No, friends, what I’m talking about is the epidemic known as Girls Posting Slutty / Drunk Pictures of Themselves on Facebook.

Obviously, this isn’t a new trend, but as I enter the age of (supposed) maturity, I can’t help but feel frustrated at the onslaught of obviously wasted half-naked girls clogging the photo albums of kids I used to baby-sit in high school.

I admit, I used to have a fair share of “I’m so DRUNK” pictures on my Facebook account, but as soon as I started to assert myself as an adult, I went and erased every single picture that made me seem…less than smart. I’m of age, I’m allowed to have fun, but how mature can I really make myself out to be if there are pictures floating around somewhere that show me hanging upside down off someone’s couch or double fisting two shots of Jack?

We all know it’s not just our friends who can see those wild and crazy pictures of us, and the more exposure Facebook gets, the more I wonder why so many girls are going out of their way to make themselves look cheap and easy to the entire internet community.

What do these girls think these photos will do? Get them dates? Get them exposure? Get them fans? Based on my knowledge of the human race, I’d say the only thing one can expect from slutty, sexy pictures are a bunch of guys simultaneously getting of on and making fun of whoever’s the subject.

Obviously, dudes post drunk pictures of themselves online too, but as Britney and Paris prove, nothing draws a crowd like slutty (or slutty seeming) girl—and nothing makes that crowd lose respect of the photographed faster than getting exactly what they asked for.

How interesting or challenging can a girl really be if she treats herself like an object?

Keeping those drunk antics from the public eye isn’t always about morality or being a prude, sometimes its just common sense. Post a few pictures of you making out with other girls, lifting up your shirt, or posing provocatively, and people are going to expect that from you all the time.

Go out, have fun, but think twice about making yourself into a lush purely for the benefit of others. Once the damage is done, it’s real hard to undo it…especially on the internet.

Just ask Miss New Jersey.

Vanessa Williams she’s not. In fact, the photos, which depict a clothed Miss NJ stretching and breast-feeding her boyfriend, are way lamer than most photos I see go up on Facebook everyday — including my friend Anthony’s 47 albums dedicated to his semester in Budapest.

So what’s the big deal? I can only conclude that Miss NJ is a big, fat attention whore, scheming to steal America’s heart and crown by overcoming this horrible media adversity with grace and politesse. She might have had something if the pics were of her shooting up in the slums of Trenton with a gaggle of trannies, but spreading your jean-clad legs for a photo is not exactly controversy. It’s called flash photography. (Photo Slideshow after the jump)

Sorry, Miss NJ, but until you get yourself in some real trouble, we’re just not gonna care. In the meantime, you’re a big disappointment. If you really want to be famous, learn something from that former Miss USA, why don’t you.

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UPDATE 7.12.07: Click here to see the photos.

All I have to say is thank god I’m not Miss New Jersey, because who knows what people would say about my facebook pictures. For all of the publicity her facebook blackmail scandal has gotten, Amy Polumbo has managed to handle the situation with the gracefulness that apparently only a beauty queen can posses.

The first package of photos arrived last week and threatened Amy to turn in her crown or face having the photos published. The second package, containing actual prints of “scandalous” photos arrived sometime last weekend. Miss NJ won’t discuss the contents of the photos, but it has been said that they were from a drama department Cabaret bootcamp retreat. We all know that with drama comes a bit of eccentricity (and with cabaret, a bit of risqué clothing) but could there really be blackmail material from a school sponsored weekend away?

During her interview with the Today show, Amy said that there was nothing illegal happening in the pictures. And according to Polumbo’s lawyer, it isn’t the content of the photos but rather the fictitious captions that worry her a bit. And rightly so, I can’t imagine the things some people could assume from my pictures if they didn’t really understand the context.

What would disturb me more is the fact that Amy’s facebook profile was private. Which means either one of her “friends” (because really how many people are we genuinely friends with on our networking sites) is trying to ruin her recently crowned glory or someone did a nice little hacking job into her profile. Whoever it is, the situation is a bit disconcerting.

Honestly, I kind of hope she doesn’t turn in her crown and just allows those blackmailing assholes to publish the photos. I’m sure they’re much more tame than anything I, and probably every other college girl, has tagged.

I, for one, would like to see exactly what is so “bad” about Amy’s photos. Because that might prompt a bit of untagging of my own, granted one day I’m ever blackmailed.