I used to hate being pale. I desperately envied the girls who came back from spring break with perfect, even tans. My skin burns incredibly easily, so unless I cake on bottles and bottles of sunscreen, I end up the color of a boiled lobster. I mean really, really red. Fire engine, ripe tomato red. Eventually, my sunburns fade into tans, but that takes weeks, and my “tan” is pretty pale by most people’s standards.

After years of lamenting my pasty state, I finally realized: I’m never going to be tan! My skin has always been and will always be pale. Baby, I was born this way.

Here are the reasons why I don’t tan:

Skin cancer. Yes, this one is obvious. Warnings about the dangers of the sun are everywhere. But I have personal experience on this front. My dad has struggled with skin cancer for the past ten years, and helping take care of him after his worst surgery was particularly good motivation for me to protect my skin. He had to have a ping-pong ball-sized piece of skin cut out of his temple and the spot still has to be carefully watched.

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They say a leopard can’t change its spots, but you, my friend, can change your makeup shade. Now that summer is coming and we will all be getting a little sun kissed, it’s imperative that we make a few makeup tweaks to reflect our new skin tone! I cringe when I see a girl walking around with a face that doesn’t match the color of her body, and whether her makeup is too light or too dark, that obvious makeup line on her jaw is not cute.

If you don’t have the money or time to buy a new shade of powder every time you tan, what should you do? Blend, blend, blend! In this video I’ll share some secrets to keep you looking fresh this season instead of like you belong on the Jersey Shore. Read More »

I was born with a skin-tone that falls somewhere between “fresh milk” and “blank paper.” I’ve heard every “where are the Seven Dwarves?” and “Ah! You’re blinding me!” joke in existence, replacing my joyful anticipation of summer with an ominous dread. As girls with non-glow-in-the-dark skin flounce down the street in their shorts and minis, my legs have been relegated to hot, dark jeans.

In years past, in order to reach the deep, savage “normal-people” color I have so longed for, I have resorted to the religious application of self-tanners, which, while making me darker, have also made me smellier. And we all know nothing is more appealing to a man than a girl who smells like chemicals and has weird, orange-streaked sheets. And to top it all off, after my daily self-tanning regimen, there would almost inevitably come the cruel mockery of the phrase “you’re so light!”

Sigh. Read More »

We’ve all seen the commercials, heard our mothers’ and doctors’ advice and read the warning articles. But SPF still remains a point of negligence for way too many of us. For a solid 16 years I tried to defy my Irish heritage and insisted on laying out and beaching it with my uber tan girlfriends, sans sunscreen. After several severe sunburns throughout my childhood and early teens (I’m talking blistering, purple skin, too painful to wear clothes or move sun damage), I was only slightly weary about the danger I was exposing myself to.

Finally, halfway through high school, I made peace with being pale and embraced the art of self tanning. Since then I have (tried to) become religious about slathering on sun protection every. single. day. It is a chore sometimes, but when I want to slack on the SPF, I just think of this gadget. Here’s how to work SPF into your lifestyle easily.

SPF Moisturizer: For every day exposure, protection while going to and from work or school, or spending minimal time outdoors. Daily use of a low SPF sunscreen (like 15) can reduce sun damage even more than occasional use of a super high SPF. Sub this for your regular morning face lotion. Aim for at least 30. Most people don’t use the right amount of sun protection (about a teaspoon for your face)–they usually use only half, so double the level of SPF you desire. If you think you’ll miss that sun kissed glow you achieve on your cheeks and nose, try Neutrogena Summer Glow Daily moisturizer. You’ll still get a healthy glow…emphasis on healthy. Read More »

Being Irish-Italian carries with it a few unfortunates. I’ve got a temper that can flair up out of nowhere and an unearthly hunger for all things bread. I’m also pale. Redheaded and pale. Pale.

Because of my unsightly whiteness, I find most self-tanners look completely ridiculous on me. I don’t just turn Lindsay Lohan orange, I turn Tropicana orange.

Until this summer, I had resigned myself to carrying the semi-albino torch forever, scoping on the SPF 45 and radiating whiteness like Kiki Dunst on a ski hill. But this May, I stumbled across a product that didn’t just make good on its promise: it came through with flying colors of tan.

Jergens Natural Glow Firming Daily Moisturizer may have a long name, but that’s because it does more than your average body moisturizer. Not only does this product “firm” that cellulite, it also gives an all over summer glow that actually looks real. And unlike those other self-tanners, it doesn’t smell like musty, wet dirt. Read More »