"This worries me...."

Well, it took an entire season but after going home with the top 3 designers – Meana Irina, Giggles Hannah and Hometown Althea –  I think I’m finally invested in Project Runway. Though that might have nothing to do with what the girls are actually working on and more to do with watching Tim Gunn first in a flowery apron and then trying to work that old elevator in Althea’s building. Seriously, seeing the fear in his eyes as he stepped into that death-trap really made all the time I invested in this season worth it.

I mean, really, who says, “Gads!”?

Those Lifetime people really shoveled a lot of sh*t into last night’s one-hour episode. First Tim goes home to check in on the contestants, then the contestants come to New York, then they get feedback from Tim AND Nina AND Michael AND Heidi, then they do a model casting, then they get assigned a 13^th look and then Carol Hannah gets stuck with Christopher. Oh, and she’s barfy.

Whew. I get tired just thinking about it all. But I’m also super excited by everyone’s collections – yes, even Irina. But that might only be because I think her dog is super cute and I’m like a puddle of goo in the face of a little white fluff ball. Although I do think her whole t-shirt-under-something-chic idea rocks (even if I did do a fist-pump of joy when Tim made her re-do them all). What can I say? The girl’s got just as much talent as ‘tude. And that’s a lot.

Althea’s collection is a little different than I expected of her (did anyone expect her to go home and watch a lot of Sci-fi??), but I still sorta dig it. And I don’t care what Tim thinks about that sequined jacket-y thing; Althea made that a year ago and sequins are all the rage now. Either she can see into the future or homegirl is a fashion genius. Read More »

Much like my relationship with pie (love the pie…hate the 3 hours I spend in the gym after eating it), I am experiencing a bit of a love/hate with Irina. On the one hand, she’s a Jew (and a proud one, flaunting it in all its blingin’ glory) and we Jews gotta stick together. If we don’t support our own people, who will?

And homegirl sure knows how to make a faux fur vest. That thing was gorgeous. Although I might be biased considering it was a blustery 38 degrees and rainy when I got home last night. But, still, I wanted to make Irina my new BFF and cozy up inside that vest until April. Or, in the Midwest, July.

But, and there’s always a but, Irina is a big, fat bitch. She’s arrogant, she’s mean, she’s judgmental….and just like 40% of the girls in my high school. The girls I gave the finger to as I pulled out of the parking lot that last day and swore never to see again. The girls who pretend to be confident only to cover up some raging insecurity. Perhaps Irina hates the annoying way she talks? Or she was on the flag team in high school and never got over it?

I don’t know, but she’s a cold-hearted snake.

Although, I guess you can’t totally fault this girl for the things she says. She’s kinda like Kanye (minus the whole Hennessey thing); she is simply saying what everyone else is thinking. And maybe if she was a bit wittier in her insults (a la Michael Kors) we wouldn’t care who she was talking smack about.

And we all know there is plenty of smack to be talked with some of these designers. Read More »

I have to admit – it’s becoming somewhat painful to watch Project Runway this season and find things to write about. Unlike seasons past where designers say and do funny things beyond whipping up runway looks, all things more than worthy of writing about, this season is a whole lot of blah. And it’s impossible to write about blah.

Perhaps that’s why the producers decided to bring in Bob Mackie and Christina Aguilera last night. Maybe a little sequins would liven things up a bit?

Too bad it didn’t work. I mean, absolutely nothing about this challenge worked. The designers were instructed to take some inspiration from Mr. Mackie and go all out on a stage design for Christina Aguilera. CHRISTINA FREAKING AGUILERA. A woman known for her strong voice and her awesomely choreographed shows.

Not a woman known for living in a cave and tearing meat from dead animal carcasses with her teeth, Logan.

And not a woman who is currently retired and heading to the Assisted Living Annual Ball, Jordana.

I’d like to think that in a subconscious homage to their good friend Epperson, the designers misunderstood Tim Gunn’s assignment. Maybe they were struck dumb by all of Bob Mackie’s brilliance and instead of hearing “Christina” they heard “Junior Prom in the Midwest”? All that sparkle. All that glitz. Seriously, I walked away for a minute to grab a snack during the show and missed the part where the designers got their assignment. When I came back in and saw what everyone was picking up at Mood, I thought this was a crossover event with TLC’s Toddlers in Tiaras.

