For the past few weeks, the cast of MTV’s Jersey Shore has been filming the 4th season of the show in Florence, Italy. Since the city of Florence had all these weird rules about the show filming (no filming inside nightclubs, no filming people drinking, etc…), it’s no surprise that MTV decided to bring the cast back to Seaside Heights to film an episode or two. While we’re used to seeing the infamous MVP (Mike, Vinny, and Pauly D), Pauly’s nowhere to be seen in these pics, so enjoy these ridiculous new shots of MV… R.

Am I the only person who can’t stand the Situation, or does he have some crazy fangirls I was unaware of? Do you like MVR or do you miss Pauly D? Have you ever been to Seaside Heights to check out some guidos? Let us know!

The time has come to put away the self tanner and slow down the fist pumping. Tonight is the season finale of Jersey Shore. Waaaaah (Snooki voice). Season 3 of everyone’s guilty pleasure has brought us a lot of drama, a lot of toilet issues (from Deena’s constipation to JWoww’s public urination to Ronnie’s bowel movements on steroids), and a LOT of smushing.

Which makes me wonder…

The gorillas of the shore house obviously get it in with a lot of grenades chicks, but are they any good? I mean, get past the abs (Pauly/Sitch), the arms (RonRon) and the giant cannoli (Vinny) – do these boys really know how to please a lady? I mean, Ronnie’s got to be good; why else would Sam keep coming back for more? And Vinny’s obviously got something going on to leave Snooks in tears. But what about Sitch? Or Pauly? With all that practice, they’ve got to know what they’re doing, right? Read More »

This week, the Golden Globes happened along with a lot of other fun stuff! Celebs got pissed, celebs got engaged, celebs broke up, and some celebs even had secret babies! All in all, a well-rounded week, I’d say.

Back To The Semester Parties

1. You’ll probably never see Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes again. Despite the fact that he did a hilarious job of hosting the Golden Globes, which would have been utterly dull without him, Ricky Gervais’s jokes are being slammed by the majority of Hollywood. Why? I guess because he made fun of both Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp within the first five minutes (I guess Hollywood royalty isn’t used to being picked on…), he trashed the members of the Hollywood Foreign Press, and according to some people, he just went ‘too far’ with the jokes he made about Robert Downey Jr., Bruce Willis, and Tom Cruise. There were tons of rumors that he was asked to never return – but apparently, Ricky has made that decision on his own. Can we pull the stick out of Hollywood’s Botox-injected butt, please?

2. Halle Berry is having baby daddy drama. She’s going into a custody battle with her ex, Gabriel Aubry, over their daughter Nahla. He wants to be officially declared the father, and wants joint custody of his daughter. Can’t really blame the guy, can you? Their break-up seemed pretty friendly, but let’s see what happens when the court gets involved.

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Sometimes I think we should just rename winter the season of love. When the cold weather comes in, it seems like couples just come out of the woodwork….or snowbanks. Suddenly they are holding hands in every store, making out on the sidewalks, and sharing kisses between sips of coffee at Starbucks.

Yes, it’s a little nauseating, but come on; everyone’s looking for a little love come holiday time.

But what makes a good love? A rugged jaw, some tight abs and some sparkling baby blues wouldn’t hurt, but when you get down to it, those are only an added bonus. The shiny gold bangle to your already perfect LBD. The truth is, there are way more important things every guy’s gotta have if he wants the honor of calling us his GF. And no, Pauly D, having a 25-minute daily hair regimen is not one of them.

So here are the 5 things we’re looking for when it comes to finding a boyf.

Makeout Skills:
Let’s be honest – no matter how much you love someone, no boyfriend can reach perfect status if there isn’t any chemistry, and chemistry simply can’t exist if the guy is sucking your nose off. Or licking your gums. Or drooling on your chin. A good boyfriend must have kissing mastered. And that means a variety, people. Sometimes we’re totally into a slow, romantic kiss, while other times we want to go at it like were in junior high and our parents could walk in any minute. Read More »

Besides Lindsay Lohan being Lindsay Lohan and a few other tidbits of news, celebrity gossip was pretty slow this week. Maybe all the stars are getting ready for the holidays, or maybe they needed a break after last week’s divorce-a-thon, but either way, I hope they do something more interesting next week. I need more scandal!

