Another day, another Bieber story. But this time, he’s not being accused of impregnating a random woman or having terrible hair. He has a new single! It’s called “Boyfriend.” You know, so that all the little 12 year old girls who are obsessed with Justin Bieber can pretend he’s singing it just for them.

I’ve never been a Bieber fan (cue the angry comments), but I think he’s reached a new level of awful with this song. In the intro, he makes sort of an attempt at rapping, but it’s more like a male version of the Ke$ha sing-talk. And then he starts singing, and from there the song pretty much turns into a Jesse McCartney ripoff.

Some sample lyrical gems: “I could be a Buzz Lightyear, fly across the globe.” Come on Beibs. If I wanted a plastic doll for a boyfriend, obviously I would choose Ken. Oh, and also this: “If I was your man…” Wait, didn’t you just turn 18? LOL. Honey, you are nobody’s “man.” Read More »

Everyone’s favorite celebrity train wreck is proving that she’s still chugging along on the pop star track this week. Britney Spears’ new single, “Womanizer” has already been leaked and was even featured in last week’s episode of The Hills. But this Friday, she promises a REAL comeback when the video for “Womanizer” premieres on 20/20.

20/20?!?!?

Yeah, I guess MTV was booked and VH1 wanted to squeeze in another season of The ’80s: Apparently The Greatest Decade Ever. So Brit Brit had to take her comeback vehicle over to that other prime-time music machine, 20/20.

As the world waits with bated breath for the visual celebration of “Womanizer,” let’s take a look at what we’re expecting from the video:

1) Gratuitous shots of Britney’s new-and-improved toned midsection

2) Slithering dance moves (either of the floor or pole variety)

3) Windblown hair and pouty face

4) Submissive guy candy

5) Some outrageous outfit (think “Oops I Did It Again”)

To see if our predictions come true, tune in this Friday to ABC at 10 pm.

After a 4-year hiatus, Usher’s new single dropped on Tuesday. Featuring Young Jeezy and titled, “Love in This Club,” it’s a catchy tune, but has lyrics that slightly disturb me. Since it’s Usher, there’s not doubt the song is going to be huge and soon you’ll be grinding to it in all the frat houses basements and bar dance floors, but that doesn’t stop me from being just the tiniest bit skeeved out.

Okay, so the lyrics. The main chorus claims, “I wanna make love in this club” over and over. Does that sketch anyone else out? I wasn’t aware that doing the dirty in a club was considered acceptable these days. I mean, can’t we make love when we get home from the club? You know, a little bit of privacy is always good. Or at least avoiding the promise of getting arrested. Usher doesn’t “care who’s watching,” but I think I might. Read More »