[Welcome to Celebrity Chic on the Cheap, where our style guru takes a celebrity look and breaks it down for you, our poor college fashionista. What does that mean? It means that while the celebrities (like always fabulous Selena Gomez) are spending $5,000 on an ensemble you don’t have to. All you have to do is click on the goods and - boom - you can buy the entire look. For cheap. Yes, we know - there is a spot for her in heaven.]

Halle Berry is a critically acclaimed, history-making, Academy Award winning actress. A former Bond Girl. A mother. And, obviously, a regulation hottie. She made super-short hair desirable. She’s always on “most beautiful/sexiest” lists. She inspires cheeseball novelty songs. She inspires spontaneous make out seshes at prestigious award ceremonies. At 44 years old, she is as fierce as stars 20 years younger as her.

Alas, while I don’t know how you can achieve killer bone structure or permanently incandescent skin, I can show you how to get one of Halle’s classic, sophisticated, sexy looks without maxing out five credit cards.

Product Information: Jacket – Dillards, $49; Top – Forever 21, $19.80; Jeans – Dillards, $24; Shoes – Unlisted, $26.95; Bag – Target, $39.99; Necklace – Wet Seal, $10.

One of my absolute favorite things about fall, besides the pumpkin spice lattes and the boys in scarves, is the plethora of (faux) leather. The boots. The skirts. The bags. And of course, the jackets. What I love about this particular jacket are the ruffles, which add a glorious burst of femininity. Though this is one of the pricier items I’ve posted in this column, it is a total investment piece. Leather jackets (and ruffles) will never fall out of favor. Ever.

Halle decided to pair her leather jacket with a delicate lace top, which is one of this season’s trends. Lace and leather, when they’re both neutral colored and not too revealing, can easily be sultry and appropriate for daytime. Jeans dress this everything down, while the strappy platforms are simple but still very stylish. The oversized hobo bag adds another casual touch, and the pearl and chain necklace is perfect because it encapsulates the girly-yet-edgy motif of the outfit. Halle Berry’s style is proof that sexy is timeless…now if only I could steal her ability to constantly bag sexy model-actors as easily as I can steal her style…

Get more celebrity looks for less here.

[Welcome to Celebrity Chic on the Cheap, where our style guru takes a celebrity look and breaks it down for you, our poor college fashionista. What does that mean? It means that while the celebrities are spending $5,000 on an ensemble (even for just a simple Saturday stroll), you don’t have to. All you have to do is click on the goods and - boom - you can buy the entire look. For cheap. Yes, we know - there is a spot for her in heaven.]

Quite honestly, I don’t really know who Ashley Greene is. I know she’s in Twilight, but seeing as how there are much hotter vampires out there, I’ve never seen the movies. I know she once sent naked photos to someone….and got caught. Aaaand, that’s about it.

However, this girl keeps popping up on red carpets, award shows and some of my favorite gossip sites, and she’s really pretty in that “I-just-became-semi-relevant-so-I-still-have-to-pay-for-my-clothes-and-I-still-shop-at-the-mall-but-at-least-I’ve-upgraded-to-Nordstrom” way. You know?

My point? Who she is doesn’t really matter to me as much as what she’s been wearing. And what she’s been wearing is totally slammin’. Ashley’s style is sometimes chic, sometimes fun, sometimes laid back and edgy, yet so easy to re-imagine and re-create on a college girl’s budget.

I don’t know you, Ashley, but I think I love you.

Shirt, Jeans, Shoes, Bracelets.

Ashley’s outfit is cute; I love bubble sleeves/exaggerated shoulders paired with a slimmer bottom. The detailing on the shirt stands out on its own so the outfit doesn’t need much else (especially when one of Hollywood’s hottest new stars is sporting it). But, for those of us who like a little extra bling to our looks, I went ahead and iced this outfit out.

