A few months ago, an old friend randomly texted me. We’d known each other for about eight or nine years – she was a former next door neighbor. People grow apart over time, but we’d still send each other the obligatory “are you still alive?” text every now and then. This go around, the conversation got a little serious.

We got on the topic of love…her love life and my lack thereof. She had a boyfriend that she’d been on and off with for a few years. The only “on and off” I had was my television.

“I’m having a baby girl in July,” she texted as the conversation waned.

I was mind blown. This girl who I basically grew up with was having a girl of her own?!

When I applied for my internship at The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy in D.C., I had my old friend in mind. I could’ve sent applications to the hundreds of newspapers and magazines in the DMV (D.C., Maryland, Virginia) area, but I wanted to do something that truly made a difference. Starbucks runs and fact checking could wait. Luckily, I’m working with Bedsider.org, a new online birth control support network that is informative, fun, and edgy enough to make a real difference. When I got the internship, I promised myself that I’d try to relay the Campaign’s message of prevention to my friends back home. Roughly 75 percent of my graduating class is married or they have a child. Isn’t that crazy?!

One of Bedsider’s sayings is “babies are great…when you’re ready for them.” I totally agree. My friend, as fabulous of a mother as she may be, was definitely not ready for a baby. We used to dream out loud about what we’d be when we grow up. I wanted to write and she wanted to act. I’m fortunate to be living my dream and now my friend has to put hers on hold.

I love Bedsider because of its honesty. Let’s get real…mostly everyone in our demographic is having sex or something similar to it. We young guys and girls can be pretty hard headed…no one really picks up (or reads) those sex pamphlets at the doctor anymore. Bedsider features “Real Stories” from people our age who tell us about their contraceptive preferences. There’s a nifty Method Explorer with a photo and detailed description of each birth control method, and you can filter the methods by categories like “most effective” and “do me now.” How cool is that?

Every college or high school may not be one of the top institutions for sex ed. On my campus, for example, there’s only the occasional awareness program, or my personal favorite — the condom bowl at the front desk in dormitories. Bedsider’s a great alternative if Sex Ed 101 isn’t in your course catalog and a great supplement even if it is. I really like the fact that the site is so visible in the realm of social media – I can check out their Twitter feed, receive a birth control or doctor’s appointment reminder on my Blackberry, and read Bedsider’s tumblr during my lunch break. I update blog posts and find images for Flickr Friday almost every day.

It’s a little too late for me to send my friend a link to Bedsider.org. But the recent launch is timely enough for you to send it to your friends and family!

Throughout the years, MTV has thrown some bizarre ideas for reality shows our way.  Some catch the attention of the nation while others fall through the cracks.  While watching MTV (daily) I find myself screaming at the TV, “WHAT is the point of this show??”  Entertainment value, usually.  That is if you can call watching guys pick a date based on the underwear a girl has in her drawer, entertainment. (Thanks, Room Raiders).  However, what about the shows that may have actually been created for a real reason?

Let’s rewind.  Teen Mom.  Yes, like most people, I am obsessed.  I am still trying to figure out what Catelynn has that I don’t (besides braces, a trailer, and a 1995 JCPenny homecoming dress) that makes Tyler choose HER over me.  SO unfair.  But back to my point: as I watched the finale of Teen Mom last week and gear up for tonight’s reunion episode with Dr. Drew, I’m really starting to wonder what MTV was trying to do with this show.

Was it for entertainment value? Sure, listening to Gary recite a definition of the word “empathy” during the finale was extremely entertaining, but teen pregnancy is a huge issue; is MTV trying to take a stance? Are they trying to educate teens about the horrors of teen pregnancy? Maybe trying to prevent it? You would think by airing this show, MTV could position themselves as advocates to prevent teen pregnancy and use the show as an education tool, while also providing entertainment. 

And if that was the intent, I have a couple issues with how it was seen through.

Personally, I did not find the show realistic.  Throughout the season, Farrah was the only teen mom who did not have the baby’s father in the picture.  I’m not implying that the other moms are leading ideal lives with their outstanding boyfriends, but Catelynn, Amber, and Maci all got pregnant by their boyfriend at the time.  These were guys that they were having consensual sex with regularly.  Although Gary and Ryan may go down in history as two of the worst boyfriends ever, throughout the season they are shown trying to make their relationships “work” in the best interest of their new child.

Farrah, on the other hand, although not with the father of her child, lives at home with her mother and father.   It is evident that Farrah has grown up pretty fortunately and has an extremely comfortable living situation.  The “hardships” Farrah faces include not being able to party with her friends all the time, and not being able to find a boyfriend who is ready to date a girl with a kid.  Yes these things might be difficult for her, but in the scheme of teen pregnancy they are quite trivial.  Her parents are always there to help out, and support her both emotionally and financially. The same is true for the rest of the teen moms on the show.

