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Have Rihanna and Chris Brown been hooking up in secret?

Let’s make some non-New Years Resolutions.

A new year, a new semester, a new slate. Sounds pretty great, right? There’s no reason why you shouldn’t seize the day and prepare to have the best semester of your college life! Plus, you know what they say — it’s easier to start off on the right foot than it is to change course later on. In the spirit of good habits and even better grades, we’ve pulled together a list of the academic resolutions we should all be making this January. It really is all about adapting a few small, simple changes to your lifestyle…talk about an easy-A!

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It’s that time of year where we all take stock of our lives, realize we’re hot messes and resolve to change our behavior…for about two weeks. Because while eating healthier, working out more and generally being a more mature person are worthy aspirations that we should all work towards, we would be remiss if we failed to acknowledge that our sex lives could always use a little work. Whether you’re having sex daily, every six months or not at all, with a long-term partner, a FWB, or a one night stand, there is always room to grow and have better experiences.  I mean, if the apocalypse or whatever really is next December, I need to go out knowing that I had the sexiest year to date, so next year, I want to do the following…

1. Stop feeling guilty about my preferences.
Sometimes I’m not in the mood. Sometimes I don’t want to be on top. Sometimes I just want to lay there and enjoy it. Sometimes I want Rihanna playing in the background. It’s totally okay for me to be selfish sometimes, because while, yes, pleasing my partner is important, so is taking my own pleasure into account. This is definitely a balancing act I don’t have down yet.

2. Take advantage of my balcony. 
It would be absolutely criminal to not take an opportunity to have a romantic romp or a tawdry quickie on my private, 18th floor balcony.

3. Try some of the Kama Sutra
I’ve never really been interested in it because I always associated it with bored middle-aged people desperate to revitalize their long-dormant sex lives (ie: not at all arousing). But there must be a reason why this tradition has endured thousands of years.

4. Explore sex toys.
I finally procured my first vibrator this year, but I have yet to be inspired to use it. But I’m definitely interested in trying to enjoy masturbation, and this is the next step that I plan to take.

5. Stop comparing myself to porn stars. 
Occasionally I watch porn with the boytoy, and while occasionally I am inspired to try something new, many times I find myself in a serious inferiority matrix and I start beating myself up for not being as aggressive, or enthusiastic, or as capable as the women in the pornos. I know this is completely irrational – even the “amateurs” are professionals, and I know that I do the best that I can, and am objectively pretty good at it,  but I still find myself getting bummed out about it, and it’s not at all productive.

6. Have fun.
If you regularly read my column, you may have picked up on the fact that I can get really caught up in the political aspect of fornication — the gender roles,  society’s general sex-negativity, all the ways in which sex can go wrong — which sometimes I forget to relax and just enjoy the fact that I am regularly have safe, consensual sex with someone who cares about and respects me.

What are your sexy New Year’s resolutions for 2012?

It’s getting to that time of the year again. The stress over New Year’s plans, the mad hunt for sparkly dresses and the awkward conversation when you have to ask your aunt for a gift receipt. . In between singing the lyrics to Christmas songs you’ve heard too many times and deciding which sparkly dress is sparklier, it’s quite difficult to squeeze in any workout time. Well, you are just in luck. For the past year and some months, I’ve been bringing you my favorite moves to do in home and on the go.

As you begin to scribble down “go to the gym everyday” on your New Year’s Resolutions list, let me help you with my list of favorite Body Blog workouts of all time – ease into the program and let’s get ready for that summer time bikini body! What? Too early for summer? Okay fine…

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By now, January 1^st, 2011 seems like a century ago. I mean, just think about how much has happened – good and bad – in the last five months.  Do you remember those little resolutions you made way back when? You know, when you were feeling optimistic and empowered and you were ready to change your life in 2011? Yeah, you probably gave up on them a long time ago.

And I’m here to get you back on track.

Now, I’m not talking about the resolutions like, “I promise to never drunk text my ex ever again.” Ladies, I’m not some magician here! (And really, who thought that was going to happen? Come on – get realistic!) I’m talking about the first month when you were able to get yourself out of bed at 7 AM, head to spin class and arrive in your Political Science class feeling like a super star. Remember all of that excitement and motivation you had? Where did that go?

