College made life so easy. Seriously. I was effortlessly plopped onto a large mass of land with tons of people my age who had the same goals (AKA make it to class and survive finals week sober). Then, college provided all of us with a giant room to eat (cafeteria), a giant room to nurse a hangover and take naps on tables (library) and a giant neighborhood to spend our weekends guzzling weird combinations of booze and Juicy Juice (off campus housing).

College was a large Biodome for easy mistakes, debauchery, learning and living. And now that I’ve been out of college for a while, a few things have become irresistibly harder to accomplish without this grand ol’ biodome of easy living. I’ve dealt with the following combo platter of difficulties in the real world, and in every situation I contemplated ripping my hair out. They get harder to cope with, people! And I’m going to make up this silly excuse that it’s because I’m growing up.

Here are a few things I’m having a tough time dealing with nowadays:

1. Hangovers

ARE SO HARD. My body is no longer programmed to handle them by hitting the gym and sweating out vodka collins on the tread. Instead, I plop down on the couch and with every pulse, feel the rotting of death inside of me. It’s that bad. In college, a simple Vitamin Water would ease the pain. Now, I have to go through a series of healing tactics (googling pictures of hot men, chugging coconut water, calling my mom and crying, eating tons of pizza, taking walks and constantly complaining).

2. Naps

NEVER WORK. In my head, they sound amazing — especially those first five minutes at work. I sit and imagine lying on one of those blue mats they have in preschools and get queasy thinking about sleep. But if I actually try to close my eyes, my mind is a battle field of thoughts and worries. No sleep for the weary. To top it off, when I wake up from a 30-minute snoozer, I feel like DEATH. Maybe my REM sleep has gotten more intense, mystery behold. Whatever it is, it’s painful.

3. ‘No Strings Attached’ Relationships

CAN’T EXIST. Probably because they don’t begin at a college dive bar and end on a futon. If you try to have one, it ends up feeling desperate and ridiculous. When someone tells me where I can go to snatch up a casual bedtime relationship aside from CraigsList (with a risk of not getting murdered), please hit me up!

4. Natural Oil Hair Treatments

AKA NEVER SHOWERING. Try going to work with greasy hair and a bitter scalp scent. It’s not going to work. And you’re not going to work either once you get fired. In college, I went days without showering. Gross? No, natural.

5. Finding My Inner Self on Google

IS NO LONGER THERAPEUTIC. I remember the days when I used to spend hours on google…image searching hot men, searching myself, getting dirt/hair styling information from celebrities. Now, I just get stressed out by all of the things I should be doing instead. Ugh, real world problems.

6. Vodka Shots

CAN’T BE DONE. I have no idea how I used to cheers my girlfriends and tip back anything that remotely tasted like nail polish remover. Now, I see a bottle of vodka and get that feeling in my chest. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you need to go live with no regrets. Or have a lot of them and just accept it.

Either way, I’m proud of my college days–and won’t forget all of those moments when I could handle vodka, spontaneous hook-ups, long pointless hours on the internet, being dirty, in depth naps and Thirsty Thursdays. Keep it hush, hush — but it all still leaks into the post grad years. Things just get a little more difficult to endure.

Dormcest, especially floorcest, was quite the epidemic my freshman year. For the first month, I just didn’t get it. It was like making out with your closest friend. Didn’t anyone feel awkward? Weren’t they weirded out by it? Wasn’t it bizarre to be (essentially) sharing a room with the person you’re hooking up with? Maybe I was naive, but I voted yes.

Well, I thought that at least until I fell into the same trap. The boy who lived next door to me (thanks for the CoEd floors UD!), and I had quite a tumultuous relationship. At first, I thought he was annoying. A stereotypically D1 football player, with a fast car, loud music and constant stream of people coming in and out of his room to hang out. He was soo not my type. That is, until he was. I’ll spare you the details, but we started hooking up fairly regularly. We spent so much time together, we were practically married. We’d go to the dining hall together, run errands at Target together or even just study together. It just worked. But the tricky part about dormcest was, we weren’t dating.

Usually in a non-exclusive relationship, your mind does all of the assumption making, not your ears. But when you’re committing dormcest, your ears get a workout too. I would hear his door shut at 3am and wonder if some random girl was over or if he just got up to wander around. I was driving myself crazy. And on top of that, whatever I didn’t want to know usually came back to me via some rumor on the floor. Everyone always was up in each others business. All of the emotions of freshman year were over-intensified based on the position I put myself in.

