“I don’t know if we should talk about this…”

“And why not? Everybody has sex!”

“Yeah, but everybody should be making love.”

“Come on, how many guys do you know making love?”

–Salt N Pepa, “Let’s Talk About Sex”

In the past six months, I’ve had sex. I’ve been laid. I f*cked. However, it’s been a long time since I’ve made love, and I kind of miss it. Some people might argue that there’s no difference – physically, they are the same. But emotionally, passionately, and mentally, the two deeds are very different.

1. The First Time.

The first time you make love with your partner, it’s usually a very special moment. It’s often planned out in advance, especially in new relationships. There’s often sensual foreplay, and your bodies fit together perfectly.

If it’s your first time with a new partner and you’re just having sex, it may be spontaneous. Your partner may not be your boyfriend, or even your crush, and the decision to go all the way is frequently a hormonal (thanks, booze!) impulse. First time sex can be sloppy and awkward as you try to find the right position, and after everything’s said and done, it feels like there was something missing. Read More »

Overall, this is sad, but in a couple of weeks I’ll be getting nearly a G in tax returns.  Yeah, that’s a crapload of money.  But when I look back at all the hours I worked in 2008, it also makes me realize… I made jack sh*t.  Still, this hefty lump sum couldn’t come at a better time for me, as I’m watching my credit card debt grow, next month’s rent is looming on the horizon, and summer (aka a full-time waitressing gig) can’t come quick enough.

In reality, I’d love to take my refund check and spend it in one go at the mall, especially since warm weather means I have to chuck my so-worn-they-belong-in-the-What-Not-to-Wear-dumpster sweater boots, and I don’t have ANY cute flip flops to wear in their place.  But, since I’ve been struggling all winter, I am going to use this money wisely.  And by use “wisely,” I don’t necessarily mean put it back into the bank.  We all deserve to splurge every now and then, and here are some of the best guilty pleasures your tax refund can buy.

1.  Upgrade your phone.

Am I the only campus coed who has never known the joys of an iPhone or Blackberry?  I recently lost my cell in a drunken stupor, and, though I had been waiting for the summer to upgrade, I figured it’s now or never.  Best buy of my life.  I got a refurbished 16-gig iPhone for under $250.  And it’s not just a phone– I can check the weather without getting out of bed or waiting for Weather.com to load on my slow-ass computer, I can check my email for last minute class cancellations while on my way to a lecture, and once I figure out these apps, I’m pretty sure I can load a calorie counter onto my phone to use in the dining hall.  How did I live without this baby? Read More »

Ladies, I’m sure you’ll agree with me: one of the most important aspects in any serious relationship is the sex. There’s no denying the physical and emotional needs for it, so what happens when you’re not getting any?  I had never anticipated being in a sexless relationship, so it came as a shock when my guy had a confession: he valued love and intimacy over the physical act of sex.

Right.

Naturally, it was a blow to my self-esteem. Was it me? Was I not sexy enough? Did the thought of me naked make his manhood shrivel with disgust? Read More »