With Spring Break fast approaching (more on that here!), it’s time to start thinking about what you’ll be wearing with that margarita on the hot, sandy beaches. That also means it’s time to get your bikini bod ready and prep yourself for the agony of swimsuit shopping.

But while you might dread seeing your pasty skin or winter bulge under the fluorescent changing room lights, there are so many adorable swimsuits to distract you from the horrors you (think you) see staring back at you from the unforgiving mirror. (Seriously, is that a fun house mirror?!)

Swimwear is fun! It’s also one of the best times to experiment with trends. If you’re otherwise shy about stripes, polka dots or colorful, abstract patterns, swimsuits are the easiest way to embrace it all. It’s a chance to make a statement and stand out. To go a little wild. To highlight your best assets. Because the chances of being remembered on the crowded beaches of Cancun in a boring black bikini are slim to none.

So dust the snow off your shoulders and strip down all those layers. It’s time to think Spring (Break)! [Click on any swimsuit to shop it!]

It’s starting to get hot, hot, hot outside! While I’m stuck in landlocked Alberta, where no one has pools, I’m sure many of you out there are gearing up to start hitting the beach, or hang out poolside on a weekly (if not daily) basis.

Whether you choose to wear a bikini or a one-piece, you’re going to need a cover-up for going to the beach, or even just covering up a bit to avoid extreme sun exposure.  Lucky for you there are some really cute options this year that will easily transition from the beach to the boardwalk (assuming you dry yourself up enough to avoid those pesky wet marks around your boobs…). Seriously, toss a pair of wedges and a few bangles into your beach bag and you can take these things all over town.

So put on your sunscreen, grab your shades and don a cute cover-up as you get ready to hang out by the water!

Good (no, great!) news, ladies!

One-pieces are totally in this summer, which has us happy as a clam since the past few weeks of finals have left no time for the gym and a lot of time for late-night food deliveries. For the first time since middle school we can actually feel sexy and trendy rockin’ something at the pool that isn’t a bikini (and doesn’t give us uni-boob like a Speedo!).

There are so many gorgeous, sexy and flattering one-pieces out there right now and I spent hours scouring the Internet to find the best ones for you. (OK, so I did it for me, but I’m sharing the fruits of my labors with you people.) There’s a wide variety of style, coverage, and price so everyone can find somethin’ they love. Slip on one of these and all eyes will be on you at the beach this summer! Enjoy!

If you’re not lucky enough to be flaunting this number around the pool at an island resort, it will make you feel like you are with it’s gorgeous ruffles, flower print and gold accents! Plus, it looks like a bikini from the back if you’re still getting used to the one-piece thing. (Oh, and it just happens to be on major sale right now. What’s not to love?!)

This piece by Kimchi Blue is the bomb.com- the perfect mix of sweet and sexy. The coverage is balanced by the plunging neckline and cute cutout in the back- and it comes in three different colors!

A bright-colored one-piece that covers my belly while complementing my tan, for 20 bucks!? Oh Forever 21, how I love thee.

Oh my God, this one is JUST. SO. CUTE. The tie at the bust line accentuates and adds a whole lot of sexy, while the ruched midsection and ruffled hem are totally flattering for those who want the most coverage. Plus, once again, it’s on sale!

This one’s a splurge, but it’s GORGEOUS, and I have a mild obsession with all things Marc Jacobs. I’m absolutely in love with the hot pink color and ruffles. First summer paycheck, where are you!?!?

So cute, so flattering, and so cheap!  This one’s a basic staple that will look good on everyone.

The retro style of this suit makes it flattering. The metallic shine makes it faboulous. Wear this to the beach and you’ll be what the name says – a bathing beauty.

Last Thursday, I was craving a chicken caesar salad. I had half an hour before my lifeguarding shift started, and Sunset Groceries deli-fresh salad bar was calling my name.  I thought, “Hey, I’ll just run in, scoop up one of those pre-made containers with the Parmesan shavings already rationed out, and go to work.” At the time, it didn’t even register that I was rocking my navy blue one-piece, with GUARD embroidered across the chest. Waistband rolled Soffes? Why not, it’s not like I was going to see anyone worth impressing in the deli line. Thursday at 1:30 PM was prime time for soccer moms, not soccer players.

