Celebretard Showdown: Rachael Ray vs. Tyra Banks

Tyra.Banks.VS.2005 rachel_ray

Whenever we need to make a difficult decision, we make a list. You know, like when we were choosing our favorite cupcake bakery, when we were choosing what to spend our tax refund on, or when we weren’t sure which we loved more: our Prada backpack or our Skechers.

So when are constantly faced with the awful decision of which annoying celebrity is more grating on our nerves, we make a list. Yes, this is a decision we feel the need to make on a weekly basis. We have a lot of time on our hands.

Moving on.

This week’s showdown is between two celebs that continue to invade our lives, no matter how hard we try to avoid them: Rachael Ray and Tyra Banks. Who is makes us want to kill ourselves more? We wish we didn’t have to choose. Let’s break it down: Read More »

Candy Dish: Rachael Ray Kills More Than Just My Spirit

rachelray.jpgRachel Ray is a dog killer. I knew there was something wrong with her.

Obama’s Senate seat has been filled.

Cameron Diaz is more like us than we thought!

We’d rather wear a Georgio Armani than see one in a Speedo.

The 9 high school classmates you’re sure to see over break.

Beauty products we’d like to forget.

What were the best music videos of 2008?

Jake Gyllenhaal isn’t totes off the market just yet.

5 ways to amp up that workout.

Um, women can grow extra boobs? I couldn’t even grow the first pair…

Thank God for Friday Happy Hour

tired_baby-whew.jpgToday is Friday. Tomorrow is Saturday. That means the stock exchange is closed, which also means that the economy can’t crash for 2 whole days! Wahoo! Grab you’re your favorite snacks (fat is in!) and celebrate!

That is the best news we’ve heard all week, but that isn’t saying much after the week we’ve had:

Gay rights activists get locked out of a campus, a**holes continued to break girls’ hearts, celebs got all cocky on us, Joe Six Pack made an appearance, the presidential candidates “debated,” we had to watch Rachael Ray porn, Bubba had some transgender issues, our boyfriend posted that (PRIVATE) sex tape online, and I missed out on a fantastic opportunity to get with my campus’s most notorious man-whore.

But don’t worry; Barack Obama can make it all better! (No, that was not a political statement…that was a sexual one.)

Happy Friday, peeps.

Rachael Ray’s Supremely Awkward Corn Porn

rachaelraycorn.JPGSo there I was, surfing the web for some interesting new recipes (there are only so many things you can do with chicken and rice), when I come across the most awkward, cringe-worthy video featuring kitchen maven Rachael Ray doing dirty things to an ear of corn.

Yes, it’s true: on her show, she and a “guest” stroked some corn cobs with eerie delight. I never thought I’d have to see Rachael Ray’s man hands do anything so suggestive.

If the preview photo to the left doesn’t put you off, you can check out the video HERE.

Style Idol: Angelina Jolie is One Hot Mama

angelina_jolie706.JPG[Celebrities get paid to look good and serve as a style guide to all us common folk, and part of looking good is flaunting their totally awesome fashion sense. Each week, I will be highlighting my Style Idol of the week: a celebrity who consistently shows keen fashion sense and whose closet I would raid in a heartbeat. Of course, no celebs are immune to the occasional “what the hell were they thinking?” moment, but for the most part, these celebs look foxy and fabulous and inspire us all to do the same.]

My style idol this week is none other than Angelina Jolie. How can you not envy this woman? She does and has it all: six kids, Brad Pitt on her arm (as Rachael Ray would say, yum-o!), a U.N. Ambassador, is one of the highest paid and grossing actresses of our time, and she donates a huge chunk of her income to charity.

Oh yeah, and while doing all that, she still looks absolutely fabulous.

You can’t deny she’s one of the hottest women on the planet and she plays up her hotness with her amazing eye for pieces that highlight her jaw-dropping body and almost unbelievable beauty. And she does this even while several months pregnant with twins, or when she is going through a weird “I wear blood around my neck” phase.

Whether sporting a sexy tight leather number or a flowing maxi dress, Angelina always looks like a goddess. Read More »