During the first couple of blogs in this series, some people were a bit miffed at our “judgemental” and “harsh” treatment of the creator of a certain Missed Connection. Here at CC, we thought he exhibited Type A Stalker Behavior. Other people thought he was just a misunderstood guy who wasn’t quite up to date on how to use an exclamation point.

All differences aside (aren’t they what makes the world go around, anyway? Of course!), I believe those Nice Guy Vigilantes will have a hard time saying stuff about this recent CL Posting.

This post comes from a 63 year old M4W in Long Island. It’s titled “Little One“.

Are you creeped out yet? You should be.

“I am still disappointed that we couldn’t get it together last Fall.”

Really? Still disappointed? It’s Spring, dude. You’ve been feeling disappointed for 7 months about a liaison that happened last Fall? Let me flip through my Weird Stalker Dictionary and see if this…ah, yes! Right here. It says you should MOVE ON.

“Your behind could have been hot and red all this time.” Read More »

I am not good with confrontation. I am, however, quite good at ignoring the situation at hand. If you ignore something long enough, it goes away, right? So far, my theory has been working just fine.

A few months ago, I went on two dates with a perfectly nice guy. There was nothing wrong with him. In fact, on paper, he was very much my type. But the sparks weren’t there and I just wasn’t very excited by him. So, when he called for a third date, I didn’t answer. He called again and I didn’t answer again. I picked up the phone several times to call him back, but then I just didn’t.

I went to my friends for help and they offered a variety of different opinions. Some of my friends said I should just call him and say my schedule suddenly got busy and I didn’t know when I would be free. Some said to call and be honest telling him I just wasn’t feeling it. And some claimed it was OK for me not to return his calls. “He’ll get the point,” they said. “And nobody has to be made uncomfortable.” Not one to make people uncomfortable, I took their advice and continued not calling him.

After attempting one more phone call to me, he got the point and didn’t call again. My life went on. Sometimes when I think about it, I feel like a bad person, but I try to remind myself that I saved us both a great deal of discomfort.

So what that I live in constant fear I could run into him at any point? I took the easy way out and it’s better for now. I’ll worry about seeing him when I see him.

Now excuse me while I hide behind this lamppost.

My girlfriends are always freakin’ out about dudes. And I can’t really blame them. After all, it is rare that you find a grown up one. And it is even more rare that you find an emotionally available one. (Who is also grown up).

It’s no wonder that so many girls obsess over the contact and signals they receive from a guy they have recently met or started a sort of relationship with. After all, this is usually a guy’s chance to pull out every asshole card he has. And how the hell are girls supposed to read that?

Either you’re dealing with a genuine asshole… Or you’re dealing with a nice guy who’s playing his asshole cards to win his upper hand with you.

And lets face it, if you catch the nice guy who is playing the nice cards…well, we never want that guy, anyway.

So how do you get him to drop his horseshit facade and call you back when YOU want him to call back?

Well, there are actually some pretty basic things to keep in mind: Read More »

“I’m a nice guy” he looked at me a little helplessly, “and that doesn’t always work out in my favor.”

Smiling, I ran my hand through his hair reassuringly and tried to figure out how I was going to tell him we were over.

I broke up with Chad* (name changed to protect his pride. And mine.) because he was a Republican who only listened to talk radio and read nothing but Forbes Magazine, not because he was a self-proclaimed “nice guy”. Contrary to popular opinion, I have nothing against “nice guys”. I have nothing against polite, chivalrous, thoughtful dudes.

But you know what I do have a problem with?

Socially awkward behavior.

More often than not, a guy who insists he gets no respect because he’s just “too nice” is totally discounting the fact that he is also weird. Read More »