On Saturday, Christina Aguilera performed a tribute at Etta James’s funeral in Los Angeles. She sang “At Last,” Etta’s most famous song. But even though she sounded great, the crowd was distracted by something. Christina had some kind of weird, brownish fluid dripping down her legs.

Lots of theories are going around about what that strange stuff might have been. One of the latest rumors is that Christina had an “accident” on stage. No, people don’t think she peed her pants. They think she had her period and forgot to put in a tampon. Come on, people. This isn’t middle school. Christina’s a big girl, and we’re sure she has her lady problems under control. Besides, that’s not what it would have looked like if she had gotten her period on stage. Her are a few of our suggestions about what might have really gone wrong.

initiating the gallery...

Female athletes, especially those involved in collegiate and professional-level sports, have long struggled to be taken seriously and treated as equals to their male counterparts. Many positive advances have been made, but with several universities still finding ways around Title IX – the law that banned sex discrimination in all federally funded education programs – it’s clear that the fight isn’t over.

The “mystery” of menstruation has been an integral part of the argument against women in sports. Many coaches, and even athletes, still believe that women are unable to perform to the best of their abilities at certain points in their cycle due to hormone fluctuations. However, there is disagreement about exactly what time of the month a woman will experience her athletic low, and past scientific studies on the issue have been contradictory and inconclusive. Female athletes are also often told to either begin using birth control pills or stop using them in order to alter their hormone levels.

But now, a European study focusing on female rowers has provided evidence that a woman’s hormone levels do not affect her athletic performance. Some subjects of the study were using the birth control pill, and others were not. Some of the rowers were competitive athletes, and others were recreational athletes. Every participant came into the lab several times throughout the month and performed a fitness test on a computerized rowing machine. Each visit, whether women’s estrogen levels were at their peak or at their lowest point, their measures of strength and endurance never varied.

Another study recently performed at the University of Denmark found that women aren’t the weaker sex – quite the opposite, in fact. The study showed that during physical training, women’s tendons and ligaments did not become as thick and strong as men’s did. However, after women stopped or cut back on their workouts, they did not lose strength as quickly as men did. Why? Scientists think it’s a protection against weakness during periods of inactivity, like pregnancy. Not too shabby, huh?

So what does this mean for you?

Well, it may leave you with one less excuse to skip the gym, but you have to admit this is pretty awesome! This is just more proof that nothing should stop you from getting out, getting fit and having fun. Oh, and giving all those boys a run for their money.

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[Everyone’s got a morning after story (some of which are way more mortifying than others) and we wanna hear yours! Send it over to us and we’ll post it – anonymously, of course – right here!]

I fell in love with Danny my freshman year of college when he dressed up as a sexy pterodactyl on Halloween. We lived on the same floor freshman year and I always went out of my way to run into him in the hallway. Like I would walk around outside his room claiming that I dropped my contact on the carpet somewhere in that exact area. Despite my complete awkwardness, we became really good friends and we spent the next two years heavily flirting with each other. But one of us was always involved with someone or getting over someone or hitting shamelessly on freshman girls (him!) and it never happened.

Until last Friday.

We were sitting on his couch eating college nachos (you know what I’m talking about…when you come home drunk and melt cheese on any and all crackers, pretzels, chips, cookies) and I got a sudden surge of confidence. I don’t know whether it was his cheesy breath or the fact that I drank tequila for the first time since freshman year, but I leaned in for the kiss. He leaned int too and before anyone could say “kisses con queso” (because who would say that?) we were in the throes of a passionate makeout sesh on the couch. At one point we came up for air and admitted to each other that we had both liked each other forever. Obvi this love confession swept me off my feet and I led him into the bedroom. It was fireworks, rom-com movies, and all that jazz.

Then I woke up. Doomsday.

My always irregular period arrived at the worst possible moment…on his white sheets. I began hyperventilating – like seriously hyperventilating – and trying to think of how to get out of his bed and clean it up without waking him up. But clearly my panic attack/heavy breathing/sobbing in the corner woke him. He rolled over and found the stain where I was supposed to be.

The look on his face was one I’ll never forgot. Pure disgust. I tried to laugh it off (“I guess I’m not pregnant?”), he tried to laugh it off. But it was pretty obvious he was more than a little grossed out. I volunteered to wash the sheets or buy him new ones (“OMG, I’ll get you a new mattress!”), but he didn’t look interested in either option. After a few minutes of awkward silence, I got dressed, and headed out.

