Wowza! This week has been quite the whirlwind.

Is Lindsay going to jail? Does she think it’s totally unfair and tell everyone via her Twitter ramblings?
Is Mel Gibson even more crazy than we thought?

Yes, yes, and yes! While there aren’t a ton of new developments this week, what’s been developing just keeps getting developier better. Not for the celebs so much – I mean, unless Lindsay is super geeked to wear a jumpsuit for 3 months – but for us because it gives us plenty to talk about/make fun of. Yay?

Why are celebs so stupid?

1. Lindsay Lohan has been sentenced to 90 days (or more!) in jail, rehab after that, and 1 year of random drug testing! Hooray, it’s about time! Girlfriend needs some MAY-JAH help. LiLo broke down in court, but I think it’s just her acting skills (and you can’t deny she’s a good actress). She thought she was going to get off with a slap on the wrist. Well, that’s what happens when you wear a nice F*** U manicure to court, Ms. Lohan. Get.It.Together. Lindsay has hired a new attorney and is appealing the court’s decision because she doesn’t believe her sentence is fair.

2. Poor Oksana Grigorieva. The L.A. County Sheriff’s Department is now investigating Mel Gibson for domestic violence after a recording has surfaced of Mel telling Oksana that she “f****** deserved it.” No, he wasn’t talking about some sparkly diamond bracelet he got her for being such a lovely woman; he’s, of course, referring to punching her in the face. There have been numerous recordings of Gibson making horrendous racist remarks, and this just makes it worse. We’re on Team Oksana for sure, but I think even the most vile creature on earth (Spencer Pratt?) would side with her.

3. NBA star LeBron James is joining the Miami Heat! Basketball fans sat around for hours last night waiting for the big guy to make his decision. LeBron decided to leave the Cavaliers after a disappointing season, and people have been closely watching him – while teams get on their knees and beg for him – to figure out where he’d go next. He’s joining the Heat along with Chris Bosh and Dwayne Wade. They’ll be awfully close to those Kardashians in Miami. I have a feeling Kim will be checking in on Dash a little more often now.

4. Mary J. Blige is going back to school! She got her high school diploma from New York back in the day and now she’ll be attending Howard University, class of 2014. What a great role model! Mary is 39 with a seriously successful music career, yet she’s still going to get her college degree. Props!

5. Soccer stud Cristiano Ronaldo is having a baby. From a surrogate. That he paid to keep quiet. What?! OK, totes not sure on this. Cristiano is dating model Irina Shayk who seems to have no problem with the new baby daddy situation. Some reports are suggesting that the baby mama is a woman Cristiano slept with and is paying to stay out of the picture. Some are saying it’s a surrogate. I don’t know what to believe, but congrats?

Less Stupidity

1. Rachel Dratch from SNL is having a baby! Congrats to you, funny lady!

2. Rumors flew this week that Taylor Lautner was joining the cast of X-Men… but he’s not. This makes me sad. Taylor Lautner shirtless is delicious, but Taylor Lautner in one of those rubbery suits with the sculpted abs? Wait, what was I saying?

3. Jennifer Aniston is supposedly dating actor Chris Gartin, who is almost divorced from his wife. Her reps deny it but we’re onto you, Jen! And we’re happy. He seems to be a lot better than some of those other dudes…

4. Rihanna’s tours aren’t selling out, so she’s canceling! She canceled in Atlanta and Denver, and more are likely to follow. Uh oh! I wonder why no one’s buying?

5. He’s not shirtless, but who’s more sexy than Seth Cohen aka Adam Brody?!

Maroon 5- Call and Response (The Remix Album)

While we anxiously await the release of some new music from Maroon 5 (why on Earth does it take them so long?), we can temporarily get our Adam Levine fix from Call and Response, an album of Maroon 5 remixes. The album makes me happy because it remixes the songs enough that some of them actually sound like new tracks. But it also makes me wonder if Maroon 5 desperately wants to get some play time in the clubs. Whatever the case, this whole album may be worth it just to hear the Mark Ronson “Wake Up Call” mix featuring Mary J. Blige. Not to mention, the album includes remixes with Of Montreal, Cut Copy, and Deerhoof.

If you tell me the hotness that is Adam Levine is involved, I’ll buy it, but I’m eager for something new from the boys of Maroon 5.

