[We ladies spend a lot of time wondering what guys are thinking, most often over stiff drinks or soupy ice cream. Unfortunately, besides The Dude, we don't often get the chance to really find out. So we continue speculating, wondering and growing more and more self-conscious by the minute. Not anymore. CollegeCandy's got a new guy in town who is going to open up his man brain and enlighten us as to what exactly goes on in there. Prepare yourselves, girls; I have a feeling this is going to be an interesting ride.]

Just like a psychic that can tell your future with Tarot cards or your palm, guys can tell a lot about a woman by the kind of drink she is having at a bar. And just like those crappy psychics with crystal balls, guys are often full of sh*t too, but here goes.

Note: I am using the bar as a setting rather than a house or frat party because it offers up more variety. The only variety you get at college parties is not what you’re drinking, but how you’re downing that Natty Light: upside down, through a funnel, or the traditional red cup. At your local bar, however, you can see everything from your down-to-earth non-light beer drinkers to the seemingly high-maintenance Cosmopolitan drinkers. Can both of these women be the same person on different nights? Sure, but not likely. Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can't scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Dear Dude,
For the first time since 8th grade, I’m single. This is great right? It gives me a chance to explore, experiment and really get to know myself and it turns out I’m pretty cool.

Awesome, except all of my guy friends seem to think that I should experiment with them. And it extends beyond that; guys I meet at in class, at parties or even at work all only want to date or hook up. When I explain that I just want to be friends (and mean it!) they basically stop talking to me.

Is it me? Am I only interesting when sex is on the table? After eight years of being someone or another’s girlfriend, I would really like to just be me. Does this mean I have to sacrifice guy friends to avoid a boyfriend?

Signed,
Single and Staying That Way Read More »

Dear Dude,

Honestly, are guys truly intimidated by smart girls?  I’m an “A” student with glasses. Yet, while I’m stuck by myself mulling over the tenets of existentialism, the ditzy girls are getting the fellows’ attention.  I’m confused.  I thought that you guys didn’t want girls to play dumb.  I’m never mean, and I while I participate in class, I do shut up.  So, what’s up with this?  Are the glasses some sort of turnoff?

Sincerely,
Ol’ Four Eyes

Read More »

Hey Dude,

I’ve done the Friends With Benefits thing, and, to say the least, I’m not cut out for it.  Now I have this amazing guy in my life who I consider my best friend, but I’m confused over how I’m supposed to know if he likes me as in a relationship sense or if he just wants to sleep with me.

He texts me quite often, even if just to say hi or to see what I’m up to, or make sure I’m feeling better when I’m sick.  We’ve gone out before with mutual friends and had a blast.  We’re both more of homebodies, so he comes over to my place now regularly and we hang out.  We’ve made out, but I end it before it goes any further because I don’t want the Friends With Benefits thing to happen.

So, how do I know?!

Thanks,
Confused Read More »

Men are tricky creatures. As much as we may wish we could read their minds, it just isn’t possible (yet… come on, science!). But don’t worry, I have discovered a trick to help us understand them a little more.

We all know guys that have picked up Cosmo from time-to-time (or have a monthly subscription) to help them figure out what their women are thinking. Hell, I bet a bunch of guys are reading CollegeCandy right now to try and figure something out about their girlfriends. Well ladies, we can do the same thing! Taking a peek at the kind of dating and relationship advice guys are being fed is a great way to get into the mind of a dude and see why he acts the way he does. Every Wednesday I’ll be doing just that. Hopefully, this will explain a few things…

This Week’s Article: “Open Up to Her?” from askmen.com.

A reader writes to Doc Love (really? Doc Love?) because he has been having problems with the woman he has been dating for 21 months. He writes: “Caprice is now saying she doesn’t know if we’re compatible. She still says she loves me and is still touchy with me (so I don’t think it’s just Womanese). One of her specific complaints is that I don’t communicate, and that she doesn’t really know me. In your book you say not to talk too much about yourself and only tell her things that will raise her Interest Level. I shut my mouth and make sure I listen, but if she asks what I think about something and I think my answer will lower Interest Level, I don’t say anything. Should I open up more?”