When you’ve got sleeve/neck/shoulder detailing on a shirt, you definitely don’t want to add any more anything to your neckline. So with a shirt like this one from Forever 21, a chunky stack of bracelets or bangles is definitely the way to go. It’s just the perfect amount of sparkle to take a somewhat standard outfit to the next level. (And if you’re up for it, you could go for a rocker chic leather cuff instead to add a little edge to this sweet ensemble.)

See? Wasn’t that easy?

So starting this week, I’m going to be taking a look at the advice that falls into the “moronic” end of that spectrum. If I can convince even one girl to reconsider whatever’s being professed in her glossy of choice, I’ll sleep a little better at night.

Let’s begin by talking about sex, baby. Everyone who’s seen a drugstore magazine rack knows that the cover of any women’s magazine isn’t complete without some headline like “BETTER BONING: 113 Sex Tips to Rock His World.”

I don’t know what you guys think, but I’m pretty sure those articles always end up containing variations on the same 15 generic sex tips (“Be confident and tell him what you want.” “Send him naughty texts during the day.” Lather, rinse, repeat). But sometimes, instead of being boring and predictable, the pointers end up being flat-out crazypants.

While browsing through Cosmo’s “9 Erotic Tips to Rock Your World—and His,” for example, I came across this tip from one Cricket Richmond, who apparently wrote a book called Secrets of Sizzling Sex in 1994 (although it’s nowhere to be found on Amazon):

“Freeze some grapes in a Ziploc bag. Once they’re ice-cold, put them in your mouth. Then begin oral sex. The temperature and sensation produced by the grapes while you’re giving him oral sex is incredible.”

Um… seriously? This reminds me of the time Cosmo told us that guys are really into girls putting donuts around their disco sticks and then eating them off. Can you imagine how awkward it would be to pause your hook-up to run to your freezer and grab a baggie of cold fruit—let alone how weird your partner-in-crime would think you were for trying to give him head while you had chipmunk cheeks? And doesn’t it seem inevitable that one or more of the grapes would fall out while you were trying to rock his world, creating a slobbery mess/the potential for wine stains on your sheets? I can think of no way that attempting a grape-job wouldn’t end in serious embarrassment for all parties involved.

Later in the article, Cricket also advises girls to use “a new, soft, manual toothbrush” as a sex toy and tells us to try wearing a long strand of pearls in the bedroom, running it along a man’s body and finally wrapping it “around his penis and sort of roll[ing] the individual pearls around and press[ing] them on his skin.” What’s with the props, Cricket? When did good, old-fashioned foreplay become boring? And even more, I’m not so sure my grandmother had penis-wrapping in mind when she shelled out for that string o’ pearls.

While I know that criticizing Cricket’s advice without trying it myself is a little bit of a cop-out, I’m pretty sure that most guys think doing stuff like this while you’re getting busy needlessly complicates what should be a pretty straightforward encounter. Shaking up your routine is all well and good, but there must be a better way to do it than putting a Crest Spinbrush where the sun don’t shine. Here’s some advice that might be a little more useful: most people who try to spice up their sex life by using everyday objects as toys are probably going to end up looking like idiots in the sack.

Thanks a lot, women’s magazines!

[I want it, I need it, I can’t live without it. There are so many things on store shelves and racks right now that we want to take home and hang in our closets. Things that are so cute, everyone should know about them. We’ll share ‘em with you here (because we’re that nice), but as far as actually getting them goes….well, you’re on your own with that one.]

I love things that sparkle, so it’s obvious that I am head over heels in love with these rings from Myra Elizabeth. Made-to-order with bands of sterling silver and authentic Swarovski crystals and pearls, these beauties will surely outshine anything within a mile radius. They instantly add glamour to any outfit and, with so many clusters of different colors and combinations, there’s at least 3 that make me weak in the knees.

I would seriously rock one on every finger!

Each ring comes with a friendship poem and is already gift-wrapped, making them really cute presents for birthdays, Christmas, or, you know, me.

