The other night my mom called me to ask about some singer (“GooGoo? FaFa?”) that was performing on TV with “panty hose on OVER her thong! I could see her butt!” I kindly explained to my mother that her name is Lady Gaga (“Mother, it’s Gaga. GAGA!!”) and that maybe that was just a costume for that particular performance.

But then I went online to avoid listening to my boring Physics lecture to check out some of Lady Gaga’s jams and realized that this girl really hates wearing pants. I mean, she never wears them. Not just for performances – never. Not on the streets, not at parties… ne-ver. It’s like that bad Britney phase.

I mean, the girl has killer legs, but this is a little O.O.C. (Out of control, people; keep up!) She’s getting dangerously close to camel-toe land. I swear, “Just Dance” should be called “Just (Take Off Your Pants and) Dance,” or “Just Dance With Your Goodies Hanging Out.” Although those wouldn’t have quite the same ring.

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