[You got a question for our Dude? Email him: askthedude@collegecandy.com. He'll be answering your questions every week!]

Dear Dude,
I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 11 months now. We started off really well, getting to know each other and enjoying time with the other for the first month or so. For the following two months after that, not so much due to my getting extremely ill and his graduating college and traveling for a month. He came and visited me while I was recovering and we talked everyday either on the phone or skype while he was traveling. When he came back though, that’s when the fights started.

On my 22nd birthday he left my party due to an uncomfortable conversation between my friends and him without telling me what was going on. I had friends coming in from out of town to meet him and his leaving before they got there really upset me, and his lying about leaving made me more upset. Now, after our latest blow up, which involved ignoring my calls and not talking to me with out any warning, I’m wondering if he is ready to be in a relationship. He has told me he wants to be with me and he cares about our relationship, but I feel that he has no respect for me. My friends say he and I should break up, but I remember when I was sick and how none of them were there for me. He was, though, which is why I am having such a hard time with this. Read More »

I have never been good at being alone. For me, loneliness = boredom = depression. I like to be surrounded by people, whether they’re friends, family, or my boyfriend. But right now, my boyfriend lives on the other side of the country, my friends are all home for the summer, and my family is hours away. And I’m starting to realize that being alone doesn’t mean you have to be lonely.

If you’re finding yourself alone a lot lately (maybe you moved to a new city for school/work, just went through a break up, fought with your friends, whatever) here are some tips to fight off the loneliness.

Read
Get lost in a good book. My favorites this summer have been The Time Traveler’s Wife, God-Shaped Hole, and Never Let Me Go. Books can be expensive, so find a library, put in a long list of holds, and make it a goal to read each book before the next one becomes available. Read More »

As someone who’s spent a majority of their college career in an LDR, only spending summers and holidays with my guy, I consider myself an expert in the intricacies of the dreaded time apart. Are you thinking of starting one as you and your warm-weather fling get ready for separate schools next fall? Answer the following Q’s to see if you have what it takes!

Drinkin’
When you get drunk, is it impossible for you to keep the flirting to a minimum? Do your beer goggles often lead you to bring guys back for some late night noshing and nooky after the bars?

Do you think that “making out” with a rando is okay as long as it only happens once and you can’t really remember it the next morning?

BFFs
Are you jealous of your girlfriends who are in relationships? If your roommate was sleeping at her boyfriend’s house every night, would you wallow in depression knowing that your boyfriend was miles away?

Read More »

[I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the epitome of prim and proper- heck, who really is nowadays? But looking around at the misguided youths of today *ahem drinking buddies*, I’m starting to think that Miss Manners might have been onto something.

While you may never need to know how to greet a duke or how to tell which fork is REALLY the oyster fork, knowing how to deal with people whom owe you money, how much to tip, and how to address the ever annoying licorice-in-teeth conundrum without being rude might actually come in handy in the real world. I'm not trying to be your mother - oh goodness, no - I'm just here to help you out of those little etiquette dilemmas. So here goes: a quick lesson in etiquette. The sh*t you might actually need to know.]

I love sleepovers. They are always so reminiscent of fifth grade slumber parties when, for one whole night, you and your BFF would stay up eating sundaes and talking about your favorite N*Sync member (<3 Lance).

Anyway, I still love sleepovers. Only now there are no sundaes (because we all know what happens when we scarf down a pound of ice cream at midnight), my beloved Lance is gay (in hindsight, I probably should have seen that coming), and the friend sleeping over part usually lasts waayyyy longer than just one night. Sometimes, the friend stays for weeks and instead of it being the super fun party you remembered, it kind of… sucks. I can’t complain though, I’ve done it myself – once I spent the entire summer at a friend’s while my house was being remodeled. So given the response to my last cheat sheet, I’ve decided to make another one: Miss Manner’s guide to being a good house guest… Read More »

Ok, tonight’s episode of The City was….good. Really good. Chock full of the drama that I have come to expect from the MTV not-so-reality shows. It was so good, in fact, that it actually made me excited to watch next week. And if you’ve been following my recaps you will know that is saying a lot.

What made it so good? Well, for one, JR. He’s not so cute when he smiles, but he does seem to be the only real person on the show. And by “real” I mean “someone who leaves SoHo/Grammercy once in awhile and has a real job.” He’s totally smitten with Erin and her I-totally-just-smoked-a-ton-of-pot vibe and wines and dines her in attempts to woo her back.

Meanwhile Erin is telling anyone who will listen (even in the middle of a concert) that she is falling for him and even goes as far as telling the girl with the nose (Samantha?) that she just can’t make the whole long distance thing with her Canadian lover work. Read More »

Got a question? Get an answer! Email her at tuffylove@collegecandy.com to be featured in her column, which runs every other Tuesday!

