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One of these Elle covers is not like the other

You would think in the day and age of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, there wouldn’t be a bad relationship in America.  Couples around the world would look at them together, cringe, go to church and never repeat their relationship foes.  Seriously Heidi, you go right ahead and trick Spencer Pratt into thinking you’re still on birth control over a candlelit dinner? No wonder he’s carrying around ‘good ju-ju’ stones and growing his hair out like an Ewok so you don’t have sex with him anymore.

But bad relationships exist, and bad mistakes abound.

I think the worst element of a bad relationship can come from the man or woman doing something atrocious for their significant other.  Now, this goes beyond making a scrapbook of the future babies you’re going to have, sending him a love furn, or naming his pee-pee Princess Sophia.  Those are ridonkulous, sure, but there are some things that can’t be tossed out when the relationship inevitably fails. The real offenders – the majorest of major mistakes – will stick around for the long haul to haunt you in the later life. You want to date smart? Avoid these three massive mistakes.

1. Get His Name Tattooed On Your Body
I’ve seen this happen numerous times before and I want to sincerely know what that crazy bitch was thinking as a sharp needle embroidered her boyfriend’s name into her precious skin.  Maybe I’m just jealous  (I just don’t understand how truly in love I have to be to want my boyf’s name in a heart on my chest), but seeing my ex boyfriend’s name spelled backwards in the mirror every morning? Horrific.  Get a tattoo of your favorite food on your ass cheeks. Now that is worth the ink. Read More »

Let’s face it: we all make stupid decisions. Like choosing a fifth over a review session, or bringing that guy home…who stole our iPod in the morning. That’s part of college life… and a big part of what makes it so memorable. But there are some choices that have longer lasting repercussions; things we do now that will haunt us later.

So here are the 11 things from your 20’s you will most definitely regret when you’re 40. Read More »

As a college senior, I’ve done my fair share of…er…personal research when it comes to hooking up. From that first makeout session in the corner of a very sweaty frat party to my most recent jaunts with some super fine grad students, I’ve dedicated myself to my work. And while my former naive self thought that college boys were like the punch they serve at frat parties (i.e. you never know what you’re gonna get but it’s gonna be good), what I’ve actually found is quite the contrary.

There are actually only 7 types of college hook ups.

And it doesn’t matter where you go to school or who you fraternize with, every girl on every campus will at one point (or many points, you saucy minx!) find herself in bed with one of theses:

1. The Bro:
This fellow is all brawn and no brains and secretly has watched more episodes of ‘The Hills’ than you have.  Not that I’m going to say that this is a problem, but the things he whispers in your ear the whole night make you wonder how many times he has Googled the transcripts from all of the porn movies he owns.  He gives you an awkward-fest drive home in his Tahoe while he listens to Trick Daddy and checks out his reflection in the rear view mirror to make sure his collar is still perfectly popped. You wonder where he keeps his lacrosse stick, because you want to hit yourself upside the head with it. Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can’t scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Hey there,

So. First semester last year this kid and I were kind of “what are you doing tonight” kind of friends, but I always got the feeling that he liked me. Second semester last year, I had drunken sex with him, which I felt bad about, because I had liked him and I felt like I ruined my chances. We continued hooking up that semester. At the end of the year he told me he liked me, but I didn’t take it seriously because he was drunk.

Last semester we were both abroad and didn’t talk. This semester he texted me for a few weeks trying to hang out, but I assumed that he just wanted to hook up. Then we ended up hanging out the other weekend- the first night we just talked for hours catching up and made out, he slept in my room and kissed me before he left the next morning. The next night we hung out too, and I told him I didn’t want to have sex, but otherwise it would have gone there. He told me he liked me again, but I didn’t really take it too seriously this time either because it could have been a “try to change her mind” kind of move. I awkwardly responded I liked him last year, and that I guess I still like him this year. I also told him that I don’t want to do the random hookup thing anymore.

The following week he texted me on Tuesday asking me to hang out for Thursday, which I said yes to. On Thursday, he asked me what I was doing, and told me that he was going to a party at someone’s apartment with friends. That’s it. Saturday night he told me to come pregame with him and his friends, but I had plans. He called me late that night and I didn’t answer. Read More »

To state the obvious, we as people make decisions based on their potential outcomes.  We evaluate each possible cause and effect scenario while maintaining focus on what is “right vs. wrong” according to society. (Well, when we’re sober, at least.) The concept of “doing the right thing” is ultimately what steers our actions.  In short, the decisions we make in life do not directly correspond to the things we necessarily want.  We embrace the idea of free will, but can we ever really be “free” when we are constantly restricted by our own self-limitations?

When evaluating the main driving forces of our decisions, the power of guilt seems to be a leader in the race. On a day-to-day basis, we are forced to do things out of guilt.  If our actions could hurt someone else, we opt out of doing things we may personally want just to avoid the guilt.  And of course, we are often left to feel guilty for an infinite amount of time over our regrettable actions.