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Other than, “OH YEAH, EVERGLADES, YEAH” it was really difficult for me to take anything away from last night’s episode of Jersey Shore. Are we seriously dealing with a finale right now? I would’ve rather been watching South Park’s ripoff of the Jersey cast…. a la beast Snooki screaming “SNOOKI WANT SMOOSH SMOOSH!”

Seriously, the Everglades? How funny is it to confuse a crocodile with an alligator? Although I will admit the added dinosaur noises (and I don’t mean the ones coming from Sammi) to the whole Everglades event with the alligator attacking the airboat were amusing. And I don’t doubt that the bugs are bigger than Snooki….

And then the crew headed back for South Beach, after the frog-legs incident, and things took a turn for the boring. Read More »

We had many, many thoughts going into this episode. Many questions about how the Snooki/Angelina throwdown would go down. Questions on if Tee-Shirt time would make another appearance (it did). Questions if Pauly would, yet again, be a human alarm clock with a crazy Kool-Aid man “OH YEAHHHH!” voice (he was). As the episode started up, we only had one burning question in mind, 25 minutes in:

WHERE IS SNOOKI?

MTV, you threw a lot at us this episode. A lot. So much that I was actually compelled to watch the After Show, wondering how to steal the host’s job. Let’s break this episode down by the major events.

PART I: The Situation Gets Punched by a Girl (again) and Bangs a Canadian, eh?
Angelina socks The Situation in the face and JWoww has a heart-to-heart with her since they can now bond over the common ground about punching Sitch in the face. WTF, Jenni? We miss your ‘roid rage. Situation reiterates that he’s the glue/leader of the shore crew and reminds us all that Angelina sucks. He moves his frustration to the club Karma/Kantra/Krib or whatever it was, and brings along some Canadian girl who’s a real handful in the sack and on the dance floor, fighting women off her man’s abs. Vinny makes some Canadian joke aboot the girl and Nutella and the crew all listens to them scream and moan in the smush room. (Seriously, that ish was loud.) Read More »

Let me just open with a bold statement: Ron and Sammi need to get off my television, ASAP. Their negativity is clogging up the screen and prohibiting Snooki from getting her fist pump on. Seriously, get these two epic losers off of MTV before I JWoww their whiny behinds.

Also, another note about “JWowwing,” can we just point out that the only reason we were watching last night’s episode was to see JWoww take a b*tch down and it didn’t happen until the last 30 seconds of the show? Then we were left hanging with absolutely no previews to get excited about for next week? Low blow, J.Shore. This week’s episode left a lot unanswered, gentle viewers. Let’s recap all the questions that ran through our minds last night. Read More »

"To family....and marinara from the jar!"

Who can’t help but love the dysfunction of the Jersey Shore? This week, the gang (I feel like we’re opening a summary of Scooby Doo. Come on – Snookie, Scooby… same thing?) deals with some hard-hitting moral dilemmas. Angelina, JWoww and Snookers are all plagued by the memories of Ron getting wild at the club and their desire to inform dear Sammi Sweetheart of her “bf’s” wrongdoings. The boys deal with weeding through grenades and landmines at the gelato shop.

Come on, ladies. You and Ronnie are ON CAMERA. Did we forget this blindingly obvious fact? Eventually Miss Sammi is going to see her precious Ron-Ron hooking up with Miami scram and she will also see you trying to cover up the fact that you know anything. Putting the fact that MTV has cameras in everyone’s faces on the backburner, let’s run down the I.F.F. (I’m F*cked Foundation) governmental structure.

I.F.F. – “I’m F*cked Foundation” Hierarchy Read More »

Is anyone else seeing a darker side of the Jersey Shore this season? No? Just me? Maybe I should take off my sunglasses when I’m inside.

Ahhhh, much better.

So far this season on J.S. there has been one underlying theme making its way through Miami: smush or get smushed. When you’re smushin’, you’re crushing it, you’re lookin good, you’re rocking GTL and just ruling South Beach.

And when you’re getting smushed?

You’re not a good look for Miami, for your family, or for humanity at large. Let’s evaluate who was smushing in Episode 3 and who was getting majorly smushed… Read More »