There are a lot of bitchy girls, and I’ve met plenty of them. I don’t know about you, but I don’t enjoy making people feeling terrible or being so rude that all of my friends talk about me behind my back. Women who put down other women/act like they are better than other women are the most heinous of all. Because guess what, bitches? You’re not better than the rest of us.

I know that when you’re complaining to your friends about a bitch you know, they probably give you some excuse like, “Oh she’s just threatened by you” or “She must be really insecure with herself.” While those things may be true, some girls are just bitches and probably don’t have a reason for being one.

Are you afraid you may be a heinous bitch? Well fear not, my friends. Here’s how you know:

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Signs you’re a heinous bitch honorable mentions: You love three-way calling to expose people talking bad about each other; you post anonymous, bitchy comments on the internet; you’re cliquey; you talk about how much you want to cheat on your boyfriend; and you always have to get your way.

Jessica Zaleski is a journalism major finishing up her senior year at the University of Florida. She is not a heinous bitch. However, she has met plenty of heinous bitches, and she hopes they don’t read this post because Jessica hates heinous bitch confrontation. 

Note to self — “mean girls” exist well beyond both high school and college. And when they roam the streets of the real world like they’re stomping through the school hallways, they will set you up to fall into a trash can, head first, and smile about it. Heck, I even had one for a boss once. And that woman paid me way too little for the crap she put me through for her own amusement.

Since graduating last June, I bounced around a few odd jobs in order to procrastinate studying for the GRE and thinking about the rest of my life. One opportunity, a 9-to-5 office gig with an hour commute each way, had me writing content for an online lifestyle magazine. The office was chic, decorated with tons of artwork and had enough iMacs for all. Lunch was provided daily, parking was complimentary, and my co-workers were all around my age. My boss was a young female entrepreneur whose ideas were as inspiring as her fashion sense. If I was going to be doing busy work for a little while, it might as well be somewhere too good to be true, right?

At first, it was fine. The work was plentiful, the food was delicious, the commute wasn’t so bad. But then, after a few days — yes, I said days — I began to notice a few crucial red flags. Like how the boss wasn’t around as often as she should be, since most of the staff was almost as new as I was. The “veteran” of the team had only been there for two months, and she only knew so much. We often sat there, confused about our assignments, and how she wanted them. And even after calling and texting the boss repeatedly in order to prevent an unsupervised and completely wasted day of work, we would receive no response.

Of course, the next day (or sometimes, the day after that), the boss would march in with a deeply dissatisfied look on her face and a voice louder than all those ideas and outfits I once admired. She’d reprimand us for things we didn’t know we were supposed to do, for things we didn’t even know existed, for things she once said that she herself would attend do. She scolded one employee to the point that he quit the job on the spot, and then continued to complain about him long after he was out the door. And what else could we remaining team members do but nod in agreement, in fear that we’d be next?

Shortly after, I did a bit of research on my boss and her professional endeavor, and I found complaint after complaint about the job position I claimed as my own. Apparently, the opportunity had been a revolving door of writers who had simply had enough. Even more so, it turned out that our paychecks weren’t exactly rooted in revenue from subscribers or advertisers — instead, the company was backed by a handful “international investors,” or so she said. But with so many employees constantly being hired, fired, improperly trained and often confused, there’s no way we were actually getting much work done to actually move the company forward…

And then it hit me: this woman was an overgrown mean girl. She made her company appear to be an “in” crowd to us, and we were paid to be her Cady Heron’s, day in and day out. Well, on the days that Regina George was there for, anyway. And no amount of free meals or parking spots would make it okay.

As thankful as I was for the employment opportunity — hey, any job these days is hard to come by — I couldn’t just unlearn the epiphany. I resigned to a smiling face that insulted me about how I was quite unfit for the busy work job anyway. And in my head, I agreed with her — I had way too much self-respect to be leashed up all day as some mean girl’s bitch who lived for an occasional treat.

It’s not just her, though. When you think about it, “mean girls” are everywhere in the real world. They bring their unresolved high school grudges to work with them and dump them out on whoever happens to be around; they go on extreme and unjustified power trips and get away with it daily. Sometimes they’re the angry drivers on the freeway or the women in customer service who won’t process your retail return with a smile. Other times, they’re your fellow team members who screw you over hard to get ahead at your expense. And very, very rarely, she may even be your boss. Temporarily, at least.