Myra Elizabeth also makes necklaces, earrings, and bracelets. All are made of high quality materials and are crafted into gorgeous pieces. Just like the rings, there is a great variety to choose from. I always knew I needed a little more bling in my life, and Myra delivers.

Come to mama, Ms. Myra.

I adore vintage stuff. Nothing makes me squeal quite like walking into a vintage boutique and running my hands along the delicate lace dresses and feather trimmed hats. The fact that all vintage shops have such adorably cleaver names just endear them to me more (Hello, Again Boutique? Another Man’s Treasure? *squeal!).

Sigh. Too bad they’re all too damn expensive to shop from. Ever since vintage became fashionable, the prices have skyrocketed. Eighty bucks for a blouse? That’s like, eighty times what it sold for in the seventies! When it comes down to it, I’m not willing to pay that much for a brand new shirt, let alone an old, used one. And don’t get me started on Goodwill – trust me, you don’t want to set foot into the one by me. Not only do they lack anything remotely cute, but the place is pretty gross, smells funny and houses some sketchy people. Ever get hit on by creepy homeless men while digging through a barrel of old nighties? No? Well you can take my word for it – it’s not fun.

Anyway, back to my point. In an act of sheer desperation born from an utter lack of cash, I went rifling through the only other place I knew that could possibly cater to my vintage needs: my 78 year old grandmother’s closet. Oh yeah, I went there… and to my surprise, I actually snagged some great finds!

It turns out you can find a lot of great stuff that, while it may not look so hot on your aged grandmother, will look pretty darn fashionable on you. It’s all about how you rock it – add a belt to an oversized dress to make it fit better, hem the skirt if it’s too long. Hell, while you’re at it, turn it into a mini and make your grandma really squirm.

If sharing outfits with your granny is too much for you, dig through her old jewelry box (with permission of course; you wouldn’t want to lose the diamond heirloom passed down for generations at some club). With luck, you might score some awesome costume jewelry: chunky necklaces, cocktail rings, and pearl-encrusted brooches maybe? Have fun with it. I did. And the best part of it all? I didn’t spend a dime.

So go for it, dear readers, and make sure you leave a comment to tell me about your awesome finds! Just do me a favor and stay away from the granny panties (literally)!

The holidays are upon us, and you know what that means — it’s time to give and to get! Okay, they’re about more than that, but who doesn’t want the latest and greatest clothing and accessories? That’s what we thought. Read on to discover this week’s edition of The Best Holiday Gifts, featuring fabulous jewelry!

One Pearl Pink Potato Pearl Strand

Forget your grandma’s pearls — this necklace is so the way of the future. Tiny mismatched pink pearls are accented by a single oversized grey pearl in a strand so long, you can wrap it three times for added glamour!

$75 at onepearl.com

Rachel Leigh Gumball Ring in Plum

This handmade ring is sure to garner tons of attention when it sits atop your index finger — yes, your index finger, not your ring one! But be careful not to chew on this gumball, we wouldn’t want you to chip your teeth!

$68 at rachelleigh.com

Natha Perkins Copper Nests Earrings

We haven’t seen a pair of earrings this inventive in quite some time. Intricately wound bands of copper wire surround faceted crystal studs, forming a sort of target silhouette that just looks gorgeous dangling from the ear.

$80 at nathaperkins.com

mark Make Change Convertible Earrings

Want to feel like a fashion designer? Then these are totally the right pair of earrings for you. The hoop contains an oversized teardrop-shaped silhouette and a faceted jewel hanging from a long chain, each of which can be worn together or separately. You can make them a style all your own!

$12 at meetmark.com

Prismera Design Yucca Hoop Necklace

The yucca is probably one of the most intriguing in the floral family, with its ability to lift its face to the moon at night and emit a heady fragrance. So it only stands to reason that this delicate necklace is unbelievably beautiful.

$64 at prismeradesign.com

Bellissima Jewelry Design Seaside Earrings

Aqua chalcedony drops dangle in between myriad ring-linked gold chains, creating a silhouette that’s somehow both sweet and sophisticated all at once.

