Who didn’t grow up with Shel Silverstien poems? Most of us read him at bedtime (and by read him, I mean our mom or dad did) and even talked about him in our english classes. Although Silverstien passed away in 1999, his family is releasing a posthumous collection titled “Every Thing On It”. With the late great Shel in mind I have written you all a college/one-night-stand inspired poem to get you in the spirit. You’re welcome.

Where’s my cell phone? Where’s my keys?

Where’s my shirt? Was that guy a sleaze?

What’s this room? What was his name?

Oh yes, he’s that frat guy from Notre Dame.

Will he call me? Does he care?

Is he cuddling a teddy bear?

I have get back to my dorm,

Getting out of here has become my art form.

Was the sex pretty lame?

Who knows, who cares! It’s time for the walk of shame.

Now that broetry is taking the literary world by storm, I’ve taken it upon myself to write a broem of my own. This is broetry is its purest form, for the bros, about the bros. I give you, Ode to the Bro Style. *dims lights*

This is a broem about your (campus) style, bros. Particularly, you Sloppy Joes.
We love the clothes you wear, just not the way you wear ‘em.
It’s hard for us to say anything, ’cause then you’ll throw a tantrum.
Your shirt’s a little dingy and your pants are always saggy
Don’t think I haven’t noticed, wearing belts just makes you aggy.

You’re pretty keen on chest thumps, finger foods and bars
Yet your decision making skills are far too often below par.
I know you felt the beer dripping down your face that evening
But somehow you still missed the connection between the stained shirt and a good cleaning.
The sniff and fold the next morning seemed logical to you
After a night filled with stumbling girls and cologne that (now) smells of brew.

You love those dirty sneakers, you wear them religiously
Although you sniff em before you wear em, looking around suspiciously.
That alone should be an indication (a girl could only hope)
that perhaps they’ve reached their expiration. Time to say goodbye, bro.

We’ve got school pride just like you do, and we love our alma mater
but on your way to class, many times you dont even bother
to put on something other than that hole-y school sweatshirt,
or anything without holes in it, or chili stains, or just plain dirt.

We know you can do better, we’ve seen you do it!
But the crew neck tees and basketball shorts, we just cant deal with.
Girls like em rough around the edges, yes this is true.
But you’ve taken ‘rough’ and ‘edges’ to a whole ‘nother level, and of this we don’t approve.

Simply brushing your hair really shows us that you care.
And taking an iron to your shirt every once in a while almost brings me to tears!
See, we (sometimes) care about you, you should care about you too!
So that’s why I’m presenting these three things to you:

A Tide pen for your stains, carry it with you always
A brush for that moptop of yours, (Some grooming is always appreciated.)
And a toothbrush for those dingy kick (if you keep ‘em, at least clean ‘em!)

Good luck and goodbye to the sloppy joe style,
we’ll be seeing the new you in just a little while.

[There comes a time in every girl’s life, (usually after a third or fourth martini), when she realizes “Damn, I need to do something… travel to Europe, take up Chinese, get married…someeeething! I need to change my life.” Finding myself in one such rut and without the cash-flow for a capricious jet-set to France, I decided to live by the book, take the plunge, and tackle the Benrik challenge. If you have never heard of Benrik’s This Book Will Change Your Life, crawl out from under the rock you have been living under, wipe the tired crust from your eyes, and listen up.]

Week 4 – Task 1

Day 29- Dial a Phone Number at Random and Read this Script with a Deep South accent

The Script (or at least the part I got to read before people hung up):

You know, without Christ, without Jesus, we have no hope. Why? Well, because we know that the standard of God’s righteousness is Law, a law of the Ten Commandments, a law of Moses on Sinai, saying that this righteousness, O Israel. But you know, God also gave another law. A law revolving around a system of shedding a poor and innocent lambs blood…

The Reactions:

1) I have a lot to do right now. I don’t have time for God or Jesus!

2) Is this a recorder? Is this the voice of God? Who are you?

3) Click*

4) Click*

5) Click*

6) Click*

Week 4- Task 2

Day 161- Leave a Poem in a Public Place to Brighten up Someone’s Day

As a writer, I have always beaten myself up about perhaps not being able to make it in such a difficult field. Who am I? Who would want to read my work? However, all of this changed the day that I was asked to analyzed the poem known as an “American Masterpiece” by William Carlos Williams. This poem gave me hope that absolutely anyone could become a writer. Hell, if this counts as poetry, my grocery list does too! And so, to inspire this sense of creativity in others, I decided to share The Red Wheelbarrow in a public space.

