That hot guy turned out to be Jonathan Rhys Meyers, and although I ended up falling asleep before the movie ended (something about self-absorbed people and Woody Allen dialogue works better than Lunesta for me), I couldn’t forget that Irish accent and those awesome lips.

Flash forward to one odd magazine cover and a few movies later, and you’ve got someone who’s not only no longer attracted to JRM, but has developed a strange fear of seeing his face anywhere.

I don’t know what happened. I’m not sure if he lost weight, got plastic surgery, or if my taste in men has just changed drastically, but seeing the recent pictures of JRM makes me want to stay away from his new movie August Rush (even though the adorable Keri Rusell co-stars) purely because his face makes me so damn uncomfortable.

Does he stand in front of the mirror and practice that pout? Did someone mention that looking like a possessed vampire who just got the lights turned on them was sexy? Is walking the line between sounding pretentious and insecure a publicity ploy? I don’t know the answer to any of these questions. I just know that not since Carrot Top have I been so nervous to look into the face of a celebrity.

What do you think? Am I just not seeing the attractiveness under the freaky stare? Does something about JRM scare you too? I mean, what’s this guy’s deal?

Well, apparently, there are people who want that slight but noticeable smell around them at all times.

Vulva Original (I’m not joking) is one of the newest sexual oddities to hit the market.

Its developers insist Vulva “is not a perfume”. Instead, they describe their product as “a beguiling vaginal scent which is purely a substance for your own smelling pleasure.”

Ew.

Developed in Germany, where a “research team” is working on complimenting the original scent with two new smells, “Exotic” and “Eighteen” (I mean, Jesus!).

Vulva Original doesn’t have much media surrounding it besides an explicit website with lots of vague references to sex.

Although, I guess if you’re selling something that supposedly smells like vajayjays, there really isn’t much to say besides “buy this if you like the smell of vagina”.

As for me, I’ll stick with my scented candles.