$62 at bellissimajewelrydesign.com

Betty Belts Chelsea Necklace

This necklace is totally vintage-y, with an intricately cut red heart hanging from a cool leather cord. We totally wish we could go back to the 60s with it — but we’ll settle for right here, right now.

$24 at bettybelts.com

[Do you ever feel like you can’t pull something off? Have trendy pieces in your closet that you would never have the courage to actually wear out? Well take those pieces out, shake off the dust, and continue reading! In this series, I will choose a different piece that can be difficult to incorporate into an outfit and give you ideas on how to wear it. If there’s anything you would like to read about in the future, please leave a comment!]

Headbands of all kinds are really in right now, thanks to Leighton Meester’s character Blair Waldorf on “Gossip Girl.” Headbands are simple accessories which can make you look instantly 10x cuter. Plus, they can hide those greasy roots you have from living in the library this week sans showers.

Headbands with bows are really girly and youthful. While they can look a little childish, worn with the right things they can make your outfit look polished. Blair Waldorf (above), for example, pairs her headband with a sophisticated blazer and collared shirt. This is definitely not something a little girl would wear. Usually something simple, like a sweater or solid color dress, would also work well.

When rocking the headband, make sure not to go too matchy-matchy, or too over the top. Yes, Blair can pull it all off, but she is not real. You are.

Here are some great bow headband options. Click to learn more:

Headbands with a little glam are a great way to add something extra to your look. And there are so many ways to do it: you can pair them with something simple, like a black dress, or add even more glitz to an already awesome ensemble. You can wear one with your hair down, or throw it on over a messy-chic bun.

There are bedazzled headbands all over the place with everything from rhinestones to pearls to sparkles and so much more. These are some of my favorites:

For more cute headbands, check out Head Games Online – they have a ton of them, plus other super cute hair accessories.

[In early adulthood there is an activity that plays a large role in most of our lives; nights out on the town. And with those nights out always comes the question: “What am I gonna wear?!?”

Each week I’ll be putting together a cute and affordable “going out” ensemble guide (that you can tweak to your own personal style and body type, of course) so that maybe that age-old question can be answered a little quicker than usual. And your friends aren’t waiting - for hours - for you to emerge from your room. Just consider me your own (free) personal Rachel Zoe.]

It’s the holiday/party season and with the economy in bad shape, it is the perfect time to honor another time of financial woe and give your party outfit some of that old style, 1920′s glamour. I read an article a few months ago when the financial meltdown had just begun that was reflecting on how times of national financial hardship tend to lead to more excessive glamour and glitz for the sake of lifting spirits, so why not take advantage of the currently bleak economy by having fun, going a bit overboard, and puttin’ on the ritz?

A flirty black dress is always popular, and something with ruffles or fringe will get that true 20′s feel…

Stockings were all the rage in those times, but give it a more modern twist with a funky pair of fishnets or sheer textured tights.

A cute pair of peep-toe pumps are the perfect compliment to this look. To add a little fun, get some pumps in a color other than black, like this purple pair.

Of course, no outfit is complete without jewelry, and (faux) pearls are the best option for this look. (Just be sure not to put too many pieces of jewelry on, you don’t wanna look too costume-y)

Or go for ultimate glam and put a vintage/vintage-inspired broach on your dress…

And if you really wanna go for that vintage feel, top it all off with a fun feathery hair piece, or an awesome hat…

The perk of resort wear is that it’s classy and respectable until it reaches Frat Row. You can be adorable without dressing like a desperate-to-impress freshman, all it takes is a little dedication to the cause.

Collecting argyle sweaters and linen trousers can help you transition into a non-party persona for the workplace with no trouble. Here are some tips for dressing to the yuppie role without coming off as a complete douchebag:

1) Collars down. At all times. Ladies, if you’re going for the cleavage factor and rocking a Lacoste to the bar, pair it with pumps, ass-flattering denim, and go crazy. Unbutton as low as you dare, but find a cute contrasting cami to toss under that pique polo.

