Lesson 30: Move On Even When There’s Nothing To Move On To

My roommate and I have spent countless nights talking (sometimes slurring) to the wee hours of the morning, discussing love and all of the messes it carries with it. Though we can’t agree on much (she’s a hopeless romantic whereas I prefer to call myself a realist) we can always agree on one thing – meeting someone new always makes it easier to move on from your ex. But by now, our mothers have nagged us enough to know that the easiest thing to do isn’t always the right thing.

It seems as though most single girls are reluctant to move on from an ex until they have another guy on the horizon thus never really allowing them to heal and find closure. Take advantage of your time between relationships to sift through any leftover emotions. While procrastinating may work for your Economics midterm, it’s not such a good idea in the dating world. If you push off dealing with your breakup, you’re more likely to get trapped in resent and overtime, without even realizing it you’ll be attached to a relationship you’re no longer a part of, which only makes moving on increasingly more difficult. Read More »

Hm. Maybe that wasn't such a great idea.

This song has been in my head for weeks, probably because perfectly describes what I’m living through. I recently broke up with my boyfriend.

Except not really.

Long-distance was not working out for us, so we tried an open relationship. When that didn’t fix anything, I ended it… two days before going to visit him for two weeks. Awkward much? I visited and we carried on like nothing had changed, promising we would start acting broken up once I left.

I’ve been home for over a month now and we still talk every day. He asked me to be his Valentine. I’m visiting over spring break, which also includes our one-year anniversary, and we’re still celebrating it. I’ve been on two dates, and each time felt like I was cheating. How could anyone call this broken up?

My situation may be especially strange, but I know many of my friends have been in similar positions. It’s hard to let go of someone, and usually that means a break up is more of a process than an event. You end things, cry, drunk dial, cry, sleep together, cry, keep sleeping together, get it together, stop sleeping together, move on. It ends up looking something like this.

And now that I’m in it, I’m confused. I know that I’m probably not going about this right, but I’m not sure what right is.

Can break up sex be right? Read More »

Rebound. It’s a common move and it’s not just for basketball. Whether we’re the ones just getting over a breakup or the new partner in our life is getting over an ex, the person intimately involved with an individual immediately post-breakup is oftentimes considered the rebound.

Everyone understands and supports the need for a little rebound action. That is, if you’re honest about what you’re seeking from the reboundees.

But there’s a gray area in rebounds I’d like to discuss:

The emotional rebound.

We all know about sexual/physical rebounds. This is when your ex does a girl you know he’s not even into after you break up. It’s when you get wasted and have some good ol’ random sex during that trip back home to collect your mind. But does the rebound always have to be physical?

Is there such thing as an emotional rebound? Can an emotional rebound be someone separate from your sexual/physical rebound? So many questions! Read More »