In my case, everything ended amicably. I still speak to him all the time, but now instead of having this not-dating-but-we-act-like-we-are-married relationship, we talk about things like our jobs, cars and his (ugh) girlfriend. We’re close, and it’s great, but don’t think that everything was super happy-go-lucky all the time.

Dormcest is convenient. It’s fun, no-strings-attached and so…college. I mean, I only had to walk-of-shame 10 feet to my own door. How much better could it get?

But freshman, before you start playing just the tips with your entire floor, just be weary of your own emotions. Be careful, it’s easier than any other “relationship” I’ve ever been in to get hurt. With that said, have fun, go crazy. Just maybe, stay away from the RA.

What are your experiences with dormcest? Any tips for the new kids?

Unless you’ve been Justin Timberlake’s biggest fan since 1998 or unless you’ve got a major girl crush on Mila Kunis, I don’t know why anyone would dish out $10 to see Friends with Benefits at the theaters this week. Sure, it’s not the first time Hollywood has tried to get two movies out of the same plot, but I can’t figure out how this movie could be any different from No Strings Attached.

To be honest, both movies remind me of some weird Black Swan crossover fan fiction. It’s like the two girls from Black Swan got sick of fooling around with each other in their dreams, so they decided to test out the other side of life by sleeping with two of the hottest men on the planet — but without commitment. Actually, if that really were the plot, I think I’d be more inclined to watch.

The thing that I really don’t understand is how No Strings Attached came out only a few months ago, which means that both these movies were being filmed around the same time. How did none of the producers notice that another big studio was filming practically the same movie?

Eh, oh well. Even though I probably won’t make the time to help out Friends with Benefits at the box office, I’ll probably pick it up on DVD in a few months when I’m feeling bored one night. Instead of comparing the plot quality and script of the two, I’ll probably pick my favorite based on who looks better with their shirt off: Ashton or Justin.

And in the meantime, seriously, check out all the other movies that ripped each other off!

So, how casual is your sex life? You’d be surprised to know that 8 out of every 10 women up to the age of 63 have had at least one casual sex encounter. Sheesh, that’s a lot of hooking up! Lots of girls are taking part in this no strings attached lifestyle, and they’re revealing all the juicy details in this latest survey from TrésSugar & Self Magazine. For climax confessions and one-night-stands gallore, check out the survey results for yourself. Happy humping!

Prep your purse
Besides your phone, camera, keys, and wallet, there are a few other things you may want to pack in your clutch. Like condoms. Under no circumstances is this trashy or tacky. It is a completely responsible and admirable thing to do. Other people, especially strangers, may not have any regard for your health, but you definitely should. To avoid that grungy morning-after feeling, throw in a mini tube of deodorant, some breath stripes and a pack of wipes.

Get a second opinion
Obviously, your sex life is ultimately your own business, but it might be a good idea to have someone else confirm your prospect’s attractiveness (those vodka soda goggles fall off at the most inopportune times), and gauging level of availability (maybe your best friend sees that guy every day…canoodling with the same person in the student union). At the very least, make sure someone else knows where you’re going, not only for safety concerns but also for the sake of your friends not frantically having to search for you at last call when you peaced out an hour before.

Open yourself up
I would never deny the importance of boundaries. Having them is incredibly empowering and strengthens your sense of security and control, and engaging in a one night stand does not invalidate your right to set boundaries at all. At the same time though, one of the great things about a one night stand is the freedom to do things you wouldn’t normally do. So go for it. Practice your dirty talk, try a new position, let go of some of your inhibitions. One night stands are about pure, unadulterated, stringless pleasure, so make the most of it.

Don’t beat yourself up afterward
One of the things I struggled with when I was engaging in casual hookups was an overwhelming sense of self-loathing. I would wonder why these guys didn’t like me and I would question my self-worth because I internalized some of the insanity our slut shamey culture propagates on a regular basis. I felt like I was leaving pieces of myself with guys I’d never talk to again and I didn’t feel comfortable with that at all.