The secret to dealing with these mean girls? I don’t think it’s about us specifically putting them in their place; you won’t be backed by a sea of cheering classmates like Janis Ian was when she said she had a lesbian crush on one in that gymnasium. If reaching out and trying to be a friend isn’t an option, I think we can refuse to put up with them and their mind games and power trips. If that means switching departments, adjusting your work schedule or quitting your job to save your sanity, then maybe that’s what’s necessary. Stop shopping at the store where you got horrible customer service. And if there’s any kind of neutral, superior figure available, I say report to that person and have the mean girl be put in her place by someone who has even more power to do so. Whatever is necessary to protest the behavior should happen because, by simply letting it slide, they’ll simply continue to be mean.

However, part of me doesn’t blame them for being so mean all the time. After high school (and after college), the real world is scary. Everything is more competitive than the race for prom queen, and women aren’t just fighting for attention from the cute boy in class. There’s more at stake now — jobs, rent payments, childhood dreams and potential careers. Screwing someone over sounds so damn tempting sometimes, and being mean can definitely be easier than taking longer to do the right thing.

So if you have yet to encounter a mean girl in the real world, do your part and don’t become one. We women already have enough against us that the  last thing we should be doing is putting ourselves against each other.

Have you been stunned by a mean girl in the real world before? Share what happened below!

Ashley is a UC San Diego grad who is holding on way too tightly to a potential career in magazines and goes to Vegas all too often. She’s fascinated with celebrities and strawberry beer and doubles as a pathological texter/emailer/blogger. Feed the addiction with tweets @cashleelee. Thanks in advance.

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From double DUIs to shoplifting charges, it’s been hard to watch Lindsay make headlines more often from criminal activity than from movie deals (keeping them, at least). She hasn’t led a blockbuster in years, but now she’s collecting attention for racking up $90,000 in unpaid limo bills and getting kicked out of a community service program, before a progress hearing in court. And dentists definitely aren’t her biggest fans—what the hell is up with her teeth?!?

It’s personally painful, all of it. I mean, we practically grew up with her onscreen; she’s a big part of my childhood and I feel like I’m watching an old friend fall by the wayside. Without a toothbrush. What’s a nostalgic fan to do?

LiLo, if it feels like the world is against you right now, we hold your hand in solidarity, regardless of whether your gums are rotting or your fingernails are marked up with swear words. No matter how many mistakes you make and movies you don’t make, we will always remember how you pierced your own ear while away at camp and told Aaron Samuels that his hair looks sexy pushed back. And we’ll click through as many pictures of your awesomeness as we need to until you get it together again:

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There’s always going to be that one girl in your group of friends who seems to take personal pride in your current single status. Regardless of whether she’s single or not, or even somewhere in between (aka dating some aspiring rapper who has a recurrent gig at the local BBQ joint with his not-so-talented beat-boxing cousin), it seems the night hasn’t ended until she’s gone out of her way to make you feel bad about your single life. Since a bitchy attitude has yet to hold up as a reasonable excuse for murder in court, just know there are plenty of other ways to deal with Miss I-Hate-My-Life-So-I’m-Going-To-Make-You-Hate-Yours-Too.

Lesson #34 – How To Deal With A Mean Girl, maturely and not-so-maturely.

First, you can follow your mom’s advice and brush her and her snide remarks off. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother and she has given me some amazing life advice (examples include, “When it comes to coffee stains, dab, don’t rub” and my personal favorite, “It’s time you found some inner peace, dammit”) but let’s face it, there are just some days you don’t feel like being the bigger person. I respect the girls who can walk away from every snide comment, just like our mothers preached, because it really does takes more empowerment to walk away. But on days when you get sick of ignoring Miss Thang and her attitude, you can try some of these methods.

And since I already know there are going to be comments from girls that will claim I’m adding fuel to the fire when it comes to girl drama, here’s my disclaimer: While I’d agree that in order to banish girl-on-girl bashing we must treat each other with respect and that at the end of the day, we should act as a sisterhood. I’m not saying that fighting is always the answer because there are clearly times when you should simply walk away and ignore a mean girl but there are also times when when you need to stand up for yourself. You may not be able to change a mean girl, but there’s a possibility you can change the way she treats you. The key is not to consume your life with doing so. After all, you’re not on a campaign to ruin the girl, you’re just trying to stand up for yourself. With that said, I’ve provided two approaches, “immature” and “mature.” The choice is yours.