It was just bad. Almost as bad as Irina’s bitchy attitude. Almost. That girl is one big biznatch. And that ice skating costume she made? Hurl. Read More »

OMFG.

Project Runway is finally coming back tomorrow night. They’ve kept us waiting for-freaking-ever and now it’s all coming back in a MAJOR way.

…with a few slight changes.

The show will still have supermodel Heidi Klum, fashion designer Michael Kors, and Elle fashion director Nina Garcia returning as judges, as well as the additional guest judge each episode. But after five seasons in pedestrian-friendly New York, the hit reality competition for aspiring fashion designers has moved to both a new city, car-jammed Los Angeles at the Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising, and a new network, Lifetime. And now that the lawsuits between the Weinstein Company, NBC Universal (owner of Bravo), and Lifetime are thankfully over, we can enjoy our fashion porn in peace once again.

Like most, I was a little peeved when PR left Bravo, but the new star-studded L.A. setting has provided some amazing new opportunities: major guest judges such as Christina Aguilera, Eva Longoria Parker, Rebecca Romijn, and Lindsay Lohan and some fresh inspirations for new challenges. As Michael Kors has hinted, ”L.A. can be the most laid-back and the most glamorous. It’s the land of bikinis and gowns.” As such, this season the designers will take on challenges centered on the beach and the red carpet, and also create garments as a tribute to movies and Hollywood.

I am still not quite over the fact that I have to watch Lifetime (the same network my mom boasts as her fav), but I gotta say: I’m really excited to see what this new season has to offer. Read More »

Tonight was a big night with big decisions: Do I watch the presidential debate, or do I watch the highly anticipated season finale of Project Runway?

It was a difficult choice, but I did both. And after almost 3 hours of TV, my ass is asleep.

The season finale of PR was the same as always: model castings, dog poop, rushed and stressed designers backstage, “OH MY GOD THIS IS MY MOMENT”s, and then the big show.

When the main event finally arrived I got a little excited (although that could have just been the effects of the obscene amounts of coffee I chugged to make it through the night). I was really pulling for Korto – she was my favorite all along – but couldn’t wait to see what Leanne marched down the super-long runway. And, maybe, I was curious about Kenley’s collection.

And for the first time all season I was not disappointed. (If you opted for the debate, you can catch the collections here.)

The collections were all really beautiful, even Kenley’s. Each designer came through in their own unique way and I actually found myself saying (out loud!), “I’d wear that!” “I’d totally wear that!” “OMG I NEED TO BUY THAT OFF OF BLUEFLY.” (The product placement worked!)

Warning: Spoiler after the jump. I repeat: spoiler after the jump!

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I never really thought about it before, but being a member of any reality show for an extended period has to make you go crazy. All that competition, all those cameras, all that drama…

And tonight it seems the pressure has finally gotten to Jerell. The dude hit the crazy wall and kept on running. I mean he was talking to fruit and syrup. And he wore a shirt so low that I kept seeing his nips. And that straw hat? What is with him and the hats? Is he channeling Justin Bobby?

But Jerell isn’t the only one goin’ batsh*t insane; it seems that I may be going crazy myself. For a brief moment I actually felt bad for Kenley. No, not because she left her tulle or because her dress looked like something that was more appropriate for the Drag Challenge; I felt bad cuz the girl is an outsider (and I always feel bad for outsiders!).

The poor girl grew up on a tugboat. It’s not her fault she’s a disrespectful and arrogant bitch; whom has she ever interacted with besides a bunch of seamen?

But don’t worry; as soon as that biatch started talkin’ sh*t about the other designers I turned off my feelings and moved on. She sucks and I couldn’t wait to see what the judges thought of her scaley stripper dress. Read More »

Last night’s episode of Project Runway really made Lauren happy. Lauren is all about saving the environment, so Lauren was super excited when she found out the challenge was to use Green fabrics to create cocktail dresses. Lauren wants a Green cocktail dress!

Other things Lauren wants: the BlueFly accessories wall in her bedroom, a lunch date with Heidi Klum and for Suede to stop freaking speaking in third person.

