Remember Bristol Palin, the most popular unwed mama-to-be since Jamie Lynn Spears? We haven’t heard much about her (or her gun-toting mother) since Barack Obama won the election. Well, she’s almost due! Little Baby Palin will be gracing Wasilla with her presence this weekend!

Unfortunately, she is going to be without gifts from Grandma Johnston. Looks like Levi’s mama got herself into a little bit of trouble…

“The 42-year-old Johnston has been charged with six felony drug counts.”Whoops!

Not that we can blame her; what else is there to do in Alaska (besides sleep with the Governor’s daughter and go sledding)? She must have been totally down and out after she lost her chance to hang out at the White House. She should have stuck with Sarah and opted for hunting moose to lift her spirits instead.

It’s certainly not a secret that Amy Winehouse is a hot mess. But for a quite a while, I kind of loved her hot mess-ness. Like when “Rehab” was all over the radio and she was blithely tripping around from club to club with her outrageous hair mountain, getting unapologetically wasted and, in fact, refusing to go to rehab…well, compared to the usual celebrity trips to Cedars-Sinai accompanied by bullsh*t tales of “exhaustion” and subsequent photos of said celebrities clutching bottles of Grey Goose two weeks after being released, Winehouse was kind of a breath of fresh air.

Yeah, she was ridiculous, but she wasn’t lying about it. She knew she was buckwild and she owned it, for better or worse.

However, Winehouse has long since passed the point of cheeky irresponsibility and is progressively becoming more and more of a certifiable horror show. Witness her newest totally insane escapade that occurred just yesterday at her husband Blake Fielder-Civil’s assault trial in London.

Winehouse, who showed up no less than four hours late for the trial, parked herself in the front row where she spent the duration of the proceedings doing a number of apesh*t crazy things, including; Read More »

You know how I know it’s gonna be a great day? Because the first thing I saw on the Internet this morning was a big, fat picture of the uterus of Stephanie Tanner, a.k.a Jodie Sweetin.

Didn’t you know uteruses of old T.G.I.F stars are good luck? It’s true.

Stephanie Tanner, who spent 9 unforgettable years causing shenanigans and making me jealous on Full House, (Tommy Page is so dreamy) with the same expression on her face, is now preggers! Not only that, but she sent her ultrasound pics to TMZ for what I can only guess is some hopeful media attention. Man, what some people will do….rather unnecessary if you ask me, but this is much better attention than her addiction to meth! Wee-hoo!

But Stephanie isn’t the only one with new developments (and in her case, developments also means “boob job”). Some updates on the fam:

Danny Tanner, a.k.a Bob Saget, recently had an HBO comedy special. Too bad it sucked. If you’re gonna do a whole bit on animal sex and incessantly curse, make it funny. Read More »

• Too bad NBC, Paris’ first interview is going to the King… Larry King. (TMZ)

• The Arctic Monkeys’ fans mosh in worlds largest mudpit. (dailymail)

• Most-expensive-comedy-ever bombs big at box-office. (deadlinehollywooddaily)

• Fergie fears her hamper wants to kill her. Meth is whack! (msn)

• The Tijuana Diet – Redbull and Diet pills. It will make you run faster. (woai)

A shocking new drug epidemic has emerged in Texas. Since 2005, 21 Dallas – area teens have overdosed on “cheese heroin,” a potent mixture of black tar heroin and Tylenol PM. The highly dangerous combination of downers is highly accessible and frighteningly cheap. In Dallas, where a gram of cheese heroin sells for $10 (a hit can be as little as $2), the drug has become as ubiquitous as pot. The feds are all up in arms about the lure of the cheese spreading to other states.

The underground drug world never ceases to amaze me. What will they come up with next? Milkshake crack? Thank God I’m lactose – intolerant.

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