Brandy- Human

Wait, Brandy still exists? Didn’t she kill someone in a car accident a while back? Well, yes. But now she’s ready for her comeback and you can almost feel the pain of her past through the music in her new album, Human. The title track relays to the public how sorry she is for what we’re to assume is the accident: “I make mistakes but I can’t turn back time…I’m only human.” But despite all this pain, Brandy somehow manages to make most of the songs on the album positive and cheerful. I have to admit, I’ve been a fan of the upbeat track “Right Here (Departed)” from the first time I heard it on the radio.

Brandy may never reach her “That Boy is Mine” fame again, but she’ll definitely get some serious radio play-time.

Cat Power- Dark End of the Street EP

This EP full of more Cat Power cover songs is perfect for listening to on a cold, lonely night. Her beautiful version of Otis Redding’s “I’ve Been Loving You Too Long (To Stop Now)” caused me to hit replay over and over. Dark End of the Street is certainly not an upbeat album, but each song completely wraps you up in the beautiful crooning of her voice. Cat also covers songs by James Carr, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Sandy Denny, Aretha Franklin, and the Pogues. Some tracks don’t quite match up to the originals, but that’s OK because you may never have heard the original anyway. And what you don’t know won’t hurt you.

Cat’s back covering the classics and helping you feel a little bit more depressed…in a good way.

[All images courtesy of Amazon.com]

You know how everyone loves to pick apart celebrity outfits — and also listen to awesome music, perferably at the same time? Well, Fashion Rocks 2008 is the answer to your worst dressed / best song hankerings.

The night was full of sequins, Beyonce belting out Etta James and dueting with Justin Timberlake, Rihanna sporting some serious scary feathers, and the continuation of trend that is celebs using their time to fight cancer. Although not everyone hit a home run on the red carpet fashion department (I’m looking at both of you, Solange and Tyra), the night looked a hell of a lot better than say…the MTV VMAs. At least people, you know, took the time to attempt classiness.

After the jump, peruse through some of the night’s more famous faces and click on the pics to see even more…

This week on America’s Next Top Model, things get yummy when model Tyson Beckford comes to the house and has the girls act as spokeswomen for items in their kitchen. The word “moist” is thrown around a lot, thanks at least in part to Tyson Beckford’s presence, I’m sure.

I’m glad to see Tyra’s whole awareness and environment crusade goes further than the first episode, with both the challenge and the photo shoot spreading a good message. First, for their challenge, the girls film a public service announcement for Keep A Child Alive (they’re the ones behind the “I Am African” campaign) in teams of three. No one does particularly well, but Jenah, Ambreal, and Heather win.

Heather gets a photo shoot with Mary J. Blige, while the other two get gift baskets, which, uh, sucks.

Next up is my favorite photo shoot so far in this season (and certainly more enjoyable than the fashion gargoyle shoot last episode). This time around each girl portrays a recyclable material. Thumbs up for making recycling fashionable, Tyra! Heather, dressed up as aluminum cans, looks stunning in head-on poses and works off of last episode’s criticism of her fondness for side shots. Ambreal looks awkward, but who wouldn’t, dressed up as car parts? I can barely take a decent picture after practicing my MySpace angles in dim lighting, let alone dressed as an exhaust pipe.

It’s Ambreal and Ebony in the bottom two, and Tyra’s melodramatic and stoic process of handing out photos (seriously, the way she pulls out each photo, one by one, looks like it’s being played in slow-motion) is broken when Ebony announces she wants out. Tyra looks as disappointed as I was that she couldn’t stick it to her, but she makes up for the unceremonious cut by giving a speech about not liking quitters. Way to have the last word, Ty-Ty!

I can’t help but still love Ambreal, despite her trouble with the shoot this week. There’s something very delicate and feminine about her. I’m hoping she kicks it up a notch and joins Heather in the mental top three I’ve created (Ambreal, Heather, and Lisa, a fellow Jersey girl).

Stay tuned for more Tyra and more drama next week!

The VMA performances weren’t the only things that sucked last night – the fashion sucked, too!

Yes, there were some winners in my book – Rihanna and Alisha’s dresses were pretty kick-ass.

But seriously, guys and their trendy little shiny suits aside, the ladies showed up at the VMA’s looking like cheap, unintelliegent whores, The Statue of Libery, or some one’s super slutty grandmother.

“Edgy” award show or not, I don’t understand how women with so much money make such poor style choices.

I mean, if nothing else, stick a passifier in your mouth at least. At LEAST. Oh yea. Some one did that. Gorgeous.

See the red carpet looks after the jump.

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