But let’s get back to the show (and first person).

This week’s challenge was twofold. Not only would the designers be using eco friendly fabrics, but the models would be purchasing them. Oooooo. I am sure that threw a little wrench in everyone’s plans, but didn’t really become an issue for anyone except Stella. Not because the model came back with some hideous fabric, but because the model came back without leather.

Stella LOVES leather. She would make anything in leather! She would make pants in leather, hats in leather, dresses in leather. If only leather wasn’t the WORST THING FOR THE PLANET, Stella. I mean, seriously. Leather is not only a major fashion mistake (unless you are going to a Bon Jovi concert), it just totally goes against everything this challenge is about.

So, anyhoo….the designers start doing their thang with the stuff and some random shite goes down. Some people almost can’t finish their garments, some people are still making up words (enough with the ‘icious…seriously), some people think others are copying them and Tim Gunn thinks one designers dress has the potential to be a HOT MESS. Yes, he actually said that. He totes misses Christian! Read More »

Welcome back, Tim Gunn! Oh, and the rest of you Project Runway people. I can’t tell you how excited I am to have my favorite show back. I even went out to Happy Hour and had a few beers (and a giant plate of fries) to celebrate!

I missed the actual premiere, but caught it on my DVR, which is better anyway…no commercials! Anyways, like every year, the first episode kicked off with us meeting the new designers. I could write my feelings about all of them, but instead I will let you learn about them here. It is a lot less biased (because I am a judgemental bitch)…and there also happen to be just too many for me to remember.

After unpacking their things in their lovely new apartments (girls in one, a large group of gay men – and one straight guy who wants EVERYONE to know it by talking about his daughters – in the other) the designers head up to the roof for a party with Tim and Heidi. Champagne is opened, people talk and everyone tries to impress Ms. Heidi Klum.

And then they have their first challenge: The Gristedes challenge. Read More »

There is nothing I look forward to on TV more than Project Runway. Perhaps that’s because there is literally nothing else to look forward to thanks to the Writers Guild of America. But last nights Project Runway may have been one of my most favorite episodes yet. Why? Because my FAVORITE two flaming fashionistas, Chris and Christian (or as they named themselves: Team Fierce) were paired up for the challenge.

The contestants were split at random into groups of two. The challenge: To create both an Avant Garde and ready to wear look.

There is nothing that I love more than Christian’s monstrous ego and Chris’ teddy bear looks (and adorable laugh). Their outfits were absolutely amazing (even prim and prissy Nina Garcia agreed!)

Victorya and Jillian may just be the two most boring, monotone people I have ever seen on TV in my life. So imagine the bore-fest it was watching them try and fight over who was going to be project manager. I write in my journal with more enthusiasm- and that’s on paper. There is no denying their talent, especially Jillian’s, but really ladies. You’re on TV. You’re trying to become the next big designer- you think you would turn the personality up a notch? A giggle every now and again? Ending your sentence with an exclamation point?

Just a thought. Read More »

Were you pumped with a capital P like I was when Wednesday night rolled around?

Well dear readers, I am sorry for building the excitement.

I had high expectations for the season opener of Project Runway… so imagine my disappointment when the only exciting thing that happened in the entire hour, was when the ‘one with nature/something is a tad bit off’ gal Elisa, got down and dirty with her fabric on the grass. So not what I expected.

Not to mention, the awful dress that she paired with the even more awful boots. Why did Nina and Michael not slam that choice pairing? I could barely keep my dinner down seeing the high slit front with the matchy-matchy-eww boots. You call that fashion?

Rami’s Grey Dress and Christian’s plaid jacket/high waisted skirt were winners in my book (book/blog – whatever) and some of the other contestants had spunk and funk. I have faith they will deliver both the drama and exquisite dresses.

And we must discuss: how bad did you feel for Chris who could barely run across the grass to the tent? I just wanted to hug him and give him a Twinkie for his efforts. Last time I checked, this show was about fashion, so imagine his surprise when he was told to haul-ass across a lawn, obviously thinking to himself, “Is this Project Runway or was I tricked into joining the Biggest Loser?” Read More »