Weaving in and out of the deli displays, my salad search came up empty-handed. Lunchables, guacamole, pineapple chunks, but no grilled chicken-y goodness. I finished a few more unsuccessful laps before surrendering myself to the deli line. Maybe the salads were just so delicious that they hid them behind the counter, I reasoned, a treat for the persistent customers. Besides, I needed to get to work. There were lives to be guarded, flip flop tans to perfect.

“Number 96?”

I looked up. HOLY CRAP. I blinked. HOLY FREAKING HELLA CRAP. There, behind the deli counter, sporting a white apron and what appeared to be an ill-fitting hairnet, stood my Big Ex. The one I had not seen since our drawn-out, emotionally-draining, mentally-exhausting December break-up. 

“Hi. That’s me.”

At this point, all I wanted to do was put the world on pause and take my time to digest the situation. And maybe brush my hair. But I wasn’t Zack Morris so neither of those actions was an option; I didn’t have much choice but to power through. Besides, I had already come this far; I was not leaving without my salad… and a nice side of tips for surviving that first run in with the Big Ex.

1. Do Not Get Chatty
My first instinct in any awkward situation is to talk. Talk about anything. Just so it isn’t silent. Yet, while it took every ounce of strength in my body not to word vomit it up, it was worth it. Blurting “Hey, so this braid thing I started doing with my hair? It’s because my bangs are at this weird length and they don’t quite reach ponytails. But don’t worry, because Jennifer Aniston braids her hair too. Just so you know,” or ‘Wow this is weird, you’ve totally seen me naked. And now I’m not. I’m just standing here, you know, in the deli line, probably starring in some hidden camera made for TV guerilla style romantic comedy,” just doesn’t scream,  “Hey doucher, look what you’re missing!”

A simple “Hey, how are you? I didn’t expect to see you at Sunset Food’s deli line/Limited Too/the Medical Library/this Carrie Underwood concert” is enough.

2. Do Not Linger
When you’ve gone a long time without seeing someone who was once a constant fixture in your life, it’s almost instinctive to be curious. Finally, a chance to fill in everything you couldn’t uncover on Facebook! Do not stalk. If you think the temptation to accidentally run into him will be too strong, start purchasing your salads from Super Target (they give you more chicken, anyway). Be polite, be brief, and get out. Do not make excuses to spend an extended period of time with him, i.e. “Hey, so I think I might need pre-made salads for the entire water park staff. Want me to help you with the lettuce?” Not so much.

3. Exit on a Good Note
Bitterness is not pretty. It shows you still care enough about what he thinks to let it affect your happiness. Obviously, if you and your ex managed to split on good terms, then this won’t be an issue. But, since break-ups are rarely smooth and easy, I think it’s safe to assume that most people will have at least a little negativity. Resist the urge to say anything biting. Smile and wish him a good day, because you are confident and happy and better off. If by some chance your iPhone is programmed to play All American Rejects “Gives You Hell,” every time you get a text (my friend has hers set to this, and it makes me ten kinds of nervous) ignore it and glance around for the source, confused.

4. Call for Backup Once You Leave
As I half jogged, half sprinted from the check-out to my pick-up truck (don’t worry, I coolly and calmly left the deli with salad in hand, saving the inevitable WTF moment until I was safely out of sight) my first instinct was to call my best friend. Laura reassured me that I had come out on top, (swimsuit > hairnet) and convinced me not to stress. Text one of your girls just in case you need to vent, or simply wrap our head around what just happened.

5. Do Not Wallow. Sing.
No dwelling; he’s an ex for a reason. Instead, play a really good girl song in the car. I like Taylor Swift’s “A Place in This World,” and India Arie’s “I Choose.”  Leona Lewis’ “Better in Time,” is suitable, but if it’s gonna make you sad, skip it. If you wanna go with the classics, hit up “Wannabe” and “No Scrubs.” Sing along happily and enjoy the salads in life.