If you stopped working out or leading a healthier lifestyle, ask yourself why. Did you get too busy? Did the routine bore you? Pinpoint the exact moment when you stopped sticking to your resolutions and then make a change for the better.

When it comes to fitness resolutions, it’s hard to stick to every little detail. There are days when you may feel tired, a date comes up, or you find any excuse (“Judge Judy is on!”) to justify yourself. But that’s only hindering you, and while it may seem easier to just give up sometimes, sticking to a plan to reach your goal isn’t as hard as you think.

To get the results you want, stop thinking about the “why nots” and start thinking about the “whys.” For example, tell me why you would want to push yourself to do an extra set of planks. It’s just an extra 30 seconds and comes with some amazing long-term benefits: you’re building stamina, discipline and, most obviously, a sexy six pack! Does it hurt when you’re doing it? Sure. Would you rather be lying on the floor polishing off a row of Oreo’s? Probably, but focus on the positive and you’ll remember why you set this goal in the first place.

One other easy thing to do is change your mindset. Look, you don’t have to hit the gym for 2 hours at a time or run a 10k every time you lace up your sneakers. All you have to do is start somewhere, give it 100% and finish strong. Even if you’re working out for a mere 20 minutes, make it the best 20 minutes ever. At the end of the day, 20 minutes is way less daunting and way more beneficial than doing nothing at all.

Stuck in a rut? Check out my workouts here!

If you want to get back on track, just start with a game plan and a strong mind and you’ll be on your way. We’ve got another 7 months of 2011; that’s plenty of time to res-set and reach our goals.

OK, time to sound off! What fitness resolutions did you set? Have you stuck with them? Most importantly, give me your whys! What is it that motivates you to stay fit and maintain a healthy lifestyle? I want to know (and we all need a little reminder)!

So normally, I try to keep the Weekly Ten a positive place. Best kisses. Best boys. Best ways to spend your winter break. But this week, well, that’s just not happening.

I’m not sure if it’s the bad weather or the senioritis or my inability to focus on any one task for more than five minutes at a time, but I’ve been in quite the mood these past few days. And I’m taking my anger out on February, this too short, unproductive, cold, depressing, and generally annoying month.

So here’s why I am officially hating on February.

10. Groundhog Day is a bogus holiday. Yes, okay. So it’s cute to watch a little groundhog crawl out of a whole and get scared by its own shadow. But is this holiday ever actually accurate? I mean, I’m crossing my frozen fingers that this year it will be; there’s nothing I’d love more this year than an early spring….especially after Snowmaggedon 2011.

9. One month closer to midterms. What comes after February? March.  The month of midterms. The month of study sessions and papers and cramming and procrastinating.  The two week long process of trying to relearn everything you’ve already forgotten. February is cruel even as it leaves us.

8. That whole leap year thing. 28 days? 29 days? Make up your mind already! I don’t have time to deal with your identity crisis, February!

7. At the end of this month, my thesis is due.  Like due, due. It has to be done. Finished. Never to be touched by my hands again. And I’m nowhere near ready for that to happen. So for me, February is going to be thesis month, which you know, just completely sucks.

6. Valentine’s Day is horrible. For single girls, married girls, engaged girls and girls in relationships. For the couples of the world Valentine’s Day is an enormous amount of pressure. Do you do the big dinner? The night in? Do you ignore the holiday all together and hope it passes without incident? That’s probably what most single girls are going to do, because for them Valentine’s Day is just the greeting card company’s way of  saying “Sorry you don’t have anyone to buy you chocolate….so spend the next 72 hours gorging on the stuff while watching Lifetime movies and wallowing in your misery.”

5. The Wardrobe sucks. All of the stores are releasing their new spring lines. Floral dresses. Jean skirts. Espadrilles. Wedges. So many cute outfit ideas. But can we wear those outfits? Nope. We’re stuck in baggy coats and layer upon layer of clothing, rain boots and snow boats and hats and scarves that are already standing on their last leg. It was cute once upon a time, way back in December when the winter weather was just beginning, but now I’m sick of it.

