College Candy

We are definitely fans of Do-It-Yourself projects (we have a new one every Tuesday!). Whether it’s making your own yummy buttercream, or creating a new hairstyle, DIY activities are the best. But one thing’s for sure: you won’t be seeing us try any DIY cosmetic surgeries around here. We never even thought that was an option until we heard about a 54-year-old woman who thought she’d do her own silicone injections. Needless to say, that $10 vial of liquid silicone she bought online left less than stellar results.

And she thought those wrinkles were bad….

I’m pretty confident I don’t need to warn CC readers of the dangers of DIY cosmetic surgery (I’d like to think you are smarter than the average desperate 54-year-old), but just to be safe, let’s break down a few things that should never be DIY. Read More »

Whenever we need to make a difficult decision, we make a list.

“Gym or TV?”
“Jeans or dress?”
“Save money or buy a new iPhone?”

So when we are constantly faced with the awful decision of which fame whore couple is more fame whorey, we make a list. No, this isn’t Sophie’s choice, but it’s our choice and it’s hard.

Moving on.

This week’s showdown is between two “celebrity” couples that spend their days on the cover of every tabloid on earth. Which couple should have kept the cameras out of their lives? Do we really have to choose?! Read More »

Mmmm sperm!

So apparently all those frat guys during my last four years of university had it right all along – sperm really does have many health benefits.  A Norwegian company called Bioforskning (which sounds like the owner may have had a mouthful of something when she was asked to name the company) has developed a facial treatment to minimize wrinkles and smooth skin utilizing spermine, an element in human sperm.

Human. Sperm. WTF??

First of all, let’s just sit back and appreciate the thought process that had to have gone into this product.  Who came up with it?  Who was sitting around and thinking, “Oh you know what, I bet jizz is really good for your skin, let me test this out and then sell it for hundreds of dollars”??  I tell you what, when sperm is that close to my face, my skin care routine is usually the last thing on my mind.  The first thing?  “Argh, point that thing somewhere else!”

Secondly, this “treatment” can cost up to $250 per session.  Seriously? What happened to the days when jizz on your face was an unhappy accident after a night of too many free (and probably warm) beers in the basement of a fraternity house on the side of campus you usually avoid? And instead of thinking, “Oh hey, I should probably let this sink into my skin and give it a second to see if it does anything beneficial,” weren’t we all (those of us who were “blessed” enough to be in the beta stages of this beauty regimen) thinking, “Where’s my face wash??”

Although Botox and  plastic surgery get a lot of flack, I feel a bit more warm to the idea of someone injecting pig fat or whatever it is into my face now that I know a sperm facial (didn’t that use to be a euphemism for something?) is the alternative treatment.  At any rate, I hope this development doesn’t leak to those frat guys (or really, any sexually active male), otherwise this fall’s crop of freshman girls have a whole new thing coming to them (all puns intended).

We love our mothers unconditionally. No matter how angry we get at them or how embarrassed our mothers make us, we continue to be on their side. They can yell at us, criticize us or even spend over $15,000 on plastic surgery in attempt to look like our identical twin and we will still love ‘em anyway. Wait, that last one has never happened to you?

Okay, maybe your mother hasn’t gone to the extreme like Jane Cunliffe’s mom, Janet, who believes that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Sure, your mother hasn’t spent thousands of dollars to change her nose, lips, breasts, hair and clothes, only to be mistaken as your younger sister. That was a bad example, but I’m sure she’s done something embarrassing that you’ve forgiven her for.

Nothing comes to mind? Well, I have ten “I-could-kill-you-I’m-so-embarrassed” moments below. Let me refresh your memory for you. If I forgot anything, please leave it in the comments, I like to know I’m not alone.

Moms are embarrassing when they…

1. Drive you to school in their pajamas.

2. Dress like you.  Juicy sweatsuits and belly shirts aren’t PTA appropriate!

3. Pull a Dina Lohan and gets all stage-mom on you.

4. Flirt with your friend’s fathers. Or your friends…

5. Lecture or yell at your friends.

6. Still lick their thumbs to wipe something off your face. For the last time, its a freckle and I’m 22 years old!

7. Try to set you up with anything with a penis.

8. Make awkward sexual jokes.

9. Wear Mom jeans. Enough said.

10. Use words like “underpants” in public.

Ever have one of those weeks, where it just feels like nothing is going right? No money, no job, no plans for the weekend. I can tell you first hand, it sucks. We all get down once in a while and let’s be honest here – this economy isn’t helping anyone’s mood. Sometimes we just want something, anything to make us feel better. Unfortunately, chocolate’s not cutting it, and either is sitting home watching that America’s Next Top Model marathon on the couch. So what’s a broke college kid to do?