Dear Tuffy Luv,

I go to school out of state about an 8 hour drive from home. What should I do about a long term relationship? Should I have one at my home state or my school state? And how do I keep up with either one when I’m in the other state?

Long Distance Lover

Dear Long Distance Lover,

Really, really good question.

I guess the only answer I can honestly give you (and it’s annoying, I know) is that you should take love where you find it.

It is this girl’s opinion that love is not something you can force. If you meet a guy at school who you like but there’s someone you love at home–well, how can you give up love for like? The same is true in reverse: If there’s a guy you like at home but a guy you love at school, you should go for the love. Read More »

Okay, okay. You found your fling. But classes are about to begin again, and you’ve got to pack up, move out, and put your scholar-face on. What are you going to do about the amazing hottie you picked up over the break?

Well, that all depends. What do you want? What does he want? How much do you really think you click? And by “click,” I do NOT mean another work that ends in “-ck.” Because if you’re going to make it work, you’re going to have to jive beyond the boundaries of physical attraction.

Take into consideration the fact that you’re going to have a college workload, assignments, deadlines, and the usual university-sponsored (or bar-sponsored) social engagements. If he’s in school, he will too. Sure, it was easy to escape when you were both visiting your parents, but what about when you’ve got your uber-fun roommate and a dorm full of friends every night of the week? If you still think he’s worth it, read on. Read More »

For those of us in long distance relationships, or those of us are not near our significant others during this long winter break, it can be hard to keep in touch sexually when we can’t physically get it on. My guy and I are over 700 miles apart and recently found a fun and kinky way to keep ourselves occupied.

And it involves a cellular.

Yes, the topic is taboo and everyone feels all weird about it, but phone sex is a great way to stay close in a relationship even when you’re miles apart.

While some may be too shy to start talking dirty over the phone lines, I have a few tips to keep in mind when trying out phone sex.

First off, relax!! (Editor’s Note: A glass of wine may help…) Phone sex is something to have fun with, not get all worried about. If you’re nervous, just try thinking of what would happen if your partner was actually there. Take a deep breath and ask something general such as, “What would you do to me if you were here?” This might be easier to say then just asking “Wanna have phone sex?” because you end up taking the pressure off of yourself to start the convo, making him answer first instead. Read More »

Phone sex. One of those taboos that’s so great, people are willing to pay $5.99 a minute just to get some. Of course, if you’re in a relationship, you can get it for free. But you haven’t, have you? Sure, phone sex might seem awkward at first, but under certain circusmtances, it can satisfy the carnal needs of you and your partner.What’s the big deal with phone sex, you ask. I mean, sure, I prefer a quality hump to a Cingular-shag, but sometimes, you’re horny and physical contact isn’t an option.

I lost my phone sex virginity when I was in a long-distance relationship. Actually, we were having phone sex long before we had actual intercourse, because my track record was a lot longer than my man’s and I was trying to be a “good girl” and take things slow, or some bullsh*t like that.

Anyway, you know all the fluff and butterflies that come when you have a new crush, or even better, a new boyfriend. I was really into this guy. I wanted him. Bad. But I was buried with school work, and wouldn’t be able to visit him for a week or two. One night, I called him, half in the bag and 100% horny. Obviously, the alcohol lowered my inhibitions, and I started talking dirty, telling him how much I wanted him…and the next thing I knew, BAM! Phone sex. Read More »

Listen clearly: I don’t want this to discourage you girls in LDRs or in any relationship for that matter, but something happened to me that is absolutely mortifying and humiliating and just unbelievable.

I’m the girl that was in an on-and-off relationship with a guy for eight years. Eight years. Eight long years of ups and downs, break ups, makeup sex, happy times, sad times, etc. He was my best friend. This year things changed a bit; I started college and he moved across the country. But we knew we’d be ok; we lasted this long didn’t we?

Before I left for school I visited him for three wonderful weeks. It was all lovey dovey and perfect. He was constantly telling me tat he loved me like he has for eight years, and we were going to get married, and blah blah blah.

When I got to college (about a month ago), I realized how much I disliked the school and told him how I wanted to go to New York next semester. He was really supportive and reminded me I could always transfer out there. Awww.

And then I didn’t hear from him for a few days. And then a few more days went on without contact. So I started to freak out. When I finally got a hold of him he told me we were fine, he missed me and loved me, and not to worry. So I didn’t; I figured we were back to normal.

But apparently we weren’t. No phone calls, no texts. He didn’t answer my calls or my texts. I was being ignored. I sent a long text explaining that he should want to talk to me because I was his girlfriend, and we needed to talk things out. I told him how I wasn’t mad (even though I was furious), and I just wanted to talk to my boyfriend. No answer. I got drunk (great solution to everything, eh?) and ended up calling fifteen times and sending four texts (according to my call log). Again, no answer. Read More »