4. New Year’s resolutions start to fall apart. They were going strong in January. You were hitting the gym regularly, writing down all your assignments, and totally embracing that whole new year, new you thing. But then February comes along. It’s cold. It’s depressing and it’s overwhelming. Suddenly you have more important things to focus on than your plans to never eat fried food again….like your plans to drink beer and mozzarella sticks, wings and french fries at the Super Bowl party.

3. It’s depressing. You’re upset that you can’t keep your new year’s resolutions. There are no holidays to look forward to. It’s too cold to even consider going out. So all you do is sit home watching reality TV marathons and eating your weight in cookie dough. Which you know, could be fun every once in a while but not for an entire month. And not because you have nothing better to do. February cramps my style. And that’s depressing.

2. It’s winter break month for high schools. Remember in high school, when you used to have a whole week off for President’s Day instead of just the Monday? That was so much fun, wasn’t it? No holidays to take part in. No familial obligations. Just a week home to relax and catch up on some sleep. Yeah, well now we’re in college so we don’t get that anymore. At least, not until March.

1. It’s too cold. It’s icy. It’s raining. It’s freezing. It’s slushy. And I can’t take it anymore. Since January the  temperatures have already dipped below freezing more times than I care to recall. And February will not see the end of this. No, it will see the continuation of this. A very long, very unnecessary continuation that forces me to wear puffer coats and unattractive scarfs and lined rain boots in an attempt to stay warm and dry. And I hate it.

I hate it all.
Is February over yet?

[Check out Jenn's other musings-in-the-form-of-a-list here.]

It’s a new year, and you know what that means; it’s time to start working on those New Year’s resolutions. But before you start jotting down those promises take a minute and really think about this. New Year’s resolutions almost always involve giving something up, and making sacrifices. And that negative approach makes you all the less likely to keep them. Not fun  and definitely not productive. So instead, I’m offering you something a little bit different. Ten New Year’s resolutions that are actually attainable.

And even better, ten New Year’s resolutions you’ll actually want to keep.

10. Be more organized. In order to make any of your other way more interesting New Year’s resolutions happen you should probably commit to this one. Get a planner, or if you prefer, use a Google calendar, or your BlackBerry. (Or I’m sure there’s and iPhone app for that.) Keep track of dates. Make lists. Write down your goals. If you know what you want it’s so much easier to make it happen.

9. Do something you’ve always wanted to do. Everyone has a bucket list, something they’ve always wanted to do but have never had the time, the nerve or the money. This year, make it your resolution to make it happen. Get a tattoo. Learn to speak French. Have sex in the stacks. Whatever it is you’ve always wanted to do, make it happen.

8. Enjoy your family and your friends. We college girls live pretty busy lives, and that makes it difficult to stay in touch with people, even some of the people that matter most. This year, try not to let that happen. Make an effort to do more than just Facebook comment. If being in the same pace at the same time isn’t an option, try a Skype session. Or something they use to do way back when – a phone call.

7. Step outside of your comfort zone. I’ve already told you to do something you’ve always wanted to do. Now I’m telling you to do something you’d never thought you’d do. Grab a friend and go sky diving, or you know, skip a class if that’s more on your level. Just do something different.

6. Make healthier choices. Every year women makes resolution after resolution about losing weight, cutting out the carbs, and exercising every single day. But crash diets don’t work, and denying yourself something only makes you want it more. That doesn’t mean you should live off of Cherry Garcia and Raman noodles either, though. So start small. Exercise three times a week. Switch to whole wheat breads. Limit your ice cream intake to one night a week. Just make simple, healthier choices.

5. Stop counting calories. So now that you’re making healthier choices, one of the best resolutions you can make is to stop counting calories. It’s tedious and impossible to keep up with and takes all the enjoyment out of going for drinks or eating out. So stop with the calorie counting. You’re making healthier choices and that’s the more important thing.

4. Find some fabulous female role models. Nothing against, LiLo and co. but most of the women that are in the spotlight these days aren’t exactly role models. So start searching. Find some old school actress, some kickass women in the political sector, some awesome business women. Or even someone you already know. (Hi, Mom.) Get inspired by their accomplishments and set your own goals to work towards.

3. Splurge on something extravagant. Well, maybe not so much splurge, but rather save up for it. Instead of spending that hard earned money or that quickly pocketed holiday cash on little things, save it up for something substantial. Then, three months, six months, nine months, or even a year from now you’ll have the money saved when you really, really want something. Like those cute boots, that new i-Pod, or if you’re really ambitious, that new laptop. So save first, and then splurge.