I eventually came to the conclusion that one night stands aren’t personally my cup of tea, and maybe you’re the same way. Regardless, I learned a lot about myself that I might not have learned had I not hooked up with those randoms, so I ultimately don’t regret anything I did. And as for that feeling of “incompleteness,” I realized that I was attaching too many expectations to these particular sexual experiences. There are times when sex should be laden with emotions and significance…and one night stands are not it. They’re bursts of superficial pleasure, and that’s fine. Sometimes you want a gourmet meal and sometimes you want McDonalds, but when you start assigning gourmet ideals to a Big Mac, that’s when your feelings get hurt.

Having casual sex is a perfectly valid lifestyle choice and there’s no reason to be ashamed, so I fully support taking as many steps as you can to ensure it is as enjoyable as it can be. The walk of shame, however; well, you’re on your own for that one.

The random hook up. Probably the only thing more common at a college party than drunk people screaming to Journey. That’s why people are there, isn’t it? That’s why we girls spend hours picking out outfits that are sexy without being too slutty, and risking third degree burns with a flat iron.

We want guys to want us. And we want them to want us now.

I’m a big fan of the random hook up. Obviously, I’d prefer a more constant booty call in my life (read: a boyfriend), but there’s nothing wrong with sharing the milk while I wait for someone to buy the cow. I love the challenge of seeking out what I want (the guy in the worn-in baseball cap) and getting it (in my bed). And quite honestly, sometimes a girl’s got needs, ya know? Sometimes I just need a little pleasure in my life that doesn’t come from the fro yo machine and unlimited sprinkles in the caf. And by “sometimes” I obviously mean “when I’m drinking.”

That being said, I’m not gonna go home with just anybody. I have standards, thank you very much. And just because those standards get a little lower when I’m wearing the beer goggles (which I don’t realize until after the fact, of course; I always think the guy is sexy until I wake up in the morning) doesn’t mean I’m going to do the horizontal mambo with anything that happens to have man parts.

When it comes to hooking up, I like to like the person I’ll be spending the evening with. I know it seems weird, being that we’re only gonna be humping for a few minutes (most likely) and then passing out, but there’s gotta be attraction there. He’s gotta make me laugh as we stand by the keg waiting to fill our Solo cups. He’s gotta have a sexy smile that gives me butterflies. He’s got to be holding a drink that isn’t girlier than mine. He’s gotta do or be something that makes me want to go home with him in the first place. It doesn’t matter how determined I am to hook up, if the guy isn’t offering more than a semi-working penis (thank you, Four Loko), I’m not gonna get with him just because he’s there and/or grinding his boner into my back.

If I just wanted to get off, well, I could do that myself… and not have to do the walk of shame in the morning.

For me, the hookup is about more than just the orgasm. (Probably because hooking up with a drunk college guy rarely guarantees that.) It’s about the excitement of it all, the fun. What’s fun and exciting about hooking up with just anybody? Who can get all hot and bothered for a guy they’re not attracted to in any way, shape or level of intoxication? And who wants to wake up in the morning and have to explain to her roommates why the bald guy with the gold tooth just walked through the living room?

I’m a lady. A respectable lady. A catch. I’m not going to give just any random creature access to this [sweeps hands over body]. What do I look like, a public drinking fountain?

But that doesn’t seem to be the case for the dudes of the world. Check out what they have to say on the subject at CoedMagazine.com.

In honor of Women’s History Month, CollegeCandy has decided to spotlight some of the world’s most influential women. Last week we focused on the women from our generation and this week, we pay attention to some of the most spectacular thirty-somethings. These are the women that show us life really does get interesting in your 30s, whether you’re a famous movie star or activist. Anything can happen, and just like these women have done in their 30s, we can make a difference in the world at any age.

[He Said/She Said is a new series designed to help all our wonderfully confused readers figure out what he’s really thinking. So every week we’ll be throwing out a topic for debate…and unlike our fave dude, these guys won’t be sugar coating anything for you. But before you jump into their heads (which seriously will make you feel like you need to shower), check out what we think!]

For many students, college, like Las Vegas, is the land of indulgence. From the all-you-can-eat buffets in the cafeteria to the endless kegs at house parties, if you want something, you got it. Here. Now. Until you burst (or barf).

And that goes for hooking up, too. Never again in our lives will we be in a place brimming with single and ready to mingle people, oftentimes fueled by keg beer and cheap vodka. If you wanna get some, you don’t need to go far. In fact, if you’re lucky, you don’t even need to leave your dorm/apartment building/street.

Yes, I’m talking about dormcest (or whatever you call it when you hook up with your next door neighbor).

