As a semi-live-in girlfriend, I encounter all kinds of things in my boyfriend’s boudoir that he might have previously attempted to put away or hide to create a more presentable version of himself. Well those days are long gone and I am now subject to every dirty pair of boxers, week old Taco Bell leftover and wet, mildewed towel left on the bed. But these things I’m pretty much immune to. Guys’ rooms are almost by definition a hell of a lot dirtier than girls (at least I like to pretend) and all of these little things can be fixed with a load of laundry, a huge garbage bag and a little Febreeze.

But what are the kinds of things that you would never want to find in your guy’s room? Besides the very obvious (unrecognizable panties, bras, earrings, condom wrappers) I can name a few…

1. Super Creepy Porn.

You can pretty much accept the fact that there will be some form of porn in your guy’s room at some point. You can also be fairly sure that you will accidentally intercept said pornography via mail, browser history or that shoebox under his bed. (Tip: boys don’t want you to surprise them with spring cleaning; you probably shouldn’t want to surprise them with it either.) No big deal, I say, come to terms with the fact that while your guy absolutely loves hooking up with you, he will still want to look at porn. It’s just a different outlet for their sexuality and can actually improve your sex life when seen from the right perspective. Additionally, it’s a good substitute for when your boyfriend wants to get it on (always) and you don’t (rarely, but it happens). If there were no porn there would be an abnormally high amount of blue balls or of extremely exhausted girlfriends. Read More »

The show begins exactly where the last episode left off, right after eliminations. Flav wants some time with Bunz and as they are making out on his bed, Flav tells her that she is the first girl to be there. So where was Hotlanta the night before? That clearly was your bed, dude.

The next morning, the Things and Sinceer talk about how they are the only real ones left in the house now that Grayvee has been eliminated. Poor thing, Grayvee did seem to be there FOR Flav. Sinceer calls their mission to get the fakes out of the house “Operation Focused.” Haha. Get a drink and start Operation Drunk Ass already.

The challenge for the day: the girls will split into three teams so that they can create a children’s bed time story based on the costumes that they’re given. These costumes are going to be so far from kid friendly. And obviously Flav will bring in children to hear these stories.

What kind of sh*tty parents let their children appear on this show? Actually, who am I kidding – if I had a kid, I’d force them on to this show so that I could witness this mess on the set myself. Read More »