College Candy

I am a chronic list-maker, whether I have to make a difficult decision or not.  Lists help me organize my thoughts and remember important facts and details that I need for later.  However, there are some things that I would rather forget and that’s what this week’s showdown concerns.

Those of us who have little sisters know how annoying they can be (haha, love you Chloe!).  Those of us who are humans who participate in society know how annoying famous little sisters can be.  The most annoying of these are probably Ashlee Simpson (okay, the older sister is just as annoying…if not more so) and Jamie Lynn Spears (well…ditto).  But which one is more of a fame whore?  Which one can even be called a valid human being (j/k…sort of)? Read More »

If I ever got a tat, it would be this.

Pete Wentz uses spit to protect his family.

Check out the new iPhone.

Win some free mascara!

Is Lauren Conrad getting another show?

The 20 least feminist friendly TV characters.

OMG. So wrong. So, so wrong.

Dear (See Below) Bands,

I love your music. Love, love, love. But can you maybe try to be a little less annoying? It makes it so hard to defend you when I tell my friends about my favorite artists. Actually, it makes it hard to admit to anyone that you happen to be one of them.  And I want to make them like you, really, I do. But like that friend who has a minor character flaw that now pisses you off enough that you really can’t see the good in her anymore,  I’m finding it difficult to enjoy your music knowing how annoying you are.

Here are some heart-to-heart tips from your loving (secret) admirer to be a little less annoying and a little more rock and roll.

Fall Out Boy

You always have a spot in my 6-CD player in my car. Sugar, you’ll never go down on the playlist for me if you continue to make some of the sweetest pop punk music out there. But please, Pete Wentz, I’m begging you – cut your hair, lay off the eyeliner and put on a damn shirt when you are on a magazine cover. You need to settle down – you play bass. And, um, you have a kid?

Also, Patrick, can you please enunciate your song lyrics so I can actually sing along and not just randomly open my mouth while humming the tune to look like I know what I’m singing? And what’s up with the weird syntax and bizzare punctuation in the song titles? Thnks Fr Th Confusn. I mean, e.e. Cummings was a legit poet, while you’re just… an antithesis of all semblance of reason. And grammar. My English teacher highly disapproves. Read More »

Another blow for Lindsay Lohan.

Oh no. Dina Lohan’s on Twitter.

Tornadoes tear through Mississippi.

Do you want Fergie’s undies?

Legalizing marijuana is good for California.

Jamie Lynn Spears says no to marriage.

Problems for Pete and Ashlee?

Where are condoms made?

Goodbye, Blender!

Don’t be afraid of fear.

Watch out Brangelina - Madonna getting another kid?

Andy Samberg to host MTV Movie Awards? How do I go!?

You may want to reconsider those Big Macs.

Lohan’s arrest warrent recalled.

Gossip Girl, we miss you!!

Oh lord, I did NOT need to see that, Brooke Hogan!

Pete Wentz drinks his pee pee.

Filing your taxes isn’t so hard.

The most cliche lines for a breakup.

That Lady Gaga is talented.

Things are getting worse for Jessica Simpson.

Do Angie’s lips make her hotter?

Forget the Uggs. These boots have a purpose.

Salary caps for everyone!

Want free condoms for a year?

Bruce Springsteen hates Ticketmaster charges, too!

Tell us: has CollegeCandy ever looked so tasty?

First Pete Wentz, now 50 Cent is dabbling in man makeup.

10 ways to say I Love You…without saying it.

Jude Law as a Transvestite Supermodel? Yes, it’s true.

90’s styles that should have stayed in the 90’s.

Some very pretty lingerie options for Valentine’s Day.

5 uses for those magazine scent strips.

Innovative ways to make some extra moolah.

Get some free Diet Dr. Pepper!

Need to vent? This site was created for that sole purpose.

My boyfriend Will Arnett is hosting a Super Bowl Party!

Guy gets it on with travel toothbrush?

Are you a coffee shop-aholic?

Evan Rachel Wood clears up the Mickey Rourke rumors.

I’m pretty sure I could win Wing Bowl 2009. 

Are chandelier earrings coming back?

Is that Dakota Fanning!?

Check out Alexander McQueen for Target!

Are colleges going to eliminate grades?

Kelly and Donna are reunited!

Now it’s Pete’s turn to discuss Jessica Simpson’s weight.

So, the other infamous teen mother of 2008 – AKA not Jamie Lynn Spears – finally gave birth to a little Alaskan: Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston. What a mouthfull (that’s what she said). You know what that means! No, the baby did not get his first pair of hunting boots (that we know 0f).

It means that it’s time to sell those baby pics to the highest bidder!

Looks like People magazine won the bidding war, offering the Palin-Johnston clan $300,000. That’s a lot of money, especially in Alaska where the only things you can buy are drugs, tanning beds and weapons. Maybe they’ll use the money to buy a helicoptor for some wolf hunting. Or maybe they’ll use it to bail Mama Johnston out of jail?

All I know is Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson must be feeling pretty crappy right about now. They got a big fat ZERO for pics of Bronx Mowgli.

Condoleezza Rice wants us to thank President Bush.

Tracy Morgan and Oprah having a baby?

This is the most disturbing facial hair I’ve ever seen.

Pete Wentz has a white Christmas.

Christmas then and now.

Umbrellas aren’t just for rainy days anymore.

Hot new accessories available NOW at Target!

Simon Cowell and Marie Osmond?

The City premieres tonight! Wahoooo!

Cutest family ever.

[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal, and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupididty of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself of the stress that idiots, wrong meal orders, lack of cell phone ettiquette and cheese flavored products (that don’t even contain any freaking cheese!) induce.

So, in an attempt to avoid an ulcer or an unfortuante road rage incident, I vent to you, dear reader. Please feel free to join in and comment about anything–really, anything–that pissed. you. off. this week. Let it all hang out. I feel you.]

Unenthusiastic recipients: We’ve all been there: you spend hours– quite possibly even days–searching for the perfect gift for a special someone. You lovingly wrap it in unique and pretty paper before signing your name on the gift tag, anticipating that perfect moment when their face lights up with joy and gratitude, as they are thoroughly impressed by your gift buying skills. So imagine my frustration after saving my hard earned (and hard-not-to-spend-at-happy-hour) wages to buy my baby bro an iPod, only to watch him open it Christmas morning and proclaim “Cool. Thanks.” Ok now, I understand the whole males not expressing as much emotion concept; I understand that he’s a 16-year-old and slightly pissed off is his default setting, but come on, man! I think I deserved at least a Thank You hug. Read More »