When you’re little you always hear “Wait till you’re older” from piercing your ears to getting your first pair of heels to sending your very first sext. However, once you hit adolescence, it seems like you’re constantly told to “act your age” or that you’re “too old for” something. Just because you’re in college doesn’t mean you can’t bask in things from the past, K?

Here are ten things you are definitely never too old for:

1. Glitter: Although you got away with wearing glittery lip gloss and questionable glittery eye shadows as a preteen, it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a little glitz and glam now. Seriously, if Lady Gaga and Katy Perry can rock glitter on a daily basis, so can you. Not sure how to pull off glitter without looking like a five-year-old that got a little too crazy at the arts and crafts table? Add a glittery top coat to your nail polish or go for a subtle glitzy shimmer in your eyeshadow. Want to be a little over the top? Go for the gold in a metallic glittery shirt. Worst case scenario is that you look like a Claire’s employee. Best case: you look hot.

2. Pigtails: Preschoolers aren’t the only ones that can rock this look. While you probably don’t want to be known as “pigtail girl” around campus, going out with pigtails could be a fun and flirty alternative to your everyday hair. You probably had your pig tails pulled up high, so for a more-adult approach to this look that you’re never too old for — sport them lower. Also, pigtails work incredibly well when you’re working out.

3. Licking the bowl of batter: You know you did it when you were younger. Your mom baked a cake and you couldn’t keep your little hands out of the chocolately goodness. Go ahead — dip your finger in the mix. Or, just dig in with a spoon. Or don’t even cook the batter and just go after the cookie dough. You’re definitely not too old to enjoy any kind of sweets — baked or not. Go ahead, no one’s looking!

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There is no better way to remember a year than with music. Especially music that gets overplayed every hour on the radio. Those songs just take you back and no matter how many years later, you’ll always remember where you were and what you were doing when those mega hits came out.

For me, 2009 can be broken down to Miley Cyrus at football pregames, Lady Gaga at frat parties, and my best friend who cannot rest until she creates a line of people to each take a shot during the “Shots Shots Shots” chorus. There was also a bit of studying somewhere in there (which was accompanied by the Kings of Leon), and some working out (to Kelly Clarkson). And that is how I’ll always remember my year.

Now that 2009 is almost o-v-e-r, I put together a playlist of the biggest and baddest songs of 2009. This top 20 list will take you back to the days before Kanye and Taylor Swift. Before Sully landed a plane in the Hudson River. Before we lost Michael Jackson. Even before Perez Hilton got a black eye from the Black Eye Peas. (Remember that glorious day??)

Play it as you scroll through your drunken Facebook photos from the year. Play it as you get ready for that mega NYE bash. Play it in 2011 when there are all those new tween stars being overplayed on the radio and you just wanna hear a little Party In The USA, dammit.

Just play it.
Happy New Year!

Dear (See Below) Bands,

I love your music. Love, love, love. But can you maybe try to be a little less annoying? It makes it so hard to defend you when I tell my friends about my favorite artists. Actually, it makes it hard to admit to anyone that you happen to be one of them.  And I want to make them like you, really, I do. But like that friend who has a minor character flaw that now pisses you off enough that you really can’t see the good in her anymore,  I’m finding it difficult to enjoy your music knowing how annoying you are.

Here are some heart-to-heart tips from your loving (secret) admirer to be a little less annoying and a little more rock and roll.

Fall Out Boy

You always have a spot in my 6-CD player in my car. Sugar, you’ll never go down on the playlist for me if you continue to make some of the sweetest pop punk music out there. But please, Pete Wentz, I’m begging you – cut your hair, lay off the eyeliner and put on a damn shirt when you are on a magazine cover. You need to settle down – you play bass. And, um, you have a kid?

Also, Patrick, can you please enunciate your song lyrics so I can actually sing along and not just randomly open my mouth while humming the tune to look like I know what I’m singing? And what’s up with the weird syntax and bizzare punctuation in the song titles? Thnks Fr Th Confusn. I mean, e.e. Cummings was a legit poet, while you’re just… an antithesis of all semblance of reason. And grammar. My English teacher highly disapproves. Read More »

The other night, I was listening to the radio (yeah, I heard I was the last one on earth who still does this) and the DJ was discussing a new ailment claiming pretty much anyone under the age of 25. This new disease: The Hills Syndrome.

No, it’s not what you would think, not an obsession with trashy TV, trying to keep up on the latest fashions, or incestuous dating, but instead a nearly non-existent work ethic. That’s right, watching The Hills is making you a bad employee.