I don’t remember any Drew Barrymore movies ending like this.

I don’t know about you, but I’m still coming down from last night’s major TV fest. The Biggest Loser finale (nice belt, Michael), Gaga Glee (loved Kurt’s McQueen shoes), The Hills (even though Spencer didn’t make an appearance), American Idol (OK, I didn’t watch that but I’m sure it was an emotional one)…. it was all too much to handle.

Thank god we’ve got a long weekend coming so I can catch up on sleep/the 16 episodes of Intervention that have been taking up space on my DVR. Well, that and eat, like, 12 hot dogs. Mmmmm.

Before we can get to the holiday weekend, though, we’ve got to get through another “Would You Rather.” And since summer is thisclose, let’s ponder everyone’s biggest summer fear.

Would you rather have Aunt Flo come for a surprise visit while you’re donning your hottest, tightest, cutest brand new white jeans at the family BBQ OR have her show up when your long distance boyfriend comes to visit for the first weekend in months?

Things to consider: Seventeen magazine-style embarrassing moment, a major stain on your brand new jeans, much-needed nookie.

Chew on this one (OK, considering the topic, that’s a pretty gross phrase to use….), vote and tell us why below!

We thought we’d help and every Thursday our friend Dr. Lissa Rankin will be answering your questions. The ones you couldn’t ask your doctor in person. Just leave your questions in the comments, or send em over to us. (We’ll keep it all anonymous for you.) Dr. Lissa will answer anything – really, anything – about sex and other lady things. Don’t be shy; she’s waiting for ya!

Q: This is a really gross question, but I have to ask someone.

I discharge…a lot. And it’s not just around the time of my period. It’s random and plentiful. Ew. Anyways, I don’t know what to do about it or if it’s caused by something serious? Help. I’m afraid to be with a boy because he’ll be super grossed out.

A: This isn’t gross, sweetie. It’s your body, and discharge is a normal part of being a woman. But I wish I had more information. Is your discharge white, clear, or greenish? Does it have an odor- like fish or fresh bread- or is it odorless? Do you have any vaginal itching or burning? Is it there all the time, or just in the second half of your cycle? Have you been checked for sexually transmitted diseases (STD’s) like gonorrhea and chlamydia?

Without knowing those answers, it’s hard for me to comment on your specific situation. If you haven’t seen a doctor about this issue, it’s time. Go in, let your gyno take a gander, and make sure you’re not missing something. Sometimes, an increase in vaginal discharge is the only sign we have that something’s going on down there.

But I’m going to assume that you’ve seen a doctor and that you don’t have a vaginal infection, STD, or abnormal pap smear.  If we’ve ruled those out, we’re left with the fact that every woman makes some vaginal discharge, and every woman is different. The amount of discharge your body makes depends on your own glands, your hormones, your anatomy, medications you might be taking such as birth control pills, and where you are in your cycle.

It’s common for your body to make more discharge at certain times of the cycle, as the menstrual cycle is under hormonal control, and those hormones can affect production of secretions. It’s also normal to make more discharge when you’re turned on – thus the wetness you feel when you’re sexually excited.  If you’re taking birth control pills, you may notice more discharge from the estrogen in the pill. Also, if your cervix happens to have the glands on the outside of the cervix instead of the inside (a normal variant we call ectropion), you may make more discharge.

If your doctor has told you you’re normal, there’s no need to worry. Trust me, guys will be so honored to be down there that they won’t be turned off by your discharge. In fact, some guys find a wet vagina to be even more stimulating. Some women have very dry vaginas and would die to have your problem.  It’s all part of accepting our bodies just as they are and  loving ourselves, secretions and all.

"Oh, I'm kicking that guy's ass? Poor guy..."

There are some things you should always apologize for, like being late to meet a friend, bumping into someone on the street, or accidentally running over your ex-boyfriend’s foot with your car (whoops).

But there are also some things that, as a woman, you shouldn’t have to say sorry for.  I don’t care what anyone says, but you should not be left feeling guilty for any of the following.

Beating a Guy at Sports: Sunk the winning shot in a battle of the sexes?  Poker faced your way to a win?  We’ve all been told not to beat men at sports so we don’t bruise their precious egos, but this is also not 1950, so don’t hold back and don’t apologize.

