Ready to see this guy's hockey stick?

Are you getting pumped about Levi Johnston’s upcoming full-frontal spread in Playgirl?

Wait, what’s that? You just threw up in your mouth a little?

Levi might be conventionally attractive, but his status as Bristol Palin’s baby-daddy, Jon Gosselin’s new buddy – Michael Lohan must be green with envy – and an all-around jerk (in response to New York Magazine asking him how he was adjusting to life in the Big Apple, Levi said, “I run this city. It ain’t no thang.” UGH) means that we’re less than excited about the idea of having naked pictures of this asshat plastered all over the internet next week.

After giving the matter some thought, we realized that there are actually only five guys that we’d be even more opposed to seeing in their birthday suits. Read the list if you dare—the thought of these dudes naked might just make you shudder. Read More »

The Jonas Brothers are NOT breaking up, OK?

Fight the flu naturally!

What exactly is going on here?

Is Josh Duhamel a cheater??

Miley’s got some freaky-ass fans.

What makes a man bad in bed?

Kevin Jonas and Danielle Deleasa’s wedding arrangements are still in the works, but Kevin has already taken the lead on his own bachelor party. Best men Joe and Nick are lending a helping hand in planning their brother’s last night as a ladies man. I can only imagine what a JoBro bachelor party would look like.

But if I had to guess, I imagine it would go something like this:

They start off at a Build-a-Bear workshop where the brothers and friends gather to make cuddly mementos of Kevin and Danielle’s love. Inevitably, one of Kevin’s cheesier friends will make him his own wedding day Love Bug. That one will definitely take its place at the foot of Kevin and Danielle’s marital bed.

Joe and Nick have already confirmed that they’re forgoing the typical Las Vegas trip in exchange for something much cooler. I imagine they are chartering a private jet to Disney World where they will dine in style at Cinderella’s castle. For dessert, Minnie Mouse will pop out of a cake and give Kevin the Eskimo kiss of a lifetime. But no pictures guys, things could get wild (with Kevin drinking some sparkling apple juice) and it could be incriminating. Read More »

And we only love him more for it.

Would you let Avril Lavigne dress your children?

The future of the Jonas Brothers.

Holly Montag – almost as awful as her sis?

OMG, Lady Gaga is getting even weirder.

10 intimate sex tips from a man.

So…Kevin Jonas is engaged at the age of 21.  Who saw this coming?  I’m gonna go ahead and wave my hand wildly around in the air.  What I can’t figure out is how he did it.  I mean, how do you even walk in pants that tight, much less get down on one knee to propose?  And were his brothers there?  Is a Jonas brother marriage like a Jonas Brothers song – involving all three members?

I can just imagine the scene now…Kevin Jonas walks up to the front door of his girlfriend’s house, tells his body guards to get back in the limo and drive around the corner, and knocks on the door.  She answers, he gets down on one knee, pulls out a ring, and then the music starts…because his brothers are obviously strategically placed in his girlfriend’s house to add back-up vocals.

I can’t get your smile out of my mind
(I can’t get you out of my mind)
I think about your eyes all the time
You’re beautiful but you don’t even try
(You don’t even, don’t even try)
Modesty is just so hard to find

Now I’m speechless
Over the edge, I’m just breathless
I never thought that I’d catch this love bug again
Hopeless, head over heels in the moment
I never thought that I’d get hit by this love bug again Read More »

Abstinence and sex education was a hot-button issue in our recent election.  It was also a funny and ironic topic, considering the events that played out.  The Republican party was making grand speeches about abstinence-only education and the virtues of waiting until marriage (a la The Jonas Brothers) while Bristol Palin was out getting knocked up.  Hah.  Apparently she doesn’t watch Jon & Katie Plus 8 (or do any babysitting), ’cause that pretty much closes up shop downtown for me.

As long as people continue having sex before marriage, there will be people trying to stop them.  The best part about this (well, the only good part, actually) is the advertising.  Here are the Top 5 Funniest Abstinence Ads Ever. If these don’t make you want to change your sexy ways, I’m not sure what will:

I always knew deep down that engineers could never get laid, and now I know it’s true:

Read More »

Now that Kate’s not around, he has a chance to say something.

Whose high school pics are these?

Best and worst schools for a kegger.

What is ear candling?

Sandra Bullock looks super fine on the cover of Glamour.

WTF is Joe Jonas doing?

When I was in middle school and I had to choose between two boys who wanted to take me to the 7th grade dance, my mom told me to make a list. (Mind you, that was the last time I ever had 2 boys fighting over me…) After noting that one of the boys had far more cons (like picking his nose…and eating it), I had my answer. Since then, I’ve used lists to make all of my difficult life decisions: beer or vodka, Kris Allen or Adam Lambert, flats or wedges…

And now: which celeb is worse for the future of society.

This week’s showdown is between two ladies who are tainting our youth, one racy photo at a time: Lindsay Lohan and Miley Cyrus. Who is wreaking more havoc? Let’s break it down: Read More »

Jennifer Aniston opens up to Elle UK.

Nick Schuyler, one of the missing boaters has been found!

How does the stimulus plan affect students?

Lindsay Lohan is rotting from the inside out.

In case you were wondering, here are some fun fart facts. Don’t worry; we won’t tell anyone.

Octomom gets a reality show.

Students speeding up undergrad to save money.

Stoner tries to smoke his cat in a bong. Yes, for real.

We heart cropped sweaters.

Even the nice guys aren’t calling back anymore?!

Pink goes Green.

No one wants to see the Jonas Brothers in 3-D?

He’s sorry. Well, that’s good to know.

Is Salma Hayek married?

Get help paying for college without going broke.

M.I.A. has a little boy.

The Jonas Brothers’ promise rings were bullsh*t!

Who is “that guy“?!

Kate Hudson adds a little something special to her bathroom.

It’s still cold out there. Ideas for cute winter outfits.

Obama and Lincoln have never looked so…delicious.

Add a little color to your drab winter wardrobe.

Is Patrick Swayze smoking??

Our latest obsession: Snuggie Sightings.