As usual, last night’s Video Music Awards blew.  The geniuses at MTV have succeded in turning what was once a borderline semi-entertaining awards show into a series of tedious advertisements between more advertisements.  Great Job!

But despite all the foolishness, the red carpet was chock full o’ eye-catching looks… some hot, some way not.  So, rather than making you search thru all those grocery-store-checkout-line-webzines for your VMA fashion fix, we have compiled the best of the best and the best of the worst for your viewing pleasure.

BTW Pink- You saying “Lemme Check My Flow” in a song has a way different connotation than when Eminem says it… and the thought makes me throw up in my mouth a little bit.

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I am the last girl on this planet who WANTS to like Ashlee Simpson. Yet, despite the low points she has hit in her career thus far, she has always seemed like the Simpson sibling with a brain and creativity.

I’m guessing that juxtaposing Jessica against any Lower East Side bar hopping twenty-something would lead me to the same conclusion…nonetheless, Ashlee has kept rolling with her career despite past mistakes. With a new nose, new hair, and a punk rock boo, she seems to always be reinventing herself.

Her first single off of her new album…did not suck. I really found myself liking “Outta My Head” and I thought the video was awesome. But as with most songs/videos that I like; the public didn’t take well to it.

Her newest single, “Little Miss Obsessive” is much more accessible…but luckily, it’s still not sucky. It’s certainly no example of genius musical composition. BUT it’s catchy and the lyrics are pretty familiar to me….as I think they would be for any girl:

“I guess we’re really over, so come over, I’m not over it / Late night, you make me feel like I’m desperate / I’m not desperate / A little bit possessive, little miss obsessive / can’t get over it.”

Who CAN’T relate?

So yes, kiddies, the verdict is in:

She doesn’t suck as much as her sister. And she also doesn’t suck as much as she used to. She’s got Tom from the Plain White T‘s on this track…and the male vocals definitely help to counter one’s instinct to write this song off as a girly pop song. But the only question that really matters here is: How long before a duet with Pete?!

In case you don’t know, winning a Grammy is sort of similar to winning the superlative for “like the most coolest, most awesome, most fabulous person EVER!!!” in your 12th grade yearbook.

The Grammy Award is one of, if not the most prestigious award to win in music. Unlike the American Music Awards or MTV’s Video Music Awards, feathered boas and pasties aren’t exactly appropriate attire. Artists don their Lorraine Schwartz jewels and their vintage haute-couture gowns and put their classiest act forward.

So naturally, when I read that Amy Winehouse is up for six Grammy noms (including both record and album of the year), one must wonder how a girl who is too drugged out to function will manage to:

a) Dress appropriately

b) Give a speech in the event that she wins

c) Actually show up (and not be totally obliterated)

The Grammy’s just got so much more exciting don’t you think??

Kanye is leading the pack with 8 nominations, and others up for awards include Justin Timberlake (What Goes Around Comes Around), Beyonce (Irreplaceable), Rhianna (Umbrella-ella… that song is STILL in my head) and Plain White T’s (Hey There Delilah… and that song STILL annoys me).

For a full list of Grammy nominees click here Tune in to CBS on February 10th 2008 to see the show. Since this year marks the Grammy’s 50th, expect to see some amazing tributes and performances… and perhaps a highly entertaining speech from Ms. Rehab herself.

Check out the newest video from The Plain White T’s, “Our Time Now”!

Yup, the list is out. MTV’s annual VMA noms have been released, and the list looks a little…repetitive, if I do say so myself.

And um, lame. Did I mention lame?

Of course you’ve got your Kanye and Justin, Rihanna pops up a lot, and at least there’s a little justice in this world- Amy Winehouse is on the list, but did someone fail to notice that the Plain White T’s, Hey There Delilah came out last year? This year’s “sudden hit” was a re-release. Cheap.

Not to say the song isn’t great, I just faintly recall gorging on cookie dough and nodding my head to those sappy lyrics amidst boy troubles… when I was still in high school. Where have you been, MTV? You’re a little late.

I’d leave it at that, but make this a whiney critical blog? Officially? Do I dare?

Beyonce (still blushing from her embarassingly clumsy wipeout) and Shakira’s “Beautiful Liar” actually claimed a nom spot for Best Choreography. Excuse me while I gag uncontrollably. If anything, this so-called ‘choreography’ looked more like two uncontrollable seizures. Belly-dancing while on E, if you will.

We get it. You have curves. And big loud voices. You’re a suh-viva and your hips don’t lie…or whatever. Just please stop doing that.

And to answer my previous question. I dare. (Obvi.)

Rock music and love go hand in hand.Have you ever wondered just what Jessie’s Girl looked like, or who what made Caroline so Sweet? And who the hell was Billie Jean? Coulda been a (younger) guy for all we know…….hmmm, come to think of it……we are talking about M.J. here. GROSS!

Whatever the case may be, music is full of songs titles dedicated to song writers’ personal female muses. We are, after all, such artistic inspirations!

Spinner.com has compiled a list of some of these women who left a permanent mark on music, starting with Delilah DiCrescenzo, who inspired Plain White T’s oh-so-cute recent hit, “Hey There Delilah.”

According to the site, “Plain White T’s frontman Tom Higginson wrote this ode to Columbia University steeplechase runner Delilah DiCrescenzo. He fell for Delilah and told her he’d written a tune about her, then quickly backed off when she asked to hear the song, which didn’t exist yet. By the time he got around to penning the ditty, Delilah was long gone. She has since weighed in, saying, “Part of me wants to scream at the top of my lungs that it’s about me. Another part of me wants to cower and say it’s not.”

Whatever man, I’d tell everyone I know if that song was written about me! It’s soo-oooo romantic!

Other highlights from the list include Sharona Alperin, who inspired the song, “My Sharona” (a one-hit-wonder, but a classic, nonetheless) and Rosanna Arquette, as in, “Rosanna” by Toto – only the best ’80′s pop song, like, ever.

It’s really cool to actually see who all these girls were, what they look like and the back story behind the songs. I mean, what girl doesn’t want a rocker writing a song about them? Again, it’s soo-oooo romantic!

Okay. Maybe this girl didn’t think it was so romantic.

From the album Every Second Counts. Download it here.