This has led me to some contemplation on how hard it actually is to make a move on someone, and how annoying and awkward it can be while you’re waiting for them to make a move on you.

We’ve all been in way too many situations where we’ve been talking to a cute boy all night, but the party’s dying down and we can’t tell if he’s gonna pack up his things and head home (alone), or pucker up his lips and go in for the kiss (or, you know, put his hand on our butt…something!). And you know he’s feeling just as anxious, because he can’t tell if he should risk making the move too soon and scaring you off.

So you just sorta stand there…talking about cheese.

Of course, as Weezer exemplifies, this situation can easily be reversed. And I’m all for that. It’s time to stomp out the awkwardness of making/waiting for a move. It’s time to take matters into our own hands, and to take those matters with confidence and ease.

How can you let him/her know you’re ready?

Physical Contact. Touch his shoulder as you’re talking, or let yourself get pushed close to him in a crowded room. Taking advantage of any excuse to touch him will get those hormones pumping!

Privacy. Any thinly veiled excuse to leave the crowded party or bar (“I’d love a house tour! Which room is yours?”) should give off the hint that you’re ready to take it up a notch.

Where did my friends go? Losing your friends offers a great opportunity for him to offer to walk you home, and for you to invite him inside to “warm up.” Of course, make sure you have cab fare in case he doesn’t get the hint.

Tired of waiting? Tried all those things and homeboy still isn’t going in for the kill? Make the move yourself.

Just Kiss Him Already. If the tension is there, taking the plunge and just kissing him is the best way to get started. If he’s into it, you’ll be a hero. If you misread the situation and he has a girlfriend or something, well, at least you have a story to submit to CollegeCandy’s Morning After column.

Yeah, it will sting for a little while, but at least you tried. That’s more than you can say for most people!

But I get really frustrated when there’s someone I like, and I’m pretty sure likes me back, and he just won’t make a goddamn move.

These days, before I even consider taking the plunge and asking out a guy, I prefer to employ all sorts of subtle tactics (that I think are blaringly obvious, of course) in the hopes that he’ll get the hint — like, um, talking to him, giving him my phone number, smiling a lot, and making sure he has my phone number entered correctly in his phone. Once I’ve maxed out those, though, with no profit return, I wonder if it’s time to give up — or take a ride on the egalitarian waterslide. Because, I keep telling myself, some guys are really immature. Some guys are scared. Some guys are intimidated by strong, confident, accomplished, beautiful women.

But seriously, do I have to do EVERYTHING? I’n not sure which is better anymore: asking a guy out and subjecting myself to his subsequent emasculation or sitting at home, brooding with my genderless friends Oreo and Law and Order. There’s no way to win. Overconfident guys usually turn out to be sleazebags, and the underconfident ones are kittens, neither of which I want to date. Whatever happened, though, to the art of subtle flirtation, the exciting buildup of complimentary banter, between a guy and girl? I need to know before I invest in a skywriter.