In this theory, however, it is hard to determine if this “we” means “we as people” or “we as women.”  A recent study by psychological researchers in Spain indicates that women in fact, do feel more guilt than men.  Beyond the conclusion that men are from Mars and that women are from Venus, the study has proven that we are actually genetically different when it comes to this emotion.  Neuroscientist Simon Baron-Cohen writes: “The female brain is predominately hard-wired for empathy. The male brain is predominately hard-wired for understanding and building systems.”  (And yes, before you go Googling, he is related to Borat, they are cousins.  So much for credibility…) Read More »

[It's pretty obvious that the average CollegeCandy reader has some very strong opinions. Opinions that she likes to share with everyone on the site. We love a strong woman (unless she happens to be charging at us with her fists raised), so we thought we'd give her a real forum to discuss her thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. Every Friday I'll be featuring a hot topic (like socks with sandals!) and leaving it up to you, the readers, to duke it out. So, read it and get your debate on in the comments section below!]

In case you’ve been living in a hole for the past week (or, you know, busy paying attention to important world events), Heidi Montag got plastic surgery… like seriously! While we and pretty much everyone else has been clear on what we think about her new “look,” it got me thinking. One of the big things people have pointed out about Heidi’s work (aside from the sheer number of surgeries) is her age – specifically that she seems incredibly young to be having work done.

Now we’re not talking about medically necessary surgeries or reconstruction here, I’m talking the pure “make me pretty because I want it” type of thing, and I admit, I can see the appeal. While I have always been a proponent of the “love yourself the way you are” mentality, there are definitely days where I have wished I could wake up with a smaller nose or bigger boobs or a magically flat tummy – and I know I’m not alone. I was always taught that self-esteem is important, and most of us wouldn’t think twice about, say, coloring our hair or getting a gym membership to boost our self-image.

Isn’t plastic surgery just an (admittedly extreme) extension of that?  Read More »

"WHY DIDN'T I SAVE THAT?!"

Did you know that college was all about academics?

Yeah, we didn’t get that memo either. We spent more time researching easy professors, building a schedule that didn’t require waking up before noon/at all on Fridays, and playing Kings, than actually studying. And now that we’re out of school and forced to use what we “learned” in college to survive, we’re kinda regretting opting for that easy American Culture class over a much more useful economics section.

Other big regrets: getting drunk before a giant presentation on St. Patrick’s Day, skipping discussion sections to snuggle with the BF, and taking that 1-credit “blow off” that actually had two 10-page papers and a final exam. Who knew one stupid credit could wreak such havoc on your GPA?

It’s obvious that most of us have made some poor decisions in college (and I’m not talking about the time I double fisted a fifth of Captain’s and a 2-liter of Diet Coke); it’s hard to think of academics, learning and our futures when there are football games to attend and beds to sleep in. This week I asked the CollegeCandy writers to share their biggest academic regrets. Maybe you can learn from them. Maybe you can relate to them. And I know you definitely have some of your own to share. Read More »

[It's pretty obvious that the average CollegeCandy reader has some very strong opinions. Opinions that she likes to share with everyone on the site. We love a strong woman, so we thought we'd give her a real forum to discuss her thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. Every Friday I'll be featuring a hot topic (like healthcare reform!) and leaving it up to you, the readers, to duke it out. So, read it and get your debate on in the comments section below!]

There’s all kinds of advice out there about your freshman year, but more than what classes to take or how I should bring my own Solo cup to parties, the the biggest piece of advice I heard back then was “don’t get a boyfriend right away, play the field.” Of course, being the serial monogamist that I am, I didn’t listen. And got a boyf faster than most students unpacked their boxes. But now I have to wonder if I would have been better off if I had listened to those wise sages. There’s a definite up and down side to the first semester boyfriend, and I think we owe it to all the ladies getting ready to start freshman year to talk it out.

The temptation of the first semester boyfriend is almost insurmountable. You’re in a new place, surrounded by new people - new, attractive people – who don’t know about that time in high school when you slipped in chocolate pudding and had to walk around all day with a brown stain on your butt. All of a sudden you get to pick the kinds of classes you take, the activities you get involved in, the events you go to - which means your chances of meeting someone who’s really compatible with you is way higher than when you were just meeting guys who lived in the same school district as you. Read More »

When I was still in school (ugh, I get depressed just thinking about the glory days), my dad would always tell people that no one was having more fun than me. I loved the football Saturdays, the sorority date parties, the movie nights with my friends and even the late night study sessions in the library.

I had the best four years of my life on that lovely campus, but there are a few things I’d change if I had the chance. Like growing out my bangs a whole lot sooner or steering clear of those belly shirts I wore to frat parties freshman year (it was a lethal combo, let me tell you).

No matter how much we all love college, I know that everyone has that one thing they’d like to do-over. Being that we’re all heading back to campus in a few weeks (Oh wait, not me. Sigh.), I asked the CollegeCandy writers to share their do-over wish lists so no one else has to make the same mistakes we did. Because college will be the best four years of your life and you don’t want to look back with any regret. Read More »