2. Focus on you. A little shallow? Maybe. But also just a little bit necessary, and completely attainable. Stop the distraction and make sure you indulge in a little me time every now and then. Go for a manicure. Take a bubble bath. Shut off your cell phone for an hour. Everyone needs a little time to recharge. And after some rest and relaxation it will make it so much easier to focus on everything else that needs to be done.

1. Enjoy yourself. All the time. Alright, so the “all the time” part might not really be all that attainable. (I mean, you can’t exactly be expected to enjoy yourself during a three hour lecture.) But you should try to enjoy yourself whenever you can it. Be a little irresponsible. Do things you probably shouldn’t because you’re in college and you can. It will be over before you know it (Spoken as a second semester senior.), so enjoy it while you can.

What are your resolutions this year?

[The following post was written by dating coach, Kira Sabin, a keg of dating and relationship wisdom. She's been helping people find love for years so we thought we'd tap this keg and see what sort of brilliant advice she has for the CollegeCandy readers. Drink up, ladies.]

Ah resolutions… Once the hangover is done by the 2^nd and you are seriously bored at home, nothing seems more perfect than to sit down, contemplate your life and make some resolutions for 2011.  With passion in heart and pen in hand we write down our best intentions for the New Year promising ourselves that “Things Will Be Different!” The problem is that most of the time by January 5^th that new fitness program, study routine or other resolution has already been kicked to the curb.  About as long as it takes to make our resolutions, we have already hooked up with our ex, ate a full pie and were way too busy to exercise since we had to re-watch the last season of Greek on demand. What?!  I love me some Cappie.

To make you feel a little better, only about 12% of people who make resolutions actually follow through on them, so you are in good company.  I would, however,  be a pretty sucky life coach if I congratulated you on your lack of commitment.  I do believe it is important to stop and take stock of your life occasionally and look at what changes need to happen to get us in our happy place (mine has roller coasters and unicorns).  I also believe in this area of your life it is OK to bring on the lazy.

Let me explain.  The person who has decided to add 5 push- ups a day when they wake up is probably going to complete that goal rather than the person who has decided to work out 5 days a week.  At the end of the year, 1,825 push-ups is nothing to scoff at and the feeling of accomplishment is WAY more important than the push-ups.  When we continue to set ourselves up for failure we create a mentality where we stop trying new things in worry that we will only fail again.  This mindset can be paralyzing in life and especially relationships, so ….here is a simple, you-don’t-even-have-to-get-out-of-your-pajamas resolution.

Kick your bad attitude to the curb.

That’s right, young lady, I am talking to you.  In the last year of getting to know college women I am devastated (overdramatic, but true) by the amount of women who already over it.  Giving up.  Done and done.  Somebody hurt them, usually because they never asked for what they wanted or even knew what they wanted anyway because they never sat down and looked at what felt good and what didn’t.

I don’t care if it hasn’t worked in the past. This year you will do it and do it right!  I want you to start with an actual clean slate.  So here is my question for you:  What is your attitude about dating, love and relationships and where is it getting you?  Have you ever bought into any of these dating myths?

All the good ones are taken.
All guys are douche bags.
None of them want to commit.
They only want one thing.

Here is a thought: If you didn’t believe in other areas of your life, would they survive and prosper?  If you didn’t think you could get a college degree, would you?   If you didn’t believe you could have good friends, could you? I am a true believer that if you believe (even if it is somewhere deep down) that no one is out there, then no one will be out there.  We are our own self-fulfilling prophecy.

One of the best parts of life is that we get to choose.  Choose our attitude, choose whom we are friends with, choose our major and even choose who we date.

If you are frustrated by the people you have been meeting/hooking up with, take a moment to realize that you had a choice to pick that person, kiss them and have them be a part of your life.  It was your choice to decide how quickly you got involved, when you become intimate, how much to share, how much to listen.  You were one half of that relationship and ALWAYS had control of your role in it.  As my Grandma always said, if you point your finger at someone you have three pointing back at you.

Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the crap, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose what to expect from them.  You choose whether to share that expectation.  You choose how people will affect your day. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. Bad things are going to happen, but we can choose to be a victim or to learn from it. The bottom line: It’s your choice how you live life.

Your Dating Makeover Challenge:

Sit down over the next couple of days and make a promise to yourself to get lazy. There are no push-ups, weird diet restrictions or even a need to leave the couch.  Just the time to recognize when the toxic thoughts creep in to replace them with thoughts that are actually getting you somewhere.  The belief that you are truly lovable and deserve a relationship where you are respected, appreciated and loved.  That you have love to give and that someone will want it.  Create a phrase that is your default that takes over the crabby Christy in your head that love IS possible in your life.   Have your friends keep you accountable when you feel like giving up.  Know in your heart of hearts that if you are willing to stay positive, set healthy boundaries, let down that wall and actually make it happen, it can. I believe in you, but that is not enough.  You have to believe and once you do, a whole new world can open up.

Embrace that lazy.

Need help to get ready for love? Get all of Kira’s advice right here. Or check out Crush Camp on Kira’s new college love advice site www.thecollegecrush.com.  It’s the second best thing you will ever do.

So her are my totally dope freshman year resolutions:

- I will become more globally aware: You guys, I know some of us (me included) set New York Times as our homepage and then, as soon as we get on the internet, our eyes glaze over at the mention of any word like “security” or “Iraq” and then we’re just like “Whateva,” and read Perez instead. Totally guilty of this. However, knowing your current global events is kind of a big deal—you always have an intelligent conversation topic to keep in your back pocket and you gain so much perspective on your own life—just how good you have it, and just how much plight really is out there. It’s easy to ignore it, but this year, I will dive into it.

- I will keep up appearances: I think I’m getting better at this overall, but this next year especially, I am vowing to stay away from the sweatpants and the not-washing-my-face-before-bed-because-I’m-too-tired excuse. Looking good helps me to access my swagger, both while doing Spanish homework and shaking my thang on the dance floor. Plus, looking good makes an impact on anyone around you—just see how intense (read: AWESOME) UBS’s dress code is for their employees in Switzerland!

- I will volunteer more: My school is in the middle of a city. Volunteer opportunities are all around me, and it’s not like I don’t have time to help out anywhere. I was so overwhelmed first semester that I didn’t really do anything and I feel like a lump of horse poop because of it. No more of that, ladies and gentleman; I will give back to the community this semester.

- I will get a job: Let’s be honest, I just need the ca$h money. Cute outfits don’t grow on trees, you know.

- I will phase out some freshman awkwardness: Whenever I’m “new,” social awkwardness is totally my thing. Sometimes I just have no idea what to say, and then I freak out that people will think I’m too serious, or too raunchy, or too whatever, and then I have even less of an idea what to say. It’s tragic, really. I need to start working harder to phase that out.

More than anything though, my brother’s friend, Time magazine writer Ishaan Tharoor, gave me ballin’ advice: Always be busy. And so that is my ultimate goal. No more floundering and loafing around for me. To (sorta) quote Disney’s Mulan—Let’s get down to business y’all.

I will not talk to my ex. Unless if it’s birthday….or our anniversary…or a Friday night….right? Then it’s only polite to give him a call.

I will not procrastinate studying. Except when there is something way more important going on, like eavesdropping on my roommate’s conversation with her mom. Fascinating stuff.

I will limit partying to once a week. As long as we all agree not to count Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays, and “special occasions.”

I will go to lecture everyday. Minus days when the weather is bad. Oh and days when I feel under the weather. Or also, I guess, on days when Weather.com says there’s more than a 10% chance of rain.

I will save more money. Unless there is an emergency, like when that amazing pair of shoes is about to get snatched up by an evil, skinny girl with perfect hair. Then it’s just a matter of doing the right thing.

I will not eat candy. Before the dentist. Like the day before I go to the dentist, I will not eat candy.

I will work out every day. But I’ll also expand the definition of work out to include any physical movement. Like bed to couch to kitchen to couch to bathroom to couch.

I will not drink soda. Except when I need a chaser or a mixer or a shot of caffeine.

I will not check Facebook more than once a day. Unless someone tagged really bad photos. Then I really have no choice but to sign on. My dignity is at stake!