So much depends
upon
A red wheel
barrow
Glazed with rain
water
Besides the white
chickens

I hope the poem gave confidence to some other aspiring artist as well. If William Carlos Williams can make it, anyone can!

Week 4- Task 3

Day 33- Be on the Lookout for the Paranormal

There’s an App for that! Seriously! There is an application for iPhones, Blackberrys, and Droids called Ghost Radar Classic. This app supposedly mimics traditional paranormal detectors in that it uses sensors to measure electromagnetic fields, vibrations and sounds. After detecting something “paranormal,” Ghost Radar displays colored circles on a radar screen to alert its user of abnormal activity.

Whether or not you believe in the paranormal (or a phone’s ability to detect it), know that I went into this challenge with the utmost seriousness. My boyfriend lives in an old mansion on the outskirts of town. Given the fact that the place always gave me the heebee-jeebees, I figured this would be the perfect location for the experiment. I was right. I walked around the entire house for twenty minutes with little to no activity on the radar. I was just about to give up and delete the application when I walked down the upstairs hallway. Suddenly colored circles popped up all over my screen and my phone began to make noises. It really freaked me out! I threw the phone down, ran downstairs and made my boyfriend go get it in the morning.

Needless to say, we stayed at my apartment that night.

Week 4- Task 4

Day 251- Read Your Own Palm

Information found here.

Take the Palm Reading Quiz & let us know how your future looks!

Basic Hand Type – You have good taste and you enjoy excessive indulgences. You like expensive clothes and an elegant lifestyle, but there are times when you seriously risk spending more than you earn. You have good instincts and are self-confident. You are never at a lack for affection and companionship. Try to correct minor health problems as soon as possible.

Life Line (The Quality of your Life) – You are a healthy person with a bright personality. You will have a long and wonderfully smooth lifespan, but you will put great effort into your work.

Head Line (How You Think About Life)– You’re thinking is clear and focused. You have a sense for creativity.

Head Line-Life Line Connection – Sometimes you are sensible and cautious, while other times you are foolhardy. Try to control your impulses and your changeable attitude.

Heart Line (Emotions and Situations related to Love)- You’ll never give up on your search for the perfect partner. You are a very sincere person, so its important that you find a sincere and faithful partner. You are a passionate lover. You are capable of much affection, but you switch partners often. You will have a happy marriage.

Destiny Line (Purpose in Life)- You have a special talent in an unusual field. This type of line occurs mostly among artists and scholars.

Week 4- Task 5

Day 148:  Leave a Note on Someone’s Car Windshield

 Note 1 : “I left someone in your trunk. I’ll pick him up next week if that’s okay”

Note 2: “I am the engineer who made this vehicle. The brakes aren’t very good cos I was hungover that day. Watch out.”

Note 3: “We’ve discovered your car is the one responsible for all the damage to the ozone layer; please bike to work in the future.”

Note 4: “I’m a traffic warden but today I feel lenient. Don’t do it again though.”

Happy Hanukkah, Jewesses! If you’re one of the lucky girls out there who still gets a sick present for every one of the 8 (crazy) nights, kudos to you. Bitch. If you’re like us here at CollegeCandy, you get a Starbucks gift card from your grandpa for $18 and a “what? I don’t do enough for you all year?” guilt trip from your mom.

For those of you who fall into the latter category, don’t fret; CollegeCandy’s got your back. We’re bringing you the 8 Hotties of Hanukkah, one for each glorious latke-eating day. Because at the end of the day, as your Hanukkah candles are burning low and dripping wax all over your desk, unwrapping an iPhone 4 is cool, but flipping through pictures of Jake Gyllenhaal’s six-pack, Drake’s tasty mug, Zach Braff’s adorableness, Mark Salling’s general hotness and Jason Segel’s not-so-full frontal is a gift that keeps on givin’.

We love a Jewish man with an accent (even if that man entered our hearts as a teeny, tiny little boy), which is why Daniel Radcliffe is our 6th Hottie of Hanukkah. Despite starting out as a total dork with glasses and a bowl cut, he wowed us all as he returned (and filled out) for each and every Harry Potter installment. Before long we were all putting “acceptance letter to Hogwarts” on our Hanukkah wish list and practicing our enchantment charms under our breath. But this sexy star does more than battle evil villains that look like fetuses; he also takes time out from his superstar career to write poetry under his (rather Jewy) pen name, Jacob Gershon.

That’s deep, Radcliffe, real deep.

[Click on any image to start the gallery.]

This series is meant to provide advice for getting the most out of college, rather than just getting through it. So far we've already discussed having a professor as a BFF, checking out what's going on in your college town, and now we're going to talk about extracurriculars - the ones you never thought you'd join!]

