So the first three months of your new romance have you got you sleeping over at his place every night, catching every meal together and bailing on girls’ night for a cuddlefest. While I hate to rain on your “young-and-in-love” parade, let me remind you that falling in love and gambling have a lot in common – it can be easy to lose it all but not so easy to get it all back.

Lesson 32: Don’t lose yourself in loving him.

When I listen to girls who’ve just met a great guy, it never seems as though loving that guy is enough for them. It’s as if they are trying to become him as they surround themselves with his friends, start living by his schedule, catering to his beliefs even if they go against everything they’d ever stood for in the past. What they fail to realize is that everything they do, every decision they make is really just his. You can love a man without emulating him.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, as it seems that girls can never hear this advice enough – single or not, live your life. You’d think that after years of our mothers and friends hammering this into our minds, it’d be second nature and yet, so many girls find themselves lost without the one they love. Being heartbroken is one thing, being lost is an entirely other thing. Don’t ever get so wrapped up in loving another person that you lose yourself in the process. There’s only one of you, which makes you pretty damn rare, so hold tight to who you are and what you believe in.

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The thing about me is that I’m easily annoyed. Perhaps that will be my downfall in relationships, but c’mon,  there are some things that are just common sense. No one wants to feel smothered or totally ignored. Showing up everywhere I am is creepy. I’m sorry if you thought it was romantic. And these are just a few of those small things that are sure to annoy me when I first start dating a new guy.

Here are the rest:

initiating the gallery...

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How often should I see my new guy?

Celebrity siblings who rejected the spotlight

13 highly questionably beauty & hygiene tips from celebs

Is the new Gwen Stefani??

I’m truly baffled people are still watching this show

Meet Teen Vogue’s celebrity intern

Not the most seasonal dress to wear to a premiere

Meet Justin Bieboar

Good night internet (funny video)

Relationships are great, there’s always someone to give you attention, to go eat with, to be your date to parties, and so many more activities (wink wink, nudge nudge)! But somewhere along the relationship journey, it’s easy to forget that you have friends that can do (most of) the same things your significant other can. While you can’t share some sexy time with your BFF (well maybe you can and there’s nothing wrong with that), you can still spend time with your non-relationship friends.

And they want you to, I know it.

Being in a relationship is fun, but don’t lose sight of the other important things in your life – namely, your friends. They were there before the BF and, if you play your cards right, they’ll be there after.

Need some ideas for balancing all the important people in your life? Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered.

1. Don’t become a “we”: It’s easy to get carried away, especially in that honeymoon phase when you and your bf have to be together all. the. time. Soon enough, you stop being two people and morph into a “we.” You eat together, you sleep together, you shower together, you do everything together. All that is fine and dandy, but becoming a “we” doesn’t always go over well with your friends. When your girls invite you over to watch Grey’s Anatomy, they want to spend time with you, not you and your boyfriend. And the same goes for nights out, Sunday brunches and many other occasions. Do your part and ask if the boyf is invited before you bring him along to mani/pedi day. Read More »

The beginning stages of a new relationship are always the best. Thinking about the other person gives you butterflies, every date is an exciting new adventure, and you aren’t close enough for him to start discussing his farting habits with you.

But it is also a little scary. You want to show that special man who you are, but not enough to scare him off before you have the chance to steal his super-comfy sweatpants. And you find yourself constantly wondering if he thinks about you as much as you think about him, why he hasn’t called yet and if he minded that you screamed really loudly while watching Saw 3 the night before.

When I was younger, the scariest part of a new relationship – especially with someone I really liked – was walking the line between being myself and doing/saying things that I thought he wanted to hear. I know it sounds pathetic, but you know you’ve been there too; telling him you love Bob Seger only to freak when he asks your favorite song. Or pretending to be obsessed with The Sopranos and then wondering what station that show is even on.

Now that I am approaching adulthood (graduation is coming at me quickly!) I have finally come to terms with who I am on my own and in a relationship. I now realize that there are plenty of really good guys out there for me so I don’t have to settle for that douche bag who pops his collar and wears a giant gold chain.

But, I can’t be too stubborn. There are a few things I will tweak for a boy:

1. Hair Maintenance: Singledom means a break from leg/bikini cleanups. But even I know that it is only fair to do a little tidying if I expect anyone to approach.