Swimsuit shopping has been dreaded by women for a very long time, but it doesn’t have to be.  Sure, seeing all that cellulite harshly highlighted by the flourecent lights of a dressing room is U-G-L-Y, but there are so many cute suits this season that you may not even notice those ripples.

This summer there is no one-size (or style) fits all for bathing suits.  There truly is a bathing suit for everyone regardless of shape, size, style or skin tone.  No longer are you bounded by the basic two options: the one-piece or the bikini.  Stores are carrying the monokini, the bikini, the tankini — and many variations on each of these different basic cuts. With all the options out there, you are sure to find one (or one for everyday!) that fits your budget and looks H-O-T.

Invest in Sunscreen- I know. I sound like your mom. That’s because I’m quoting my own mom. But seriously its been months since your skin has been exposed to the sun. The only thing more tragic than coming back with cornrows from the Caribbean is returning to school with a 3rd degree burn and 4 inch blister on your face (true story).

Begin Drinking Dangerous Amounts- (And this is part of the blog where I veer away from anything my mom has ever said.) In just a few days you will be drinking more alcohol than your liver could ever imagine and unless you want to die, it’s essential you start building up your tolerance ASAP. I know that a lot of people have midterms this week but that’s no excuse to be letting your guard down. There should be beers at every breakfast and shots with every snack. If there is any point during the day where you could legally drive, you are not preparing yourself responsibly for whats going to happen during break.

Start Sleeping- When you’re not drinking, you should be sleeping. Sleep so much that you will never want to sleep again. Because you won’t be sleeping. Not for an entire week. Chances are that if you’re not in the mood to get some, your roommate will be. There’s no hope for any 8-hour nights in any spring break destination.

Pack Immodium- Ew. Gross. I know. But some of the places where people will be traveling aren’t exactly known for their safe water and hygienic food practices. All it takes is one slurp of tap water from the bathroom for you to be keeled over for the rest of the break. Save yourself and your dignity by packing a just-in-case box.

Buy a One-Piece- If you haven’t already begun the rigorous (and traditional) spring-break-no-eat-find-out-where-the-school-gym-is diet yet, there is no longer any chance for you get that six-pack that you talked about during New Year’s Resolutions. But don’t freak out. Nothing covers up a long winter of eating like a one-piece. Tankini’s are so 90′s and two-pieces are too flashy. Opt for the always classy one-piece. Maybe even go strapless! If all else fails go for the Speedo lifeguard suit. It’s a great conversation piece and it’s make people feel surprisingly safe around you.

Google Celebrities+Spring Break- Find out exactly which D-list celebrities will be at your spring break location and start bragging. Don’t let anyone else feel like they picked the better destination because Spencer and Heidi will be hosting a wet-t-shirt contest. Let them know that DJ Juice will be kickin it old school next to your hotel. And if there’s no one at your destination, make it up. I thought I had made up DJ Juice until I just googled and found out that he would be making a spring break appearance.

What are your last-minute tips for a great spring break?

Well that’s bulls**t.

Bathing suits are supposed to be fun, flirty and cute. We wear them when we’re supposed to be having fun, not stressing because we’re not as surgically enhanced as the girl next to us or investing in last minute sarongs. With Spring Break steadfastly approaching, it’s time to check out the best bathing suits out there and re-vamp our ideas about swimsuit shopping.

So grab a trusted and honest friend, remove the necessary body hair and spray tan yourself silly (it seriously helps in dressing room fluorescents) and let’s shop.

Best Budget (And no one will know it!)