How ’bout some new boobs?

Yeah, you heard me right – a new rack could be your solution to the no-money blues. The Sun is reporting that breast augmentation is the latest trend among the jobless. Because spending $10,000 is a great idea when you don’t have an income. The idea is that any advantage on a job interview is a good one, especially when it involves first appearances.

That’s where I get a little lost though; why would a bigger chest signify a more qualified employee?  I understand ironing your shirt or shining your shoes, but implants? Really? Major invasive cosmetic surgery is really the route you want to go to give yourself that little something extra on an interview? Color me confused, because unless you are being interviewed to become the next Playboy centerfold, I really don’t think double Ds are going to help. Read More »

When Oprah high fived Kate Winslet and proclaimed “God bless your real breasts!” I smiled and felt a little bit prouder for women with real breasts everywhere. Not everyone has huge, perky, volleyballs on their chests and it’s about time someone recognized it. Maybe it’s silly that it took a reminder from Oprah Winfrey that breasts move, but after the article in the New York Times yesterday, it looks like more women need to be reminded.

The latest figures show that “the number of cosmetic surgical procedures performed on youths 18 or younger more than tripled over a 10-year period, to 205,119 in 2007 from 59,890 in 1997.” That is an astronomical number!

I know I shouldn’t be surprised being I can name more than a few people who have been offered a pair of silicone implants wrapped in a red bow come graduation day, but that number really shocks me.

I understand that beauty and perfection have been something that women have constantly strived for and I also understand that cosmetic surgery has become more acceptible in our society. I mean, just turn on the television and I bet you can find at least three makeover shows on right this minute, and at least one re-run of Dr. 90210. Still, maybe we should be wondering why young girls are inceasingly begging and pleading for new noses, breasts, chins, teeth, ears, tummies and every other resize-able, reshape-able body part. Read More »

This Bailey’s commercial is wrong on so many levels.

Jennifer Aniston: is she cold or are those fakes?

Nip/Tuck is real! America’s first face transplant was a success!

The worst trends of 2008.

Internet addiction: it’s a real thing!

Finally, a celebrity baby without a weird name.

Celebs are just like us! Their houses go into foreclosure!

The case of missing child Adam Walsh is now officially closed (27 years later).

Rumer Willis is a hottie.

Who were the best dressed of 2008?

Angelina is looking freakishly plastic in London.

Check out Justin Bobby’s band on MySpace.

Out of the limelight and into the sunlight: Sarah Palin sunbathing.

Wacko sports traditions!

The perils of fashionable footwear.

Some really creative answers to the question, “What have you been smoking?”

Instant bug killer and other unconventional uses for your shampoo.

A cup size bigger for just $19.99?

Scarlett claws back at Lindsay.

Gag gifts for the holidays!

Plastic surgery is all the rage these days making imperfections a thing of the past.

But what happens when things go too far?

We’ve seen many a-celebrity eff up their once beautiful images at the hands of plastic surgery. For example, as CC has previously discussed, Lisa Rinna has gone just a little too far. And let’s not forget, MJ. Michael Jackson was sooo cute as the youngest member of Jackson 5. Then his skin started changing color and his nose started getting smaller and pointier.

But when us lowly civilians catch wind of the plastic surgery bug, some people take way too far.

Enter, Hang Mioku. Who you ask? Allow me to explain. Read More »

Spencer and Heidi keep talking. Burn hole in my brain.

Tom and Katie are still married…and happy.

Rhode Island mandates domestic violence education in schools.

Sarah Palin damns us all to hell. See ya there!

Lakisha Jones (from American Idol) got married…and everyone is really excited.

Leo can’t be anything but sexy.

No more sexy time for Brad and Angelina.

God, we wish we worked at airport security right about now.

Women don’t let this recession get in our way of beauty!

Justin Bobby and LC? NO WAY!

Happy (sorta) Birthday, Miley Cyrus!

Do you experience drunk-o-vision?

Amy Winehouse’s nose says, “I QUIT!”

Ashley Simpson and Pete Wentz (fashion) emergency.

Did Joe Biden have a little work done? (We knew it!)