The Pissed List: Remaking Full House Would Be Like Repainting The Mona Lisa (Unnecessary!)

full-house-cast.jpg[It's the first full week of December, and while the rest of the world gears up for The Most Wonderful Time of the Year, I still need to take a break from the constant holiday cheer. The following is this week’s Pissed List, so if you’ve got to vent, too, just holla atcha girl!]

1. The Full House Remake

You weren’t a child of the ’90s unless you watched “Full House” (and if you didn’t, you seriously missed out on some major TGIF action). You knew the Tanner family. You still catch reruns when you stumble upon them flipping through the channels. You pause, you catch a Kimmy Gibbler cameo and laugh, and you remember how things were. And that’s how it should be. Now that John “Uncle Jesse” Stamos is proposing a Full House remake show, all our classic memories may be tainted. Seeing the aged DJ and Steph and the rest of the gang is just going to make me feel like an old fart. And the next thing you know, people are going to start making covers of good ’90s songs, and I’m going to start thinking to myself, “the original ‘Quit Playin Games With My Heart’ was so much better,” and then I will have turned into my mother, and this can’t happen during my 20s.

2. The Obama Citizenship Scandal

I don’t quite follow why this is happening (for all practical purposes, the presidential transition is already underway, and the last thing this country needs is more divisive action), but someone is suing Barack Obama, disputing his US citizenship and thus his claim to the presidency. For the record, Obama was born on August 4, 1961 in Hawaii, which became a member of the Union in 1959. Now what’s the problem? (And let’s not forget that former-rival John McCain was born in Panama on US-zoned territory). Read More »

Candy Dish: Uniforms Are In, Along With ‘NSYNC

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Elizabeth Hasselbeck had to eat her McCain/Palin words.

 

Pretty soon, AT&T will own damn near everything, including your soul.

 

 

Military uniforms make great women’s fashion for the fall.

 

Ever thought Barack, Michelle, Sarah, and John would appear on TV together? Well, South Park got them together in a jewelry heist.

 

Boy bands are all the rage and ‘NSYNC’s Lance Bass wants in on the action.

 

Having lots of sex? You may need this.

 

California has disappointed most, especially Ellen.

 

Want to sing in the rain? This umbrella has you rockin’.

 

Sexy Scarlett Johansson to wed? Perhaps!