Most of us don’t appreciate our mothers as much as we should. In fact, I’m pretty sure Kanye West was the only person ever to truly idolize and appreciate everything his mother did for him. I mean, the guy wrote her a song! And what did you do? Buy the woman some almost-dead tulips?!

Not only did those women push us out of their very narrow birth canal, but they’ve been doting on us ever since. Mothers have the hardest job in the world (2nd hardest: working in a chocolate shop and not eating any) and are constantly called upon to do more and more and more.

And they do it with grace.

Yet, they also usually do it without thanks. So, in honor of Mother’s Day this Sunday, I called upon the CollegeCandy writers to share their favorite things about the most important woman in their lives: mama. Because no matter how annoying she can get (especially now that she’s on Facebook), your mama loves you and you gotta show that love right back.

Share your love for mom in the comments section below (then show mom your comment as a nice, free Mother’s Day Gift….awwwww). Read More »

We love our mothers unconditionally. No matter how angry we get at them or how embarrassed our mothers make us, we continue to be on their side. They can yell at us, criticize us or even spend over $15,000 on plastic surgery in attempt to look like our identical twin and we will still love ‘em anyway. Wait, that last one has never happened to you?

Okay, maybe your mother hasn’t gone to the extreme like Jane Cunliffe’s mom, Janet, who believes that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Sure, your mother hasn’t spent thousands of dollars to change her nose, lips, breasts, hair and clothes, only to be mistaken as your younger sister. That was a bad example, but I’m sure she’s done something embarrassing that you’ve forgiven her for.

Nothing comes to mind? Well, I have ten “I-could-kill-you-I’m-so-embarrassed” moments below. Let me refresh your memory for you. If I forgot anything, please leave it in the comments, I like to know I’m not alone.

Moms are embarrassing when they…

1. Drive you to school in their pajamas.

2. Dress like you.  Juicy sweatsuits and belly shirts aren’t PTA appropriate!

3. Pull a Dina Lohan and gets all stage-mom on you.

4. Flirt with your friend’s fathers. Or your friends…

5. Lecture or yell at your friends.

6. Still lick their thumbs to wipe something off your face. For the last time, its a freckle and I’m 22 years old!

7. Try to set you up with anything with a penis.

8. Make awkward sexual jokes.

9. Wear Mom jeans. Enough said.

10. Use words like “underpants” in public.

I just spent 15 minutes trying to figure out something smart to say about this, but the pink camouflage is too distracting.

…Also the correlation between a weapon of death and women who have “the caring heart and tenderness of good wives, mothers, sisters, and daughters.” That’s distracting too.

It seems like every time I have lunch with my mom, we have the following conversation:

MOM: (after a thoughtful silence) So…

ME: (while eating) Mmhmm?

MOM: So, is he….the one?

ME: (still eating, somewhat muffled) what?

MOM: Have you discussed the “M” word?

ME: (after a pause, uncomfortably) Well, I guess…

MOM: (bursts into tears)

She’s not crying because she doesn’t like my significant other, quite to the contrary. She is crying because she realizes that marriage is another step towards adulthood and away from any pretenses that I am still a virgin.

I get uncomfortable during this conversation not because I am uncomfortable at the prospect of marriage but because I’m uncomfortable with the pomp and circumstance implied by the whole dress-cake-church-crying parents to-do. A big wedding is something that popular culture tells us that women have been dreaming about since they were little girls, but every time I think about having to put all that time, money and effort into one day, I get unpleasantly itchy.

The truth is, I am sort of engaged, but I haven’t told my mom yet. I don’t want my huge southern family losing their collective sh*t or making a big thing out of it, I also really don’t want to have the you-don’t-need-a-grossly-expensive-ring-to-be-engaged conversation, but mostly I don’t want to have to deal with my mother’s shock and total dismay when I tell her about the wedding plans we’ve made (and I use the terms “wedding” “plans” and “made” very loosely).

We are eloping. To Oregon. To get married at a doughnut shop. Read More »

I don’t know much about it yet, but I guess breastfeeding is good for your babies. So, breast milk and babies? A sensible combination.

But babies and Facebook? Not so much.

I don’t care how much Facebook is “expanding” its users. Facebook is really for college students and it should stay that way. Which is why I’m not too offended to find out that it has been removing pictures of females breastfeeding their kids.

The blog posted on USAToday said, “Karen Speed, a 33-year-old Canadian mother who describes herself as a “lactivist,” tells The (Toronto) Star that such photos led Facebook to delete her account and a support group she had established for breastfeeding mothers.”

First of all, what is Karen Speed, a 33-year-old Canadian mother/lactivist doing on Facebook in the first place? What is she possibly getting out of this? Finding out at which side of campus the next tailgate is gonna start? Checking up on her douchebag ex-boyfriend to see if he added any new skanks to his friend list?

Seriously, Karen. Seriously.

I think it’s great that mothers are reaching out to each other for support, but is it really necessary to post, what I think, are such personal and intimate photos on this particular site that is regularly monitored? Here is one of the pics that was removed from the site, and nipple or not – it may not be “obscene” as Facebook would say, but it’s still pretty needless on a college-based networking site. Read More »