Doc Love’s first move is to remind the writer that he is always right. He says: “”The System” works all the time on everything. If you missed something in the Dating Dictionary or misinterpreted my techniques, then it’s not a problem with my book; it’s a problem with you. So please don’t say it only works ‘up to a point.’” Wow, way to hit that cocky ball out of the park, Doc Love. You really think you have all the dating answers? There isn’t one single situation in the whole world that the Doc Love “system” might not work for?

I’m really hating this guy already. Read More »

There are few topics in a relationship that cause more controversy than strip clubs. Many of us can’t understand why our man would need to watch some other girl strip it off and shake her ass in his face when he can have our naked ass in his face whenever he wants it (for free, I might add).  And isn’t watching some other girl get naked a form of cheating? He wouldn’t like it if I let some random dude come over and rub his crotch in (or on) my face for $5.

So why do guys do it? And what is the appeal of having some girl rub her boobs on him if he has to stick a few bucks in her panties to do so? I haven’t spent much time in strip clubs, so I turned to someone who does. Frequently. And loves it.

Here is the strip club lowdown from a dude who knows it (very) well. Read More »

We are all about independent women around here, but after one writer asked if independence could be hindering her relationship status, we began to wonder. We know that men have very fragile egos that can be shattered faster than a shot glass in a garbage disposal (those suckers fit perfectly in there!) so it seems to make sense that strong, independent women scare the bejeezus out of them.

Could guys be shying away from us out of fear that we don’t need them?

In order to ease my mind, I thought I would get some answers directly from the source. The good news is: independence isn’t a total turn-off. The bad news: we’re going to have to come up with some better reasons why guys aren’t returning our phone calls. Read More »

[The following post is courtesy of our homegirls over at YourTango. Well, their male perspective. They’ve been through it all and know just about everything about love, so we thought we’d bring their expertise to you. Enjoy!]  

Women, take note: when the appearance of men’s toenails suggest that we are either vying for a Guinness World Record—or preparing for an underground cage fighting match—feel free to mention that they’ve gotten a tad long. We don’t mind.

In fact, shame might be the only way for us to remember to clean ourselves up.

Hygiene is not something we consciously avoid—it’s just one of the many stumbling blocks in life. In fact, we may not even be aware that we’re the guy who everyone thinks smells like wet dog. But if your man is great at shaving and rinsing, you’ll find an off-hand compliment from the woman in his life is often the reason. Read More »

Remember that Sex and the City episode when Miranda meets that guy at a Weight Watchers meeting? They head back to her place and get it on, but when he comes back up from downtown for a little smoochy smoochy, his face looks like it’s been dipped in donut glaze.

Vomit.

It was that episode that first instilled fear in me of kissing after a little downtown action. The whole after-oral makeout sesh grosses. me. out. But I also know many girls who will unleash the fury on their men if they don’t get a little thank you kiss when their (difficult…they don’t call it a job for nothing, right?) work is done.

Where do guys stand on this issue? We asked one… Read More »

Despite what many people say, Valentine’s Day is a lovely little holiday. Sure, we should tell our significant others what we think of them every day, but there is something nice about a day devoted solely to one another, love and romance. A day that is different from every other day on the calendar. A day that is all about doing special little things for one another.But I’m a girl and a lover of all things romantic.

What do guys think of V-Day? Do they love all the mushy romantic stuff, or is it just another unneeded pressure in their lives? Do they like trying to find the perfect gift for their ladies, or are they only doing it to get laid?

And what about the single dudes? How do they feel about this lovey-dovey day?

I turned to my dude-with-all-the-answers to get a guy’s perspective on Valentine’s Day. Read More »