professor (who is allegedly a feminist) is willing to accept bribes (in the form of single and rich men) in exchange for a student assistant position. Nate falls for Juliet’s lies every. single. time.

Oh, right. Nate’s not a girl. Although you wouldn’t know it – the guy is such a naive wuss.

It’s enough to make you throw your cell phone. And since I’m on my third iPhone this year, I’m glad mine wasn’t within grabbing/chucking distance. Honestly, the only 30 seconds of last night’s Gossip Girl that was worth watching was the scenes for next week. Did you see it?

The thick, black eyeliner?
The long, straggly hair?
The sourpuss look?

That’s right, kids – J Humph (and the dramz) is BACK. And if that’s not enough, she’s bringing the big guns (like TIM GUNN) with her.

Let’s just hope she also brings Gossip Girl back to it’s former glory. I never thought I’d say this, but I miss the girl.

As you may have come to notice, I seem to have an affinity towards style icons that dress like they’re a little peeved about something. And Taylor Momsen is the queen of the peeve. While 17-year-old Jenny Humphrey on Gossip Girl has a few things to be angry about (namely, playing second fiddle to her perfect brother and bombshell step-sister), I’m not exactly sure what’s getting Taylor’s panties (when she wears them, that is) in a bunch. I mean, the girl works alongside some serious dime pieces like Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford and Ed Westwick, fronts her band Pretty Reckless, and models for Madonna’s upcoming fashion line called Material Girl.

But this girl is spicy, outspoken and seemingly angry, and it all comes through in the clothing (or lack thereof) that she dons. Taylor did a complete 180 and went from Upper East Side preppy with her compadre (and fellow style icon) Willa Holland to X-rated rebel. Gone are the girly dresses and frilly tops, replaced by ripped tights, heavy eyeliner and garter belts (?!). But while she’s still not legal, the way she rocks that wardrobe makes me realize that age ain’t nothing but a number.

I’m diggin Taylor’s style because it’s extreme.  Not to the point of Lady Gaga covered in fake blood, but it’s extreme to where you wonder, “What could she possibly wear next?”  It’s a little bit scandalous considering she’s still jailbait, but inspiring because she pairs it with an edgy attitude….and the mouth of a sailor. She doesn’t care what people think or say; she wears what she wants, when she wants. Some may judge her for it, but Taylor doesn’t care. And, quite frankly, I don’t care either. Taylor does rocker chic and she does it well.

And because we’re well past our barely-legal days, we can work her look without worrying about the judgment of others.

Purse, Shoes, Tights, Sunglasses, Dress, Jacket

I LOVE this look on Taylor. The sexy dress, the grungy jacket, the trendy booties. It’s a perfect mix of girly, sexy and rock; ideal for a night on the town.

The metallic clingy dress and leather jacket are practically made for each other, especially for those chilly fall nights coming our way.  The lace tights add some texture, while also feminizing (yet rock-n-roll-izing) the look even more.  And opting for suede booties instead of a standard pair of black pumps just looks….cool. Throw on a bag with chain details for some extra glam and you’ve got yourself a going-out ‘fit that’s fit for a rock ‘n roll queen.

And the best part? You can break these pieces down and work them again and again. Pair the tights with a high-waisted skirt and a cami. Wear the jacket with a flowy, floral top and some skinny jeans. Slip the dress on for date night or even a more formal date party. The possibilities are endless.

OK, I don’t like to let TV shows rule my life, but after this week’s Gossip Girl season finale and sh*tshow they call The Hills, I can’t get those fools outta my head. I even had dreams about them. So this week’s Would You Rather is inspired by my guiltiest of guilty pleasures… and it’s a doozy. Enjoy.

Would You Rather be locked in a room with Spencer Pratt (yes, crystals and all) OR Jenny Humphrey?

Things to consider: Flesh beard, nappy hair.

Vote then tell me why. Seriously, I need to know why. Mostly because I have no idea which one would be more pleasant.

I’d like to start this final GG recap by saying that I am lucky to be alive. Last night’s episode was total dramz from start to finish and not only was my heart racing, but at one point (involving a certain Humphrey and a super special Bass) I accidentally inhaled part of a cookie and had to pause the TV while I choked on it. My life flashed before my eyes and I promised God I’d never eat a sleeve of Chips Ahoy while watching TV again. When that chunky chocolate cookie chunk finally passed, I kept my promise. (The crunching was making it hard to hear the show, anyway.)

WHAT. A. FINALE.

Holy hell, the hits just kept on coming. First we discover Dan and Serena did a little lip-locking, then Jenny sells out her own bro in some evil plot to get Nate to love her perhaps we should send her a copy of “He’s Just Not That Into You”?), then Blair finds Jenny in Brooklyn and does probably the meanest thing she’s ever done.

“Nate loves Serena, Dan loves Vanessa, Chuck loves me, but you, no one loves you.” (Or something like that. I was too busy guffawing to really write the quote down.)

Buuuurn, Jenny.
But we’ll come back to that.

Anyways, Blair realizes she does want to be with Chuck, Dorota goes into labor (I won’t question why the entire UES showed up for that, or why Serena was dressed like a hooker [a gorgeous hooker, mind you] when she did), Blair leaves Dorota and takes Chuck up on his offer to meet at the top of the Empire State Building. In neon green shoes. OK, I get that they were Louboutin but NEON GREEN, Blair? Really?

When she gets to the top, Chuck isn’t there. Cue the tears/sneaking a cookie.

Meanwhile, across town, the biggest, most ridonkulous moment in Gossip Girl history is brewing. Jenny Humphrey and her split ends and Chuck Bass and his glass of scotch sit together on the couch. JENNY HUMPHREY AND CHUCK BASS START KISSING. JENNY HUMPHREY AND CHUCK BASS DO THE DIRTY!!

What. The. F**K? How can it be that anyone can come up with Chuck’s apartment at the hotel without being announced? Jenny did it, Blair did it, Georgina Sparks did it. You’d think homeboy would have more security. But that’s not the point. Back to JENNY AND CHUCK. OMG OMG OMG.

I understand why Chuck did it; he’s Chuck Bass.
I understand why Jenny did it; what Blair said resonated with her, she was lonely and just wanted to be with someone.
I just don’t understand why any of this surprised her. She was losing her virginity to Chuck Bass; was she expecting him to profess his love and invite her to move into the hotel with him?  Was it really finding the ring (the big, perfect, gorgeous ring) that he bought for Blair that made her realize it was just sex?

More importantly, does Jenny have any idea how scary she looks when she’s crying with all that makeup on?

I hate Jenny more than ever now and I can’t wait for her to slum it out in Podunk Town, New York. I’d rather have Georgina and her baby (which I’m sure isn’t Dan’s baby, but is there a real baby in there at all?) than even catch Eric skyping with Jenny. She ruined my perfect Chuck/Blair moment.  She hurt Chuck, the only person who still remotely cared about her. Did you see that look on his face? Yup, the tears started once again. Immediately followed by more cookies.

I think that hurt me more than my own most recent break up. Sad? Probably, but it’s not like I was dating Chuck Bass. It was more like I was dating a Justin Bobby.

And if that wasn’t enough, Chuck gets SHOT? And I’m just supposed to sit with that for four months until the show returns in the fall? Cue the sobs.

Those Gossip Girl writers really know how to pull a finale together. If The Bachelorette wasn’t starting next week, I’d be checking myself into a mental institution right now. Let the countdown to Gossip Girl’s return begin.