The Final 4. Plus two dudes who are lucky to be there.

That’s it. I am d-u-n-z-o with Project Runway. DUNZO! I love me some Heidi Klum and I think Althea is fantastic, but I refuse to support a show that I just can’t connect to anymore. If you haven’t watched this week’s episode (and you still care what is happening in this snoozefest they call Season Six) I would stop reading now. Cuz I’m about to get angry.

Ok, it’s pretty obvious that the girls are running the show this season. The judges got rid of the only guy with talent (Ra’Mon) a long time ago and it’s pretty much been a battle of the ugly for the dudes since then. Everyone knows Althea and (Meana) Irina will be showing a final collection sometime soon.  And the third spot will most likely be goin’ to Carol Hannah (and her annoying nervous laugh).

But the guys. Oy. Let’s break it all down for ya: Read More »

I have to admit – it’s becoming somewhat painful to watch Project Runway this season and find things to write about. Unlike seasons past where designers say and do funny things beyond whipping up runway looks, all things more than worthy of writing about, this season is a whole lot of blah. And it’s impossible to write about blah.

Perhaps that’s why the producers decided to bring in Bob Mackie and Christina Aguilera last night. Maybe a little sequins would liven things up a bit?

Too bad it didn’t work. I mean, absolutely nothing about this challenge worked. The designers were instructed to take some inspiration from Mr. Mackie and go all out on a stage design for Christina Aguilera. CHRISTINA FREAKING AGUILERA. A woman known for her strong voice and her awesomely choreographed shows.

Not a woman known for living in a cave and tearing meat from dead animal carcasses with her teeth, Logan.

And not a woman who is currently retired and heading to the Assisted Living Annual Ball, Jordana.

I’d like to think that in a subconscious homage to their good friend Epperson, the designers misunderstood Tim Gunn’s assignment. Maybe they were struck dumb by all of Bob Mackie’s brilliance and instead of hearing “Christina” they heard “Junior Prom in the Midwest”? All that sparkle. All that glitz. Seriously, I walked away for a minute to grab a snack during the show and missed the part where the designers got their assignment. When I came back in and saw what everyone was picking up at Mood, I thought this was a crossover event with TLC’s Toddlers in Tiaras.

It was just bad. Almost as bad as Irina’s bitchy attitude. Almost. That girl is one big biznatch. And that ice skating costume she made? Hurl. Read More »

After the judges decided to boot Ra’mon (the most talented designer on the show) last week, I really wanted to boycott Project Runway. There is so much other great TV on Thursday nights (Ace of Cakes, The Office, Community) that I didn’t feel the need to watch the same show that had turned its back on me the week before.

Also, I was invited out to the bar for some tasty drink specials. Clearly $1 beers would trump anything, even if Ra’Mon was still around.

So I went out for some drinks…and then came home to see what shenanigans the Project Runway designers would get involved in this week. And let me say – watching the show buzzed is truly the only way to go. I was wearing beer goggles and everything was just so much better!

The challenge was to design a look for I.N.C., a Macy’s brand. The designs had to be in blue and the designers had to work in teams.

As usual, the designers had to send their models to the Garnier hair studio and the L’Oreal Paris makeup room, and to use accessories from the Macy’s accessory wall which had been stocked with I.N.C. shoes.

I don’t know about you, but it seems like maybe these companies are paying to have their brands on the show. Could it be??

Anyways, the designers worked and sewed and bitched about their teammates. Epperson and Chris had a designer love affair in the back (which clearly blinded them to what the h-e-double hockey sticks they were doing), Nikolas whined about ruffles in the front, and Irena talked. A lot. Homegirl might be a good designer, but her voice is like nails on a mother effing chalkboard. She just needs to stop. Read More »

Epperson’s model’s did. But we’ll get back to that later.

Last night’s episode of Project Runway made me realize three things:

1. When models aren’t walking the runway, they have zero sense of personal style.
2. Many of the designers on this season of PR would make great designers for Delias or Forever 21.
3. I should have had one more drink at happy hour if I really wanted to enjoy this show.

Yeah, I said it. No matter how much they try and make this season of Project Runway match those of the past, it’s really just falling flat for me. I don’t know if it’s because some of the designers are old (I don’t need to see Epperson tear up as he sews a frock) or because none of them are Christian Siriano (or even Stella!), but I find each episode more boring than the next.

I had some high hopes last night. And not only because I had some cocktails before the episode began. I really thought the challenge – dressing models for an industry event – would lead to some serious drama, both on and off the runway.

Instead, I watched as some really beautiful women explained some really God-awful ideas (“I want to look like a classy, chic, elegant…tiger.”) to the designers. I mean, really? A bright blue jump suit with gold rope? That sounds eerily similar to what I wore in my tap recital…when I was six…and we were dancing to “The Good Ship, Lollipop.”

Don’t get me wrong; some of the models had a really awesome sense of style, but it’s now clear that modeling means looking good in clothes…that other people put on you. The end. Read More »

Ever since that horrible live birth video they made us watch in sex-ed in 5th grade, I’ve been disinclined to anything baby-related. Heidi Klum may look great pregnant, but there’s nothing pretty about a giant head poking out of a screaming woman’s…yeah.

Anyway, after discovering that last night’s runway challenge was for super pregnant Rebecca Romijn, I sorta freaked out. I mean, she was really pregnant. What if she gave birth right there next to the runway?! I totally agreed with Logan when he said designing maternity clothes wasn’t really his “thing” and that babies scared him.

OMG, babies scare me too!

But I put away my fears because the smiley, lovely Rebecca Romijn from one of my favorite shows, Ugly Betty, was a guest judge. Not everyone could be as awesome a tranny as she can. I felt bad when she delivered her news, though (of the challenge, not the baby). Almost all the designers had never done maternity-wear before and they were lookin’ scared! Things were sure to be a mess. A hot, tranny mess.

I was surprised on the runway, however; most of the gowns were gorgeous! It made me almost reconsider my 5th grade vow-to-self to adopt… almost (I don’t think anything could ever wipe those terrifying birthing images from my mind). I could never tell the difference between Shirin and Irina before but now I know: Irina is cute but Shirin is cuter (which is why she won, of course). Epperson continued to create masterpieces worthy of display at the MET (a pregnant jumpsuit cannot be easy to make…or wear), and Christopher is still manly but sensitive to women’s curves.

Chris, if you ever switch back to your original team, call me.

But for the second week running, for one particular designer there was just no hope at all. This episode might as well have been titled, “Hatin’ On Mitchell.” And with good reason. All jokin’ aside, you know you’re a bad designer when: Read More »

In honor of tonight’s Project Runway return (a full 5 hours of it!), I decided to take a trip down PR memory lane. God, I have so many great memories with my Project Runway friends. Like the time I paused the TV for 4 minutes just to see what the hell Jeffrey Sebelia’s neck tat said. Or all those times I asked Andre why he constantly had to embarrass me in front of my friends at the Red Lobster.

It’s difficult to choose my favorite moments from my long term relationship with Project Runway (how can you choose when you’ve got season after season of people like Kayne, Blayne and that weirdo lady who spit on her dress?!), but here are some of the best.

Let’s just hope season six can live up to these distant memories: Read More »