Bypassing Lines at Clubs: Don’t let the haters have you giving looks of remorse as the velvet ropes are lifted.  Flaunt it if you’ve got it!

Intelligence: Today’s “role models” may cultivate dumb blonde stereotypes, but a woman who hides her intelligence is not attractive.  Be proud of your smarts and don’t shy away from speaking your mind!

PMS: I’m not saying storm around like a juiced-up Godzilla, but don’t apologize for being a little testy when it’s the time of the month.  It’s not our fault Eve ate that apple, so curl up in the fetal position and bitch away.

Your Twilight Obsession: Don’t be ashamed that you obsess over a man that sparkles.  Who cares if you’re over the age of 16 and in love with Edward?

I had just gotten out of a long relationship and immediately hopped into the sack with a new guy (…what? I needed some emotional support!) when I decided to change my birth control prescription. I had never really been happy with the old one, but had put off changing because I didn’t want to deal with the whole spotting issue with my BF around. So now, I reasoned, since the new guy and I were taking things slower, it would be a good time to make the switch.

Well, of course, taking it slow only lasts until somebody gets horny (or drunk), so a few days after I made the pill switch I found myself rolling around naked with my new beau. Everything was going fine – great, in fact – when he whispers in my ear excitedly “wow, you’re really wet!”

For just a second I was proud of myself for my impressive lubricative prowess (yes, it takes very little to make me proud) when suddenly he just stopped. He looked up at me worriedly and asked if I was OK. Confused, I looked down to see what he meant and almost had a panic attack. The spotting I had been worried about had started… all over his groin.

If there was a way to curl myself into a progressively smaller ball until I finally just disappeared, I would have done it. But surely I would have left a trail of blood (and tears) behind. I apologized profusely while I cleaned up the mess (on me, and my sheets, and my blanket, ugh!) and to his credit, he didn’t run screaming from the room.

Nonetheless, we decided to keep it down to cuddling until I was finished with my little transition and I had to promise to tell him the next time I decided to switch medication.

We thought we’d help and every Thursday our friend Dr. Lissa Rankin will be answering your questions. The ones you couldn’t ask your doctor in person and didn’t really trust the Yahoo community to answer for you. Just leave your questions in the comments, or send em over to us. (We’ll keep it all anonymous for you.) Dr. Lissa will answer anything – really, anything – about sex and other lady things. Don’t be shy; she’s waiting for ya!

Q: My period is irregular every month. Sometimes it comes 6 weeks apart and other times it can be up to 9.  I am not on birth control (can’t handle the side effects) and practice safe sex with my boyfriend. The problem is that I get freaked out every month that I’m pregnant. How soon can I take the test? Are there any signs I can look for that will either tell me I’m absolutely not pregnant or that maybe I am?

A: Sounds like your periods are annoying, unpredictable and scary. Bummer about that.  Chances are, if your periods are that irregular, that you’re not ovulating regularly, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have to worry about pregnancy. Your ovaries can still spit out an egg from time to time. When you’re not ovulating regularly, your uterus doesn’t know when to bleed, and your hormones can be all over the place.  Why might you be skipping periods or not ovulating?

Common Reasons for Irregular, Infrequent Periods:

- You exercise vigorously (think marathon runners and competitive gymnasts)
- You have an eating disorder.
- You’re overweight.
- You’re young and your body just hasn’t matured yet.
- You’re under a lot of stress.
- Your thyroid hormones are out of whack.
- You have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS).

What can you do about irregular, infrequent periods?

See your gynecologist. A thorough physical exam and laboratory evaluation are in order. If you can’t take birth control pills, progesterone therapy may help balance out your hormones, assuming there isn’t some other underlying cause.

In the mean time, what can you do about the pregnancy scares? That’s tricky. There’s no reliable sign to signal to you whether you’re definitely pregnant. Some people experience nausea, breast-tenderness, and fatigue in early pregnancy, but many women do not. Technically, a pregnancy test should be positive within two weeks of ovulation, but since you have no clue when or if you’re ovulating, that makes it tough to time taking pregnancy tests. You can try taking a pregnancy test four weeks after the first day of your last period, when you would expect your period to come if it was regular. If that’s negative, repeat it every two weeks after that until your next period comes.

But that’s just a band-aid. You’re better off getting to the root of the problem and seeing a doctor.  Good luck, honey. I hope you get it sorted out.