This generation of college gals are smart, savvy, and driven. Do you want to be a CEO of your own company one day? You’re probably already president of your college’s Business Leaders of Tomorrow club. Are you an up-and-coming style maven? No doubt you’re involved with your school’s Passion for Fashion group.

Yeah, being involved in career-minded clubs are definitely a must these days if you want to make connections, but what about joining a club…just for fun? It may seem difficult, especially when it’s so hard to manage school, friends, guys, a job, and elusive “me” time. However, if you take the plunge and join a club you never thought you would, a lot of things could happen.

First of all, joining a club for fun might lead you onto a completely different career path. Not that everything you do in college has to be future-oriented, but there are plenty of roads to success that don’t follow a “traditional” educational route. Have you seen Tina Fey’s awesome impersonations of Sarah Palin on SNL lately? She didn’t get a degree in Hilarity Studies to snag that gig. If you’re the “funny one” of your group of friends, or just a big comedy fan, why not stop in on a meeting of your campus’ improv group? You may discover you’re just as good at scoring laughs as Ms. Fey.

By the same token, f you’re always the one busting a move at mixers, or glue yourself to the couch whenever So You Think You Can Dance comes on, look into joining the dance troupe. And if you were always good at Spanish in high school but chose to devote your undergrad years to chem labs, maybe drop in on Foreign Language Club meetings to rediscover an old passion.

Furthermore, joining a new club will get you out of your dorm and into a new social circle. Sure, we all have our core group of friends, but do you ever feel like you’re doing the same old things all the time? If you’re looking for excitement, joining a new club just might jumpstart your social life. Most clubs will not only meet on campus but host or sponsor events in the community. Poetry or literary clubs will often hold open mics throughout the year–something to look into if you’re an inner poet or rapper who wants some exposure. Cultural clubs like Hillel or the Asian Student Union will certainly throw parties on holidays like Rosh Hashanah and Chinese New Year (plus, who doesn’t love free food?). And the pals you make from joining a new club can connect you to other fun things going on around campus you may never have heard about.

And joining a club for fun means there’s no “political” pressure to run for treasurer or president just so it looks good on your resume. You can attend meetings when you like, socialize with who you like, and get involved at your own leisure. Best of all, college is a time when you have an enormous amount of opportunities to try new things at very little cost and without expectations of following up. If you want to take a dance class after graduation it’ll cost you at least $15 a pop. So what do you have to lose? Get out there and break a leg!

[Come back to find out the next must-do on my list: Live With Strangers!]

Being a Literature student and an all around geek when it comes to anything book related, I’ve listened to my fair share of poetry readings; ranging from the well known classics to the new and upcoming talents of today.

The Internet has become my own little bookshop/library, and I often browse pages like fictionpress for creative finds and sometimes even upload my own writing. I love discovering new artists because they give me inspiration to progress with my own creative work.

When it comes to poetry reading and artistic inspiration, Myspace is slowly becoming my new haven. It was only a matter of time before poets joined the ranks of bands everywhere and began recording and uploading their own profiles. I first came across these new artists while browsing Kate Nash’s Myspace music profile (a woman who’s pretty damn cool on her own), and instantly fell in love.

The first one I listened to was Poeticat. I fell in love with her work, her words so accessible and entertaining that I instantly added her as a friend. Listening to an artist recite their own writing brings much more depth into the work itself. Listening to the rhythm, the rhyme and the words reverberating simultaneously out of the speakers is an indescribable experience. The emotions and feelings the poet attempts to deliver through their words becomes easier to understand. Life is breathed into the sentences and they became more than just ink stained writings on paper.

Dockers MC, who I also found on Kate Nash’s profile, has an outstanding grasp of words and rhythm. The way she delivers her poems mimics the fast paced style of MC/rapping, plus, it’s high in drama and humor. Both Poeticat and Dockers MC’s London accent brings a demotic and down-to-earth approach to their art, emphasising a sense of identity between the poet and their work.

Another artist I am obsessing over is George Pringle. I was first introduced to her whilst reading the Independent. She is an Oxford based poet, which shocked me at first because Oxford is my hometown and I had not heard of her before. Her poems are recited over electro-beats, which compliments the whole new-rave indie movement. Unlike Poeticat and Dockers MC, George has a much posher accent, (she is after all an SW10/Oxford lady), but it doesn’t make her any less accessible and instead emphasises a sense of variety.

These are just three artists worth taking a look at — there are loads of others out there just waiting to be found. Just keep your ears open, you’ll never know what you could hear!

Listen to recited poetry? Have any recommendations?