If MTV was trying to educate about teen pregnancy and the perils of dealing with it, why not show girls who are even less fortunate?  What about the ones out there who are really on their own?  There are plenty of girls who come from uneducated, broken families, who get pregnant and have no escape, and no chance at a better life.  Some live their whole lives on welfare and in many cases do not know who the father is.  My feeling is that MTV chose these specific moms because the typical viewer could relate to them better than a girl whose life has really been ruined by teen pregnancy.  If this is the case, then why didn’t MTV even show how truly hard raising a child as a teenager is?  There is not one clip throughout the whole season of one of the moms staying up the whole night with a crying baby, or cleaning up vomit.  I don’t want to go as far as to say that MTV “glamorized” being a teen mom, but I don’t think the show will leave any viewers thinking “Oh my god, this CANNOT happen to me, I better take precaution.”

And speaking of precaution, MTV never hit on the topic of prevention.  I don’t remember any of the girls being interviewed as to why birth control was not used during sex. Was it a one time slip-up with no condom?  Too afraid to ask their parents? No resources? These questions never surfaced throughout the season.  And furthermore, I find it extremely unrealistic to not mention abortion on the topic of teen pregnancy.  The a-word was non-existent throughout the series, but in reality, it is an option.  Most people have strong opinions on the subject, being either completely against it or for it.  But just because it would have stirred up controversy, does that mean MTV should have ignored it completely? If they wanted to use their power to educate teens and lay all the options on the table, why wasn’t it even mentioned?

So besides making me fall in love with Tyler, what was MTV’s purpose in producing this show? Do you think they portrayed teen pregnancy realistically?  Share your thoughts, peeps!

I’ve also heard girls talk about how peeing after sex could prevent STDs and pregnancy. I’m less than convinced, but could there be some truth in it? Does urine have some secret healing powers? I decided to investigate the idea of peeing after to sex to see if it really does anything…or if we’re all missing out on quality cuddles for nothing.

Most research finds that peeing after sex may reduce the possibility of contracting a Urinary Tract Infection. Peeing after sex can prevent UTIs because “it can help remove unwanted organisms from the urethra, which may reduce the risk of urethral infections.” While it’s not a guarantee, what do I really have to lose by running to the bathroom naked to clean out my urethra? I’m not a fan of any unwanted organisms in my lady-parts, so if peeing after sex will flush them out, I’m game.

So if pee can rid me of that evil bacteria, can it do the same for sperm?

No. Peeing after sex does NOT prevent STDs or pregnancy. I repeat: it does NOT prevent STDs or pregnancy. Sexetc.com explains: “The semen and penis go into the vagina and the urine comes out the urethra, which is a different opening. So, while urinating after sex might empty the bladder, it has no effect on where the sperm are inside the vagina.” It seems obvious because it is. Anyone who tells you differently is just trying to sneak by without using a condom.

For STD and pregnancy protection, condoms are ALWAYS you’re best bet. Std411.com says: “STDs cannot be flushed or washed away, so peeing and washing will not prevent a bacterial or viral STD and nor will they cause a STD to go away.”

Let’s be honest, people; if pee pee could prevent STDs, wouldn’t people have figured that out a long time ago?

So let’s break it all down:
Peeing to prevent UTIs = truth.
Peeing to prevent you from being a mom with an STD = big, fat false.

If you’re going to have sex and you want it to be the safest/cleanest/baby free-est it can be, use a condom, pee when you’re done, wash those hands, then hop back under the covers for a much-needed and much-coveted snuggle sesh.

Although nothing like the aforementioned methods are on the market yet, scientists are busily researching ways to make men more active in pregnancy prevention.

At the second annual “Future of Male Contraception” conference held in Seattle this week (seriously, they have those?) sponsors such as the National Institute of Health and World Health Organization eagerly watched as new guy-based contraception inventions were unveiled.

Some of the new developments revealed were:

• The Intra Vas Device, “a set of removable plugs [which] block sperm in the vas deferens, the tube that’s cut in a vasectomy”.

Oh, I’m sure the guys will be lining up for this little procedure! Plugging up tubes in the body doesn’t sound comfortable, either. It kinda sounds like your balls would be constipated, no? Lovely, I’m sure.

• SARM (Selective Androgen receptor modulator), a “Testosterone-like pill” recently used as a muscle-wasting treatment that may also lower sperm count.

Awesome! So basically this is going to turn your man into a testicle-less non-man? Please tell me no.

• CDB-4022, a non-hormonal pill that “prevents monkey sperm from swimming to it’s destination”.

How do you confuse sperm, by the way? And, um, you all noticed it said monkey sperm, right?

None of these products have had sufficient testing, but researchers are confidentially moving forward.

No word yet on how the male population feels about allowing muscle-wasting treatments and sperm drugging medicine to invade their weewees but at least we may not have to rely on mood ruining pills forever (or until we want to pop out a few).