The “immature” methods:

Kill that chick…with kindness. Girls know the best responses are rarely ever verbal. A cleverly timed narrowing of the eyes, head tilt or even a yawn can cut deeper than all the curse words in the book. So bust out the least expected one of them all – a smile. You know when you get in a serious fight with a guy you’re dating and he smiles at you and it just enrages you even more? Same concept here. The reason a smile in the middle of fight words makes us so mad is because we feel like we’re not being taken seriously and the easiest way to undermine this girl is to show her that you don’t take her insults seriously even though she clearly does. By smiling her off, you’re basically showing her that her comments hold no merit. Miss Thang takes pride in the conviction she delivers with every jab she takes at you. Blow that conviction wide open with a smile and watch as she clears her throat, looks around and can’t find the right words to say.

Keeping with unassuming tactics, for every girl knows there’s one phrase that can throw even the rudest girl of her game. Just ask any Southern Belle, a “bless your heart,” is one of the quickest ways to shut a mean girl down. If you want to turbo-boost the effectiveness of the “bless your heart,” just remember a slight pout and a preceding “aw,” can work wonders. For those north of the Mason-Dixon line, it’s not hard to understand why “bless your heart” is the perfect insult. The phrase works because it assumes that the girl just doesn’t know any better, once again, keeping with the theme that you’re not taking her words seriously.

The “mature” method:

If you really want to catch this girl off guard, play it mature and have it out with her. Next time she makes a remark, without getting all Dr. Phil on her, simply ask her this question, “Why is that you always have to point out the fact that I’m single?” You’ll get to address the problem maturely and you’ll get the satisfaction of watching her scramble for the right words to say. The mean girl game runs on the assumption that no one will call them out on their behavior. Once you call her out, in a calm, mature way, half the work is done for you. She might try to play dumb or write her comments off as a joke, but hold your own without resorting to raising your voice and just say you’d appreciate it if she’d stop. If she doesn’t let up after that, you’ll know it’s time to finally walk away.

Got it? Feel empowered? Good. Now get the first 33 rules of the Single Girl Society

It seems as though the Hollywood is putting out more sequels and remakes than original ideas nowadays, and if it’s this bad now, we can only imagine how bad it’s going to be 30 years from now. Oh well, even if the writers of the future are even more out of ideas than they are now, at least there are a few recent movies that they could remake and then play on TBS during Saturday afternoons.

What movie would you like to see remade and which movie should Hollywood never touch again? What movies do you consider to be the classics of this generation?

Dear Tuffy Luv,

So to start, this is humiliating, but last Friday night I peed my bed. I’m a 24-year-old grad student and live in the dorms at my school. I have no idea what happened, and this was a completely random event. Anyways, my roommate found out (it was pretty easy, she was awake when I woke up soaked…), which was even more embarrassing. I got up, took my wet pajamas off and went to take a shower. When I got back to the room, I stripped my sheets and took everything to wash. When I got back, I sprayed my mattress with Lysol…I think I handled the situation very responsibly.

But Monday, I got an email from my RA, requesting a meeting with me, my roommate, and her boss, who runs the whole dorm. Come to find out, my roommate had taken pictures of my wet bed and clothes. In the meeting, they expressed their concern that a girl my age was “still wetting the bed,” which is apparently how my roommate explained the situation. My RA’s boss said I had to pay for a new mattress and am required to have a waterproof mattress cover on the new one. Having the mattress cover isn’t a big deal, but paying for the new mattress caused my account to be billed and now my parents are aware of the incident. My roommate also told EVERYBODY in our hall about my accident, a rumor that has circulated to many more people on campus and made me the target of many snide remarks. Up until now, we had a great relationship. But I have no idea what to do! This has been the most humiliating few days of my life. I really don’t want to live with her anymore-should I request a room transfer or what? I cannot believe this has become such a big deal!

If you could offer advice, I’d really appreciate it,
Thank you,
BW

Dear BW,

Oh, man. That sucks.

Well, these things happen, no? Once in a while, some horribly embarrassing incident occurs, and, happily, you really did deal with it well. As you say, you were responsible, and you were also considerate.

Unfortunately, we can’t say these things about your roommate.

Okay, first let’s get this part out of the way: health stuff, yes? I’m glad to hear this is the first time it happened. Probably it was just a total fluke. (Were you drinking? That’ll do it.) But if it happens again, you should go get it checked out by a doctor. There are, Tuffy just learned, a number of things that can cause a person to wet their bed even when they’re otherwise healthy. So, seriously, if you find yourself in the same situation again, get thee to the college clinic.