Old Navy’s Smocked Paisley Bikini

Remember those days when you wouldn’t be caught dead without your neon Old Navy Fleece jacket and every time you walked into Old Navy you had to buy 5 pairs of flip flops? Remember those really cheery Old navy commercials with everyone dancing? Well Old navy is awesome again (even though I was still shopping there when it wasn’t…those flip flops kick ass!) and all the proof you need is in their swimwear collection. This cobalt blue string bikini looks like you plucked it straight out of a Mediterranean boutique instead of your local Old Navy, and no one will be the wiser that you spent less than 50 bucks on the whole thing. You can shop by pattern, cut or mix and match, and every.single.piece. is under $20.

Best Bust Creators

Victoria’s Secret MiracleBra Swimsuits

Any of the tops offered by the MiracleBra line are bound to enhance whatever you’ve got up top. The suits all come in a ton of different cuts, colors and patterns, so the possibilities are endless when you’re creating your ideal bikini. (Bonus: seriously smaller chance that anyone on the beach will be wearing the same suit as you). Even if you want to be seriously sexy up top, you can keep it conservative on the bottom thanks to VS’s separates. This top is my favorite, mostly because it’s wireless, and if my PC doesn’t have wires, I personally believe my boobs shouldn’t either. Because it’s all cloth, the top is way more comfortable and definitely won’t get bent out of shape after some intense volleyball.

Bikini (F)or (large)Bust!

BECCA’s Expedition Halter

If you are well endowed when it comes to mammary issues, then you know how hard it is to find a decent fitting AND cute swimsuit. Enter BECCA by Rebecca Virtue. In almost every single pattern or style, the brand offers a D and/or DD cup size. Join in now: hallelujah! I love this geometric pattern because it is a) very cool and b) draws the eye in a diagonal direction, therefore (visually) cutting your boob in half (I said visually, ladies.) The cool coral, black and teal enameled brooch in the middle ties the funky pattern perfectly together, and the thick halter straps provide maximum support without underwire. Perfection.

Best One Piece

Venus’s South Beach Monokini

For the ultimate combo of chic and sexy, cut-out one pieces are the way to go. The cut-outs shave inches off of your waist by drawing your eye inward, and I love that the halter top isn’t so skimpy that the fabric will fall out of place if you move. In black, this suit begs you to wear it with heels, a floppy hat and huge sunglasses while you call everyone “dahling,” but all the other colors and patterns are so much fun that you might just want to buy two (and at $34 a pop, why the hell shouldn’t you?).

Best Itty-Bitty Bikini

Victoria’s Secret VerySexy Jeweled Orchid

All yellow polka dots aside, if you’ve been busting your butt at the gym since before SB09 was just a twinkle in your eye, show off your hard work in one of these. The maroon color is gorgeous on just about any skintone and the orchid accents are beautiful. They also allow you to look hot and fashionable on the beach without adding accessories that will probably end up broken, lost, or in the pocket of someone with a metal detector. The tiny triangle top gives you free reign over just how much cleavage you want to show and the low rise/high cut bottoms will leave very little to the imagination. If you’ve got the body to rock this bikini then work it!

Best splurge

Betsey Johnson’s Unforgettable Bikini with Swim Skirt

Not going anywhere for Spring Break? Then reward yourself for not blowing 6 months salary in one week (those margaritas add up!) and splurge on this. When I first saw this suit, my mind went into cuteness overload. Baby yellow? Yes, please. Floral detail on a classically feminine cut? OMG bikini heaven. This design also comes in a triangle or halter top , and tie or Brazilian bottoms (and yes, they all have the adorable rose detailing). Leave it to Betsey Johnson to create a perfect blend of retro glam, soft colors and hardcore sexiness…and turn it into a swimsuit.

Best Body Makeover

Miraclesuit’s Barcelona Bandeau

Ok, so I know the idea of a Miraclesuit sounds like something your Mom bought recently, but trust me when I say it truly is a MIRACLE. The extreme amount of spandex in this suit allows it to suck in, flatten, push up and shape pretty much any area on your body that makes you uncomfortable. The retro-bandeau style reminds me so much of pin-up girl suits, and they make the most of curves instead of trying to squeeze them into an ill-fitting suit.

Best All Around

BECCA by Rebecca Virtue.