Initially, I scoffed at the woman’s assertions (I will give her the Spencer points though, since he has no job – unless he considers being Heidi’s boyfriend/ “manager” a full time gig.) I have been known to watch The Hills from time to time, and am still capable of holding down a job. And, for whatever points it’s worth, I’ve even commented to my friends during a Hills viewing about the amazing yet easy seeming jobs the cast snags. How the hell they manage to get them with no degrees or really any intelligence, and how they hold on to them considering the better part of their day is spent out around town, texting, partying , chatting, or twirling their hair, is beyond me. I think it is safe to assume if it wasn’t for MTV, LC and the gals would be living solely off their Laguna Beach allowances.

But I digress. After taking a moment to ponder the work ethic of early twenty-somethings such as myself, I have to admit I don’t think I have the same desire to “get my hands dirty” as say, my parents or grandparents did in their early twenties. Rather than it being a result of “The Hills” though, I think it has a little something to do with a sense of entitlement from being what I like to call, a Millennial. (Millennial is great word huh? I wish I could take credit for that little catch phrase, but it was actually a friend of mine who mentioned it.) Read More »

These days, the radio is a serious disappointment. I long for the days when the number one hit was Mariah Carey singing Vision Of Love (I’m sorry but that sh*t was QUALITY). When I listen to say…something like, “This Is Why I’m Hot”, I find myself feeling so incredibly–unhot. Instead, I feel ashamed for listening to junk. Listening to most of the todays Top 40 tunes is like eating a Big Mac.

So, I’m going to bring you MY version of the good stuff, old school style, spanning several decades. Holla!

1. She’s Got A Way and Piano Man- Billy Joel

Ok, if you really want to go there….just buy a Greatest Hits album, so worth it.

2. Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves- Cher

Yeah, Cher. And no, I’m not a gay man.

3. I Have Nothing- Whitney Houston

Whitney would MURDER any of those American Idol b*tches. Read More »

If Maxim radio host and model Diana Falzone can’t catch a break with the fellas, is there any hope for the rest of us mere Photoshop-less, fluorescently-lit plebians? Well, following that whole Spitzer thing and Glamour Magazine’s jackass blogger, Falzone has had enough–and is starting a revolution! Well, sort of.

Here’s an excerpt from her blog:

“There is only so much infidelity a person can handle before they stop believing in love. In order to keep women of the world from becoming bitter, cynical spinsters I ask that we as a gender stick together and have a weekend without men!…In fact, this Saturday March 15th. Take back your night.

Dress up for yourself, go do something for you, don’t worry about him. Let him sit on his couch playing Halo with his buddies who suffer from Peter Pan Syndrome and wonder, “I wonder what (insert your name) is doing right now?” Let men see that women are not willing to deal with their crap anymore.” Read More »

Days a Freshman: 109

Mood: totally surprised

“At first I thought I didn’t remember anything.” Sammy walked over to her desk, touching the knickknacks and papers surrounding her small laptop. “But every couple of days or so little bits of sound or a weird flash of a picture would pop up out of nowhere.”

“Your hallway bathroom is disgusting.” Rebecca pushed through Sammy’s door, droplets of water falling onto the carpet from the hot pot. “I didn’t want to touch anything.”

As soon as she closed the door, the energy must have hit her, because Rebecca stopped walking and stared at the back of Sammy’s head. “What?” she asked, letting her eyes slide over to me. “What?”

“I started telling Grace about what happened.” Sammy kept her attention on her desk, playing with a small green stapler. “I think she should know.”

“Oh.” Rebecca set the hot pot on Sammy’s puffy comforter. “Okay.”

“If it’s a big deal…” I leaned farther against the dresser, wishing I could lean myself right out of the room. “If it’s a big deal you really don’t –”

“Well, I was super wasted, so it’s not as big of a deal as you would think.” Sammy picked up the stapler and spoke to it. “Its not like I have all the gritty details. I got to the party drunk, hung out with Justin and some of his friends in the house, smoked some pot…and then I was sitting on a couch…” her voice wavered, fading in and out like a radio with bad reception. “And everyone tells me I was making out with some guy for a while…Sasha, I guess…”

Rebecca’s eyes slid over to me, but I looked away. Read More »

Wow! I stumbled upon this gorgeous little audio clip on PharmaGossip.com and OMG- this will absolutely kill you.

The long and the short of it is, This guy is about to propose to his girlfriend of 4 years, when he finds out she was caught giving some “oral dictation” to her Boss in the bathroom stall at the company Christmas Party. So, instead of breaking up with her in person, he recruits some help from a local radio show.

The result is painfully cruel- Gorgeous, I tell you.