2) Set a limit to the number of pastels you go with. Your boyfriend can wear as much pink as he likes, and so can you, but just remember that the phrase “too much of a good thing” came about for a reason.

3) Pearls are lovely… in moderation. A pearl necklace is a great staple, and you can wear your own for composite pictures! Joking. Ish. Also, solitaire cultured pearl earrings are simple and classy. Wearing the set altogether may just be a touch overboard; pick one and go with it.

4) Be careful with prints. Madras needs a solid piece to balance it out. No tartan and argyle in the same ensemble. Mixing patterns is fine so long as one is bold and one is subtle.

5) Layering is key. Button-downs with cardigans or pullover sweaters are always great, and look adorable with a little denim skirt or pair of twill shorts when it’s a little warmer. Blazers and jackets are great to pair with a cute cami or silk going-out shirt, keeping you sophisticated enough to go to a nice wine or martini bar, and casual enough to go to a house party. It also gives you the option to adapt to whatever temperature you happen to encounter. And on that note…

5) Dress for the weather. Resort wear is geared toward a warm environment, but remember that you’re not likely to go yachting in mid-winter during the workweek. Seersucker generally is only allowed between Memorial and Labor Days. I don’t ordinarily follow the “white” rule, but this one I concur with. It just looks awkward unless you’re living in a fantastic climate.

Suggestions for perfecting the look? Try J. Crew, Vineyard Vines, Vera Bradley for some extremely Connecticut accessories, Polo by Ralph Lauren, and Lacoste.

Want to look yuppie on a budget? You sound just like me. Hit up outlet malls, overstock.com, or bigger department stores like Macy’s to pick up those sale items. Polo shirts don’t need a pony or gator, and argyle isn’t affiliated with a particular label or brandname. Happy shopping!

It was B.

It took quite some time to calm Maggie down enough to even understand her screams. All I understood was, “How could he do that to me!?” I feared the worst and made mental plans for how I would kill her boyfriend for whatever horrible thing he did to make her this upset.

And then I heard what she was saying:

“HE FARTED! He farted in front of me!”

Maggie went on to explain that upon letting the gassy offender go, Steve looked at the horror written all over her face and said, “What? I thought we were at that point.”

Then she broke down into tears.

And I have to say, I can’t blame her. First of all, Maggie is a WASP to the core. WASPs wear pearls and pink Polo’s. WASPs do not enjoy listening to their mates fart. But even more, what is this “point” that Steve speaks of? Why does he suddenly think it is OK to let loose and cut el queso in front of his lady?

It could be that he looks at her like a sister/guy friend and feels comfortable. Or it could be that he really cares about her and realizes that she is going to be around for awhile so there is no point in making excuses and running out of the room every time his lunch comes back to haunt him. It might also be that he had too many eggs for breakfast, had a little gassy accident and didn’t know what else to say.

Being “that girl” – you know, the one the guys always find it ok to fart in front of – I decided to ask some of my boys about their farting standards. And I found quite a varied response.

Some guys say they will fart in front of anyone; that it is natural, and they don’t care who is around when they have an impending gas explosion.

Me: But what if it is a girl you are trying to get with?

Anonymous Boy: I might think about it but I’ll still do it. You can’t control it.

Others, however, will only do it in front of people they feel completely comfortable with: girlfriends, their “boys”, or those few “lucky” gals (like me) they hang out with. Farting, then, is an honor given only to those worthy of being in the company of such a toxic emission. Apparently, then, I should feel honored to be given the opportunity to hear/smell/experience my friends’ farts.

And there are still others who do everything in their power to hold in the gas, no matter what the consequences are: stomach aches, cheek clenching, constant running to another room.

All boys, however, agreed that they didn’t want to hear their girls fart no matter what. In fact, many tried to fight the idea that women even know how to fart in the first place. Don’t worry; I showed them that we did.