Shots. Shots. Shots shots shots shots!

Let’s be honest: drinking is fun. So fun, in fact, you’re probably nursing a hangover right now so you can get the party started again in a few short hours. Everything is just so much more exciting when you’ve got a couple vodka sodas in your (carb-loaded) belly. Songs are better. Food tastes better. The weirdo guys from your Poli Sci class look better.

But somehow, no matter how much you drink, that sloppy drunk girl is still really effing annoying.

Yeah, a drunken Friday night (or Tuesday afternoon) is a wonderful thing, but there are a few downsides that come with it. This week I asked the CollegeCandy writers to weigh in on their biggest drinking pet peeves. You know you’ve got some too; share them below!

Norah – Drake University: I absolutely hate when drunk girls commandeer the iPod and play country songs all night. Your drunk singalong is nowhere near as cute as you think it is…and the rest of us just want to dance.

Brittany – University of Saint Thomas: My ability to miraculously “drunk delete” sent text messages before I am able to re-evaluate the embarrassment in the morning.  You would think it would be relieving to my ego, but there’s nothing there to explain that “What??” text from my crush in the morning. Great.

Meg – University of Delaware: My biggest drinking pet peeve are my friends who like to fight when they’re drunk. I get sick of saying “Of courrrrrrse she’s not as pretty as you are. Don’t be ridiculous!” or “Are you serious? Of course you could kick his ass! But lets go inside instead…”

Nina – Michigan State University: Three words: “I’m SOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooo drunkkkk!” No need to tell me – it’s annoyingly clear already.

Ricki – University of Michigan: The annoying girl who always tags along on your plans and NEVER brings her own alcohol

Sarabeth – University of Texas: I hate, hate, HATE it when drunk guys start arguing at parties. Last week, there was a guy arguing that if Texas should secede from the U.S. Idiot.

Emmy – Loyola University Chicago: Ugh, I hate how the more I drink, the more likely I am to accidentally hook up with some random. Oh, and how I have absurd drunk late night cravings for sushi…

Kelly – University of Iowa: Definitely when people can’t control their bodily functions when drinking. On New Year’s Eve, one guy threw up everywhere, pooped his pants, and peed on a group of sleeping people. Classy.

Erica – Kent State University: The morning after paranoia..especially when you’re waking up in an unfamiliar place or without an article of clothing.

Sara C – Fordham: I can’t stand the morning after when people try to make being hungover a contest. “Oh yeah? I’m so hungover I microwaved my ice pack because I thought it was a breakfast sandwich!” Ew. Stop. The stupidity isn’t cute the next day.

Jessica – Hofstra: Throwing my diet out the window as soon as I have one beer. Frozen mac and cheese? Yes please. BBQ chips? Yes! Nacho cheese Dorritos on a buttered roll? HELL YEAH.

Ness – Sheridan: Waking up the next morning with that “oh no, what happened??” feeling.

Samantha – UC Santa Barbara: When you pregame for nothing, i.e. when you go out and find out that all the parties suck.

Zahra – Northwestern University: I hate when people get drunk and use it as an excuse to obsess over something for the night. No, I don’t want to hear your thirteenth theory on why that hot guy didn’t call you back, thanks.

Alex – Lakehead University: I have one friend who gets so sloppy that she can’t even stand up. Most nights I end up with my arms crooked under her armpits, supporting her entire body weight by 1am.

Jessica – Delaware: The next day cleanup.  I hate walking into the living room to 1,000 half-empty beer cans, shot glasses, bottles that are 3/4 full yet the caps are nowhere to be found. And the smell. Ugh.

Charlsie – Hollins: My biggest pet peeve when it comes to drinking is the sloppy walk-through of a frat house that usually involves getting Solo cups of beer or sangria all over my shoes or shirts. I can’t even begin to count all the shirts that have been ruined because someone walked by with sangria and spilled it on me. I’ll admit though, I’ve been guilty of this too!

Lauren H – The New School: How guys seem to think that they’re really great at sex when they’re drunk when in reality it’s like getting my groove on with a wet sponge when all I really want is to sleep anyway.

We all come into college fearing that we won’t make a single friend our freshman year. So I patted myself on the back when I found a group of girlfriends that I fit in with right away. But I realized that these were new friends and could change their mind about me at any minute with no remorse, so I was always sure to be on my best behavior.

One night, we had all gone to dinner at our on-campus bar and restaurant. We were with a few older guys and they were sneaking us beer after beer, and it wasn’t long before I realized that I was three sheets (and 6 beers) to the wind. Doing my best to hold my ground and act like I wasn’t starting to feel that buffalo chicken sandwich churning in my stomach, my friends were surprised when I asked them to accompany me to the bathroom with a look of urgency in my eyes.

Three of us gathered around the tiny stall as I proceeded to barf up my entire meal and then some. They followed the standard friend protocol, holding my hair back and rubbing my back. Little did they know what they were about to witness.

I had flushed the toilet for a final time, and my friends breathed a sigh of relief, hoping the worst was over. My one friend was about to run back to the restaurant and get me a glass of water but was stopped dead in her tracks when she saw my next drunken move. Without a second thought, I had scooped my hand into the toilet bowl and begun cupping the water into my mouth. Yes, I was chugging toilet water.

They all started gagging and screaming at me to stop, but I insisted that it was OK because: “I do this all time. All my friends drink from the toilet at home!” So they let me quench my thirst right there at the porcelain toilet, cleaned me up and took me home.

The next morning, they replayed the entire scenario for me as I was a little hazy on the night’s events. I was appalled. Sadly enough, I have no idea why I said I drink toilet water all the time. To the best of my knowledge, I stick pretty religiously to the Brita and have never desired a cold glass of fresh toilet bowl water.

So on that fateful morning, I not only had to fear that my newfound friends were going to erase my number from their phonebooks, but I also had to face facts that there’s a possibility I have been drinking from the toilet while blacked-out for years now. Devastating.

Independence Day should NOT mean independence from:

(a) your good sense

(b) your panties

(c) reality

(d) all of the above

Okay, obviously the answer is (a). And if you believe that, skip the rest of this article.

But seriously, Independence Day marks our freedom as an independent United States of America, and for some reason, this has morphed into a gigantular party day.

Which, look, is fine by me. I love partying.

However, may I suggest, for your own sake, that you stop a tequila shot short of blacking out? Here are the top reasons why:

(7) Missing the festivities

I mean, if you can’t remember it, how the flip can you enjoy it? That totally sucks! Especially when you find out you managed to do #6.

(6) Ruining your chances with a hottie

Yes, the odds for this increase dramatically if you are blacked out. During such a state sometime in my sophomore year of college, I allegedly once asked a potential hook-up if he was gay. Um, yeah. That didn’t work out in my favor.

(5) Spilling sh*t on your clothes

Did you or did you not spend $$$ on those hotass shoes?! And did you or did you not just spend two hours getting ready? What the heck was the point if you’re just going to look like a sloppy, stainy drunk?

(4) Saying things you really mean but that you don’t want people to know you mean because they make you look like a jerk

You know how you think your exboyfriend who you’re now “friends” with is a total ahole? Ummm, maybe now, in front of all your mutual friends and multiple strangers, is not the best time to tell him. Ten times. At the top of your lungs.

(3) Puking the next day

Or that night. Or whenever. Puking fricking blows. No pun intended.

(2) Facebook photos.

Need I say more?

(1) Look at it this way:

New dress: $45

Enough drinks to black you the flip out: $65

Walking home the next morning with a brand new STD: Priceless.

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