Whenever I go to buy a new swimsuit, Becca’s collection is always the first one I check out. Her styles are always fabulous and fun, and there’s a cut for however–ahem—confident I’m feeling about strutting around in glorified underwear. And she never disappoints. A native Californian, Rebecca Virtue knows her beachwear. She believes in working with the natural shape of our bodies to create beautiful swimwear for everyone. All of her suits are designed with pretty detailing, gorgeous colors, cool combinations of fabrics (including soy!) and are meant to fit you flawlessly. And the best part? These suits last. I bought my first Becca suit when I was 15 and still wear it to this day without any saggy fabric or stretched out elastic—definitely worth it. You can check out her whole 2009 collection at her official website.

If you’re like me, no matter how much time you spend in the gym, there are some body parts you’d rather not flaunt. But with spring break coming up, there’s absolutely no reason for you to hit the beach or pools without feeling fabulous. Never to fear ladies; I’ve dug around for some hot ideas for you to look and feel your best, no matter what body type you have.

If you’re worried about:

Hips & Thighs

This is the one I worry about. My usual remedy for this is board shorts. They look cute and easy, and are a great accessory for a bikini. No one has to know you’re wearing em to cover up a few imperfections.

TIP: Get a fixed waistband board short, not an elastic band. Fixed waistbands are smoother and give you a more streamlined look, so your stomach ends up looking ab-fab. Stay away from gathered or anything elastic; it makes you look bulky, which sorta defeats the purpose, no?

Stomach

Personally, I feel there’s nothing wrong with a one-piece, especially if it’s done well. Here is where rouching is your friend. It distracts the eye, and it disguises that mini beer belly wonderfully. I love this first one because it’s very classically sexy.

TIP: If you want the coverage of a one piece, but the playfulness of a bikini, swimwear designers answered our prayers with the tankini.

Large Chest

Another one of my worries. The best thing for girls who need a bit more support without looking dowdy is the ever-amazing halter top, especially ones with broad straps. Not only do halters provide much-needed support, but the cut of a halter is very slimming. The key to looking good in anything is balance; halters make you look smaller up top so that you look proportional. Plus those suckers hold your chest in place, which is always important.

TIP: Stay away from anything with the words “string” or “bandeau.” It’s just an accident waiting to happen.

In a surprise move, the one-piece has become the rarer breed of swim apparel. The bikini gets all the attention. I mean, why shouldn’t it? It’s smaller, newer, and used to be a symbol of youthful rebellion. Not that I’m advocating some sort of return to traditional moral values (this is what my boyfriend thought when I told him I was writing about one-pieces). I just think the tank has a freshness about it. It invokes sultry women like Marilyn Monroe, Raquel Welch, and timeless hottie, Sophia Loren.

Plus, it’s completely unexpected. I don’t even remember the last time I wore a one-piece, but I’m fairly sure I was still in elementary school. Don’t you remember when your mom finally lifted the ban on bikinis? It was a big deal to trot down to your local mall and pick out the swimsuit that was sure to completely tranform your life and make that cute guy with the bowl cut and Airwalks fall in love with you.

But now we’re older, maybe a little wiser when we haven’t been drinking, and we know that sometimes it’s more exciting to show a little less skin. Make people use their imagination. If you still want to be overtly sexy, apparently a lot of guys have a big thing for a women in white swimwear…which isn’t surprising given the popularity of Cancun based wet t-shirt contests. If you’re into that sort of thing, check out the DKNY suit pictured below.

With the joys of the one-piece in mind, here are my top 7 favorite one-pieces (in no particular order).

Gingham BandeauTank, J.Crew $70               

                                         Black Swimsuit, Stella McCartney for Adidas $100

                                     Nylon Tricot Cut-Out Swimsuit, American Apparel $20

Damsel Solid One-Piece, Urban Outfitters $88

Ruched One-Piece, DKNY $96

Dot One Piece Bandeau, American Eagle $40

Monaco, Asha Couture $136