2. Music Preference: Not that I will ditch my own amazing music collection (ranging from the tunes of Sister Act to the infamous Beastie Boys), but being in a new relationship is all about experiencing new things. Plus, it makes the option of a cuddly concert date much more probable. Read More »

Some people are into long walks on the beach, candlelit dinners, and getting fancy. Other people are into staying in, watching movies, and keeping it low key. Some people work in big office buildings bringing in the cash, while others bus tables and do dishes for minimum wage. But what do all of these people have in common?  Some of them, from any category and walk of life, are into being tied up, spanked and dominated.

That’s right, folks, kinky people are everywhere.

I know when I used to think of “kink”, I would think of a leather daddy or someone who walks their boyfriend on a leash around the mall. We tend to be taught the extremes, so I never really thought of it any other way. Once I started educating myself on what it actually means to be kinky, I realized that the kinky lifestyle isn’t always so extreme after all.

Okay, so to start with, what is a kink? What’s a fetish? Broken down very simply, a kink is something that turns you on, while a fetish is something you have a hard time getting turned on without. Kinks are typically less extreme, like high heels and handcuffs, while a fetish is typically a bit more out there – like feet, centaurs, and genital mutilation. Not that there is anything wrong with either a kink or a fetish… that’s just usually how it plays out. Read More »

How cute is this guy?

Question for La Tuff?! Email her at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com and, you know, she might answer you and shoop.

Dear Tuffy Luv,

I have been seeing this guy at school on-and-off since the beginning of the school year. He’s a freshman, I’m a sophomore. At the beginning, we hit it off great for about three weeks, and then he felt that he needed to keep his options open as a freshman–which I understood and let it go. He came back around Thanksgiving time and told me he wanted to start seeing me again, and I agreed. Things went great for a while, he called/texted me often over our month-long winter break, and I thought he seemed pretty into me. So, naturally, when we got back for spring semester, we were pretty into each other and he eventually asked me to be his girlfriend. Read More »

Is this too new for chocolates?

As we all know, celebrating Valentine’s Day when in a new relationship can be somewhat awkward.  How should you acknowledge the holiday?  Here are some tips from the gift giving experts at SomeoneSpoilMe.com.

Just Started Dating

If you just started dating someone and decided that you are going to spend Valentine’s Day together, you should definitely give him a gift.  There is no need to give him anything over the top – it should be thoughtful, but not too personal. Here are some great options for him… Read More »

See ya later, Single Status!

It’s weird how it happens. One day you’re screaming “THIS IS MY SONG!” every time “Single Ladies” comes on at the bar, and the next…well, you’re doing the same thing, but it’s not actually true. After just over two years of being the most single person on the planet, I actually took the dive. It happened really unexpectedly with a cute acquaintance I have known for years. We started talking a little more, and things took off out of nowhere.

I used to want to jack people in the face when they said, “When you stop looking for a boyfriend, you’ll get one.” And even though that is exactly what happened, that’s still really annoying advice. I think I hate it largely because it takes the situation out of your hands; as if you have to be in some sort of cosmic state of perfect personal balance just to get a damn date. I think a better way to phrase the advice is this:

Beating yourself up over not having a boyfriend or becoming depressed that “there’s no one out there” isn’t going to make your perfect mate appear out of thin are. There are times when 5 guys ask you out in a week, and there are times when your only male interaction for months is with your Environmental Science professor (hopefully not the wrong kind of interaction…). You can control your love life, but only to a certain extent. You don’t completely control who you meet, when you meet them, or (even as much as we try) how they feel about you. Read More »

Sex is kinda like a cell phone. You can live without it, but in the end, would you really want to? Like our cell phones, we all end up taking what we can get in a pinch. We may not be happy with the phone (or person) we choose, but sometimes anything can be better than nothing.

I’ve taken the liberty to analyze the various sexual shenanigans we get ourselves into, and I think I’ve come onto something. I’m starting to think that our sexual partners closely resemble that of our cellular telephone devices. Think I’m full of s**t? Well read on, nonbeliever.

The Crap Nokia aka The One Night Stand

So you’re hovering over the frat house toilet seat, trying not to get an STI or pee on yourself, and your phone slips out of your back pocket and plops into the water. Suddenly, you’re out of a cell phone and you need one, STAT. Just like getting dumped or running into your ex, I would think of this as a rather desperate situation. So what do you do? You go for the next easy thing that comes along and satisfies your basic needs. Just like your friend’s gigantic Nokia phone with Snake and an antenna, a one night stand will be there for you when you need one thing and one thing only. You may use Mr. Nokia for a night or two, but you can bet you’ll toss that puppy as soon as something better comes along. Read More »