It seems like the perfect idea: no long walks for booty, no long walks of shame after booty, it’s not some random, and he or she has probably already seen you lookin’ a hot mess in the morning, so you don’t have to worry about that whole morning hair thing.

But let’s get one thing straight here: it is NOT A GOOD IDEA.

Mind you, I’ve never done it (something about watching a guy walk to the bathroom with a Playboy in his hand sorta kills the sex appeal), but I’ve watched as 6 of my 7 housemates have…with 5 of the 8 guys next door. Yes, math majors, that means that some people were doubling up. And yes, it made things as uncomfortable as you can imagine.

Now, I get the appeal of it all, but what I don’t get is why you have to sh*t where you sleep when there are so many other places to sh*t on campus. OK, so that’s not the best analogy, but you get what I’m saying. If you stop and think about it for a split second (which I’m sure most people – especially guys – don’t do), you’ll realize just how wrong this is.

Why cause potential (or inevitable) drama when where are so many other Mr. Flinstones out there who are able and so very willing to make your bed rock, drama-free? I mean, what if he/she is terrible and you have to face him/her every time you step out of your room? What if you want to go for round two, but the kid down the hall has already moved on to the girl in 4H…and you can hear it as you stumble home? What if, by some college miracle, you two end up dating….and then end up breaking up?

One of the most wonderful things about a hookup is the ability to wham, bam, thank you maam. You know – do it, have your fun, and then wash your hands (and lady parts) of the whole thing. It’s not so easy to do the no-strings-attached thing when that string is yanking on you every time you step foot outside your door.

Look, I get it. I hate the Walk of Shame just as much as the next girl, but really, I’d much rather have to squeeze my blistered feet into a pair of shoes and run home before anyone wakes up and points at me than deal with the repercussions of the cardinal sin of dormcest.

Bad idea. Bad, bad, bad.

Want to see what he said? Check out the male response at COEDmagazine.com.

[Get more He Said/She Said right here.]

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When I groaned after No Strings Attached ended, my friend turned to me and said, “If you hate romance, don’t go see romantic comedies!” And those who have read my reviews before probably already know that I’m not a sucker for romance. So you would think that I might enjoy a comedy about platonic sex buddies Emma and Adam (played by Nathalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher). They have their simple romance-free rules, just in case they start falling for each other. But as we all know, in the world of romantic comedies, rules are made to be broken. Corny jokes and unrealistic situations ensue.

Portman and Kutcher are beautiful people, no one can deny that. It’s not hard to watch them on screen. But after seeing Portman’s work in Black Swan, there’s just no comparison. She is capable of challenging herself as an actress, but No Strings Attached is the kind of movie that comes out a hundred times in a year. A girl with commitment issues “unexpectedly” reveals that her heart isn’t made of stone. Not completely original. I’m not yet convinced that Kutcher can take on tougher roles than the cute, flawless love interest, but he owes it to himself to at least try something new.

There are a lot of minor characters who the audience is forced to become invested in, but don’t get any reward. Abby Elliot, known for being a current cast member on SNL, could have used a lot more screen time. The same goes for Mindy Kaling (The Office), Olivia Thirlby (Juno), Kevin Kline, and Ludacris. And there’s a puppy, who’s a complete scene-stealer. Unfortunately rather than getting to know their characters, we’re forced to sit through almost two hours of Adam and Emma will-they-won’t-they.

Every movie has some redeeming qualities, though, and this one has two: its use of technology…and Ludacris. Unlike the majority of this unrealistic movie (Adam’s dad gets together with Adam’s ex-girlfriend just for an example off the top of my head), the use of technology was actually clever. When Adam and his friends analyze text messages and voicemails going back and forth between him and Emma, it was pretty reminiscent of some conversations between my friends. (Ever have one of those conversations: “OMG, he texted me ‘hi.’ What do I say back?” and then debate possible responses for an hour?) That’s the one great thing about romantic comedies; they’re usually not in production for an extended period of time, so they are pretty relevant.

Overall, if you’re unlike me and are looking to lose yourself in a simple romantic comedy with a couple of clever, check out No Strings Attached. It will definitely deliver. If you’re hoping for a movie with a little more meat that makes you feel something, go watch one of the Academy Award front-runners instead (try The King’s Speech if you haven’t seen it yet).

Click here to get Meredith’s take on other new releases.