You can imagine why I had to hide this cover from my dad...

If I were to understand what guys need advice on via Maxim magazine, there would be three things; grilling, telling jokes, and this month, ‘what to do if you’re approached by a hot woman or a bear.”  Golf-clap to you Maxim – job well done.

I purchased my monthly edition of the saucy mag this month and was bombarded by articles about steaks and coal-fire grills. And all of the men out there listening? When approached by a bear, offer it food. But when approached by a woman? Offering it food ain’t such a good idea.

While reading it inside of a Glamour magazine to block the Maxim cover from my father, I came upon many other intriguing articles. One in particular went on a hateful rant about ‘Why Summer Sucks.’ I couldn’t believe someone could possibly be shunning summertime. Needless to say, I was intrigued and read on.  The number one summer complaint? Scantily clad females. Why? Because “they never talk to you and you have to stare at their minimum clothed bodies anyway.”  Does this man realize he is complaining about partially nude woman that never complain/whine/talk?!  That’s news to me, bud.

Other articles featured were ‘How to Cook in a Bachelor Pad Fridge,’ and ‘Oregon Trail 2.0′ (a Maxim atlas full of places to conduct the gnarliest of gnarly road trips).  One article even gave men advice about how to have a proper summer fling.  The article was pretty right on, not that summer flings are rocket science. Maxim was having a modest trip so far – I was even debating letting this mag sit on my family coffee table after its use.

And then a lovely little article birthed itself from the Maxim pages.  That’s right, we were lucky enough to be given an article titled, ‘The Maxim Porn Dictionary.’  This article defined many pornarific items anyone should be scared to admit they utilize. Beyond defining ‘pedal pumping,’ this article had a lot more to offer.  Like how to navigate and use the terms. This is going to be good weird. Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can't scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Dear Dude,
For the first time since 8th grade, I’m single. This is great right? It gives me a chance to explore, experiment and really get to know myself and it turns out I’m pretty cool.

Awesome, except all of my guy friends seem to think that I should experiment with them. And it extends beyond that; guys I meet at in class, at parties or even at work all only want to date or hook up. When I explain that I just want to be friends (and mean it!) they basically stop talking to me.

Is it me? Am I only interesting when sex is on the table? After eight years of being someone or another’s girlfriend, I would really like to just be me. Does this mean I have to sacrifice guy friends to avoid a boyfriend?

Signed,
Single and Staying That Way Read More »

Hey Dude,

How the heck do you get out of the friend zone? It seems like everyone thinks it is only a problem for guys but girls go through the same problem as well. I have a guy friend for a few years now and I would love for it to be something more. He is a definition of a player and basically can get whoever he wants. He hooks up with so many girls – he even hooked up with my twin sister last week!

The thing is, we have a good friendship – he makes me laugh and I feel like I can tell him anything. We are very flirty, but then again, he flirts with everyone. We have been in situations where we could of hooked up, but he never made a move. He is not friends with many girls. Honestly, I think I am the closest girlfriend he
has. I just really would love to see if I can turn this into something more. Help!!

-Sick of the Friend Zone Read More »

Got a guy question that’s tearing you up inside? Don’t trust your girl friends to give you honest advice (because they’re afraid if they tell you the truth you will freak out and throw things at them)? Just want to try and understand what a guy is thinking?

We’ve got the dude for you. Send your questions to AskTheDude@CollegeCandy.com and he’ll give it to you straight. Because you can’t throw things at him, no matter what he tells you. Our dude is answering questions every Wednesday, so ask away!

Hey Duuuude,

OK, so here is my situation. I met this guy my freshman year of college (I’m a sophomore now) and we flirted for a while and then we started texting. Then eventually, we started partying together. Well for about two months while we would flirt, text and party all the time (he would text me every day about 3 times a day a lot of times just to see what I was doing), he had a girlfriend. Before I found this out, I had straight up asked him if he had a girlfriend and he said no.

How I found out he had a girlfriend for sure, was one night us two and a group of friends went to a party. At the party (not knowing it was his girlfriend) I went up and talked to her, because I knew who she was aside from the fact that she was his girlfriend. She was short with me, and gave me a lot of attitude and I wanted to know why. So I asked him again what was going on between those two and he simply said “I f**ked her a few times.” Then I found out that she is madly in love with him and considers them to be exclusive. Well that was a while ago and bygones are bygones; I do not trust him in a boyfriend sense, yet I treasure his friendship. He tells me he wants to go out on actual dates that don’t involve other people and black out-drunkenness, and I have heard him say that he wants to be in a serious relationship with me, but I am afraid to trust him because I feel like he is someone that I could really fall for.

What should I do???
— Can’t Think of a Fun Name, So Just Call Me Confused Read More »

I’m going to make a bold statement here: pretty people have it pretty easy in life.

Well, at least when it comes to dealings with the opposite sex. I watch guys trip over themselves to get near a hot girl with big boobs, yet I find myself breaking a sweat trying to prove to the same guys that I’m worth a moment of their time.

I don’t mind this – I love showing people how awesomely funny I am – but it does irk me when I see the “perfect” girls coasting through life without lifting a finger. WTF, pretty people? How is that fair? I’m just as worthy, if not more, of the same things you get in life, yet you get them handed to you on a silver platter and I have to pass some sort of test just to get a taste?

I wanted to see what my male counterparts had to say about this subject. Do they know they’re doing this? Do they deal with it too? Let’s see…. Read More »

Last week one of the CollegeCandy writers asked a question that I have been thinking about since I started crushing on boys in the 4th grade: would you date someone who weighs less than you?

Many people weighed in (tee hee) on the topic via the comments, and most of them seemed angry that we even brought up the issue. I mean, weight shouldn’t matter! But I really felt that a lot of people were missing the point.

This is not a question of body image or beauty, but rather a question of comfort, societal expectations and the role of men and women in a relationship. I was curious to see if weight was something guys considered when dating someone (beyond the whole preference for a girl with big boobs and a negative waist).

And based on what this guy said, I think weight and size matter more than most people are willing to admit. Read More »

We all know that women tend to be a little more emotional than men, but when it comes to break ups, shouldn’t everyone be a little hurt? Shouldn’t both parties be at least a little emotional?

Why then does it always seem like the guys are moving on so much faster? While we sit home and watch sad movies and listen to sad music as our friends force feed us, our guys are out at the bar with their friends picking up chicks and having a grand ole’ time.

How can they get over it so quickly? Are girls – even serious girlfriends – that disposable and easy to move on from? I asked one of my boys for the lowdown. His perspective may not make you feel better, but it does explain a lot. Read More »

Guys are confusing little creatures. Just when you think you found yourself a good one, he does something weird and shady and breaks your heart. Or your spirit. Or your faith in men in general.

Like that time he told you he’d be studying all night and you found him cozying up to some bitch at the bar. Or when he told you he really liked you…but just didn’t want a relationship. Or even before you get serious with a guy and he says he’s gonna call and never, ever does!

WTF is up with that? Are guys cowards, or just a**holes (or both)? I needed to know – because my ego was seriously bruised – so I asked one of my boys for the dish.

Here is his explanation for men worldwide: Read More »