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Working neon into your wardrobe

In defense of PDA

Um…what happened to JWOWW?

Cee Lo Green’s new music video starring Urkel

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No Sue Sylvester in the 3D Glee movie??!!

Call the Fashion Police

Are mini wedges the best shoe this summer?

Look what you can do with photoshop!  This is why you need to enter

The 5 worst types of neighbors

The ladies of the 17th century were way more hardcore than you

This JWoww news will HORRIFY YOU

10 spring bags that won’t break the bank

Behind the scenes of Hollywood’s latest girl power action flick

If they remade When Harry met Sally (seriously hilarious!)

Blissfully unaware that you are ORANGE

The morning after…

The ten types of sex dreams

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The Olsens are BACK in the news

Um, yeah, Russian Fashion Week looks weirddd

Let’s just say, we were all very, very excited about this episode. We all saw the clip of Sammi Psycho… I mean, Sweetheart, punching Ron-Ron square in his nasty mouth. We were at the edge of our seats waiting for her to leave or some big, climactic blowout…that ended with her leaving So did it happen? You be the judge of this week’s J. Shore Fairy tale.

Once Upon a Time, we are brought back to the greasy, dirty (city? town? state?) Kingdom of Long Island (why God, why?)… the land of disasters and stolen beds. Our heroines, Snookers and JWoww are raiding what Tom’s left in the house. Stealing a BED? Chop his nuts off, Snook! The princesses collect Jenni’s 17 fluffy puppies and bring them back to the Sleazeside Heights Palace.

Amidst all this, Ryder (who should be on the show instead of Deena) arrives before Snooki. Vinny answers the door and it’s “awkward” since he was caught by Miss Snooki fornicating with her bestie. He reminds us of what Snook heeded him: “Do not have sex with my best friend.” Conflicted, Vinny responds, “I don’t know what to do at this point…” Uh, how about don’t have sex with her best friend? The Dragon Deenasaur decides to play Fake Snooki so she and Rrrrryder claim that 11 AM is the new happy hour and down shots of all sorts of mystical elixirs.

Since it is Ryder’s 22nd birthday, what better place to celebrate the momentous occasion than Club Karma, the finest ballroom scene in the land of New Jersey. Deenasaurus dons a tiara made of plastic flowers and ”my friend Bjork” (aka JWoww) looks like a castoff from the Swan Queen: Asbury Park Edition. Ronald succumbs to his fatal last words to “Mike’s girlfriend, “Lemme see you get krunk,” and Sammi flies off into a fit of jealous rage, scowling with her ceiling eyes in full force. Attractive. Read More »

Other than, “OH YEAH, EVERGLADES, YEAH” it was really difficult for me to take anything away from last night’s episode of Jersey Shore. Are we seriously dealing with a finale right now? I would’ve rather been watching South Park’s ripoff of the Jersey cast…. a la beast Snooki screaming “SNOOKI WANT SMOOSH SMOOSH!”

Seriously, the Everglades? How funny is it to confuse a crocodile with an alligator? Although I will admit the added dinosaur noises (and I don’t mean the ones coming from Sammi) to the whole Everglades event with the alligator attacking the airboat were amusing. And I don’t doubt that the bugs are bigger than Snooki….

And then the crew headed back for South Beach, after the frog-legs incident, and things took a turn for the boring. Read More »

Last night’s episode of the Jersey Shore finally put the last nail in the Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino coffin. Oh well, at least he has mad cooking skills to compete in Top Chef. I personally was heartbroken watching him go from house Papa Bear to ultimate entitled creepshow. From kicking out girls to cockblocking “the world” to parking wherever he damn well pleases, he was the biggest embarrassment to the episode.

Not to mention, our blessed jewel Ryder left Snooki and left us pulling our Ed Hardy trucker hats over our eyes and weeping for a better life in Poughkeepsie. Wahhhh, I’m so sad my all-expense paid trip to Miami doesn’t measure up!

The real only way to sum up the episodes is through the top quotes of the night. Read More »

And maybe says a little too much….

Get out of the gym and get in shape the FUN WAY.

Check out JWoww in her natural habitat.

7 chic blazers for under $70!

Not everyone wants to be on Glee…

Rushing into a relationship? Don’t.

Wanna win some Havaianas?

Justin Bieber TOTES has a gf.

"Let's all play with our hair and brush our eyebrows for awhile. GIRL TIME!"

Was I watching an episode of Jersey Shore or “Antiques Roadshow” last night? It was hard to tell due to the fact that the show was so dull I almost felt like checking to see what was on PBS. No offense to you PBS, but you’re not exactly bringing in the fist pumps every week.

We’re all so very glad that Angelina has moved out and on but to be quite honest, the show was just not as entertaining. It was like she was the Herb Brooks or, for a more relateable reference, the Heidi Montag. She provided an outlet for everyone to hate on, and without her in the house, they start directing their hate towards each other… and the show plunged into mundane drama. The Situation was revealed as an ultimate scumbucket, Sammi got more airtime playing with her eyebrow and avoiding eye contact with Jenni, and Vinny’s Miami Love Story was the main plot point.

Of course, we were all relieved when Pauly D would burst out in his deranged Kool-Aid man voice, “OH YEAH, CHAMPAGNE, YEAH!!!” but that still didn’t quite cut it.

I’m not saying I miss Angelina, but I wasn’t impressed with this episode and her lack of presence definitely showed the negative traits of our beloved J.Shore cast. Below, please follow along as I detail the reasons why this episode was a warzone epic fail. Read More »

Everyone raise your glasses for I would like to make a toast!

Today marks the 140th birthday of our good and loyal friend, Vaseline.  Here is to all of those good times we’ve had when we’ve needed you most. I keep you by my bed, in my bag, and in the car. I pick you up, dip my finger in your gooey residue and primp and prime to my utmost pleasure. You’re cheap, you’re handy, and you’re my BFF.

Cheers.

Seriously, after finding out it was Vaseline’s 140th birthday today, I went to find my own container and rubbed that shiz all over my elbows in celebration. This stuff is the best and, like any cheap vodka, it’s a college girl’s BFF.

Why, you ask?  Let us list the ways.

1. It makes your eyelashes grow: As long as you aren’t shacking up with the cutie you’ve been studying with, lather Vaseline all over your purty eyelashes overnight and watch them thicken and grow like a Chia pet come morning!

2. To Soften your weines [pronounced: wee*niss]: Vaseline is a great pick-me-up for dry elbows.

3. To Pimp out your cuticles: Store a mini-Vaseline container in your purse and utilize for emergency dry cuticle moments. And if you just really want an excuse to not take notes in lecture.

Read More »

Let me just open with a bold statement: Ron and Sammi need to get off my television, ASAP. Their negativity is clogging up the screen and prohibiting Snooki from getting her fist pump on. Seriously, get these two epic losers off of MTV before I JWoww their whiny behinds.

Also, another note about “JWowwing,” can we just point out that the only reason we were watching last night’s episode was to see JWoww take a b*tch down and it didn’t happen until the last 30 seconds of the show? Then we were left hanging with absolutely no previews to get excited about for next week? Low blow, J.Shore. This week’s episode left a lot unanswered, gentle viewers. Let’s recap all the questions that ran through our minds last night. Read More »