In the meantime, your roommate is a total bootch and you should definitely move out.

There is no way to salvage your relationship with this girl. Instead of asking if you were okay, she went behind your back and told everyone a very embarrassing and personal thing. Karma will get her; you just get out. Don’t just request a room transfer. Transfer out of the building. There is really no way for you to recover from this. Something crappy happened to you, and then your roommate made it crappier. I’m not telling you to run away from it, but I am telling you to GET away from it. Cut your losses and move and then never speak of it again.

As for the haters who bring it up, I’d just put on a sad face and say, “Oh man, I was really sick that night” and refuse to give any other details. Hopefully they’ll feel messed up for bringing it up (which they are) and, either way, you know not to deal with said individuals again.

And your roommate? Eff her in the ear. Don’t speak another word to her. Ever.

Sorry, man. Feel good.

Hearts & Skulls,

Tuffy Luv

Like a little pain? Get more Tough Love right here.

So yeah.  This is happening.  One of the greatest movies of our generation (and of LiLo’s career), Mean Girls, is getting a straight-to-DVD sequel.  And it looks appalling. No worse than appaling. It’s like they gave the Mean Girls script to a second grader and said “don’t change the plot, but rewrite all the dialogue”.

[Ladies, meet Meredith, the newest addition to the CollegeCandy team. She's a BU student, a movie buff, and an all around fantastic chicadee. She'll be our resident movie gal, giving us the ins and outs of the new releases and telling us whether or not its worth it to fork over $12 for the latest flicks.]

Easy A is the story of “anonymous” high school student, Olive (Emma Stone). Olive tells her story to her webcam in a monologue-esque tone. Although it is clear that she is addressing an audience, this is very clearly HER story. She explains how her friend Brandon asks her to tell everyone that they had sex so that people would think he was straight. In an effort to move the plot along (and because Olive is a great friend), two minutes later, Olive and Brandon are banging on the walls of a party for their faux-sex sesh.

Soon, every nerdy guy is asking Olive to do the same for them. And before long (and after many fake sex sessions) she ticks off the group of Christians at her school, led by Marianne (the retired Amanda Bynes). After a scuffle in an English class that is reading The Scarlet Letter, Olive decides to go all out and put a red A on all of her clothes. For those who have forgotten the plot from the Sparknotes version that they read in high school, The Scarlet Letter is about the Puritan protagonist, Hester Prynne, being forced to wear a red “A” (for “Adulterer”) after getting pregnant out of wedlock.

It’s very rare that some teen movie comes out that speaks to high school students while still making them laugh. Easy A tries very hard to compare itself to John Hughes films, but for our generation, much like 10 Things I Hate About You and Mean Girls. They’re over the top, they’re corny at times, they reinforce certain stereotypes,  but they remain relatable to most “misunderstood” teens. But Easy A isn’t like these movies for one main reason: Easy A doesn’t speak to the group, it tells the story of ONE girl.

Easy A isn’t The Breakfast Club, 10 Things I Hate About You, or Mean Girls for this very reason. That’s why it kind of pissed me off that it was trying so hard to be a “high school film.” Emma Stone is awesome. She’s funny, cute, quirky, and she really can carry this movie. But it isn’t about high school; it’s about Olive and her journey. The film surrounds Olive with geeks, homosexuals, and Christians, but they are nothing but caricatures.

Although I was disappointed that Olive was basically the only developed character, the film was decent. But I wouldn’t rush out to see it. The acting by Amanda Bynes, Penn Badgley, Patricia Clarkson, Lisa Kudrow, and Stanley Tucci was as good as it could have been for the flat characters they were given to work with. Seriously, I’m talking no depth at all and no explanation for any of their character’s actions. I’m hoping that Emma Stone will take be able to take on some riskier roles now that she has proven that she can carry a movie.

By the way, halfway through, I really started to wonder, if word at this school travels so fast that “who’s sleeping with who” gets around before second period AND many guys know that they can hire Olive to lie for them, why are there still people in the school who aren’t in on the scam?

Overall, the film is cute with some fun one-liners. And Emma Stone truly is brilliant. I would recommend it as long as you’re not going in hoping for the Easy A that’s seen in the trailer (a high school comedy that will resonate with all teens). Instead, enjoy Olive’s story.

P.S. Amanda Bynes – will you retire already? JK? But not really? Well, just continue to keep us posted.