I don’t know about you gals, but there’s something about shopping that always puts me in a better mood when I’m down in the dumps.  This is especially true when I’m PMSing–buying myself new, pretty and sparkly things makes me feel so much better about myself (even if trying things on over my bloated ass does not).  Now there’s proof that there may actually be a biological reason for why shopping makes us so happy.

A new study says that women are more likely to go on a shopping spree about 10 days before their period, on which they actually tend to spend more than usual and are more inclined towards making impulse purchases. (Editor’s Note: that explains the Snuggie….) GREAT — as if we needed yet another way PMS ruins our lives.

The psychologists who conducted the survey had two theories as to why this is the case.  First, they believe that women shop right before getting their periods in order to counteract the negative emotions they feel during that time (like feeling stressed out or depressed). Um, duh!

The other theory is that since this is time in a woman’s cycle that she’s ovulating, women buy things to make themselves more attractive, such as makeup or high heels. Tru dat.

While it may be tempting to use the “But I had PMS!” excuse when explaining the credit card bills to mom and dad, resist the urge. The study also revealed that most purchases made during this time were followed by serious buyer’s remorse. Your best bet is to wait out the PMS in bed with a bucket of cookie dough instead of at the mall; an empty bank account (and a freaking Snuggie) is no way to beat those pre-menstrual blues.

And, what if I told you it involved no pills, shots, or weird, granola-hippie “herbal” treatments?

Well ladies, it’s certainly a possibilty…and while it sounds like a dream come true for those of us held prisoner by Tic-Tac-sized pills, I’m not entirely convinced that I can get down while free and clear of all worry. What is this magical device?

Meet the Lady Comp, the one thing on Earth you’ll have to trust more than God. That is, if you dont want mini-me’s running all over the place. It works by recording your temperature upon waking up in the morning, and from the readings, will detect whether or not you are ovulating. Green = go. Red = YOU’LL GET PREGNANT!! DON’T DO IT!!

It sounds incredible. No more bloating, loss of sex drive (which defeats the purpose of BC), acne, and the other millions of side effects birth control usually boasts. But isn’t this esentially the Rhythm Method?

I mean, there is science to back up the claims that you’re internal body temperature rises when you’re ovulating, but I can just hear the voice of the school nurse, my doctor…and yes, my mother telling me I’m crazy for even considering this all-natural, all-faith option.

But like most things that are natural and free of body-harming chemicals, it’s not available in the U.S.. Damn.

Looks like I’ll have to play it (really) safe until Lady Comp goes mainstream.