Every week, I write a list. Okay, let’s cut the crap, we all get it by now. Every Monday morning at 9 AM you can count on a Weekly Ten from Melanie – Northeastern University popping onto your Google Reader or whatever you use to read the beloved CollegeCandy.

Anyway, these lists (lately) have been pretty mild and have settled down since my hipster-hating era. Let’s chalk that one up to me getting laid more frequently these days. Hurray! (Although, hipsters, I still am NOT impressed.)

This is not one of those lists. This week I have been pretty ticked off about, I don’t know, everything? I’d like to blame my new birth control but who knows? It could just be the weather or the fact that I fell on my face in front of about thirty people the other night when I attempted to drunkenly pounce someone and now my knee really, really hurts and I’m cranky about it and the only way I can make myself feel better is to dress up celebrities on Stardoll.com (Yes, I am aware that I’m 21 and, no, I do not care).

It does not matter. Here are the top ten things that annoy me, without fail.

10. Empty boxes left in the pantry or snack drawer at work
What the eff? When I want a granola bar and I see a box in the cupboard, I expect there to be a granola bar INSIDE the box. How hard is it to throw away an empty box after eating the last delicious S’Mores Luna bar? Seriously.

9. Ironing
Okay, can anyone else relate to this? I just feel like I’m pushing wrinkles to different spots. Extra annoying if I’m not even ironing my own clothes because for some reason I’m the designated laundry bitch in my relationship. I feel like Paris Hilton trying to be domestic – no skills. Read More »

[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal, and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupidity of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself of the stress that idiots, wrong meal orders, lack of cell phone etiquette and cheese flavored products (that don’t even contain any freaking cheese!) induce.

So, in an attempt to avoid an ulcer or an unfortunate road rage incident, I vent to you, dear reader. Please feel free to join in and comment about anything–really, anything–that pissed. you. off. this week. Let it all hang out. I feel you.]

Cell phone companies: Lately, all these upbeat and happy-go-lucky cell phone company commercials (in addition to the fact that my phone has, miraculously, not been stolen for a few years) led me to lower my guard towards the vicious corporate cell conglomerates. Until yesterday.

I practically skipped out of the store getting sticky fingerprints alllll ovah my new Vu. I had barely blinked when I signed away on the $264 transaction and sold my cell-soul for another two years (I like to pretend I’m really rich when I buy expensive things that are necessary purchases…it makes parting with my very small funds a lil bit easier). Then my boyfriend called; he had dutifully been doing some comparison shopping, as he’s well aware of my tendency to impulse buy. He had found the same phone, same deal for $135… before the rebate. Naturally, I went to return my phone and buy take the cheaper deal, only to find that, no, the company could not reverse the contract they JUST processed. And, no, I could not return my phone because apparently they examine it for microscopic scratches and cite a $75 “re-stocking” fee. So it was either keep my phone, or pay to return it. After my contract expires, I’m switching to carrier pigeon. Read More »

[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal, and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupididty of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself of the stress that idiots, wrong meal orders, lack of cell phone ettiquette and cheese flavored products (that don’t even contain any freaking cheese!) induce. So, in an attempt to avoid an ulcer or an unfortuante road rage incident, I vent to you, dear reader. Please feel free to join in and comment about anything–really, anything–that pissed. you. off. this week. Let it all hang out. I feel you.]

Saying “Hi” to Facebook friends. A slight differentiation from last week’s “awkward run-in.” It’s inevitable that you’re gonna see some of your Facebook buds out and about (I mean, why would you have accepted some weirdo’s friend request without some slight or vague form of acquaintance?) But therein lies the problem—the acquaintance can vary anywhere from “girl who was in your freshman stats class that you never talked to but still felt the need to add you” to “friend of a friend’s friend’s boyfriend who bought you a bottle of cabernet and therefore led to the obligatory friend acceptance.” What is the proper form of greeting for such a relationship? Will a high five suffice? A “bro” nod? A hug, hell, what about an air kiss?! I doubt Emily Post gave any specific etiquette on this 21^st century relationship, and I’m stuck awkwardly saying “Hey girl!” on the way out of the bathroom, severely questioning whether or not I actually know the person I just acknowledged…. Read More »

Out in Hollywood, there is a talented cross-dressing writer named Tyler Perry. Unfortunately, he is still pissed off. He has written and produced countless plays, musicals, films and TV shows – all targeting the African-American community. Tyler has created over $500M in revenues from his productions, and we can only assume he has banked a lot from that.

He bought a $5M mansion just outside of Atlanta. Yet, he is still pissed off. Tyler’s current movie “Why Did I Get Married?” ranked 2nd in Box Office revenues taking in $12.1M – yep, still pissed off. Why you ask? Because Perry’s series on TBS, “House of Payne,” is tanking.

I think 30 people are watching it, and that includes the cast, crew and family. So TBS did what any network would do – they said “Mr. Perry, your show sucks. Get it together of beat it!” Sadly, that was the wrong thing to say to the wrong person.

As if scripted from a bad network drama, the upcoming publicity battle is going to be epic.

Read More »