The CC Weekly Weigh In: Academic Regrets

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"WHY DIDN'T I SAVE THAT?!"

Did you know that college was all about academics?

Yeah, we didn’t get that memo either. We spent more time researching easy professors, building a schedule that didn’t require waking up before noon/at all on Fridays, and playing Kings, than actually studying. And now that we’re out of school and forced to use what we “learned” in college to survive, we’re kinda regretting opting for that easy American Culture class over a much more useful economics section.

Other big regrets: getting drunk before a giant presentation on St. Patrick’s Day, skipping discussion sections to snuggle with the BF, and taking that 1-credit “blow off” that actually had two 10-page papers and a final exam. Who knew one stupid credit could wreak such havoc on your GPA?

It’s obvious that most of us have made some poor decisions in college (and I’m not talking about the time I double fisted a fifth of Captain’s and a 2-liter of Diet Coke); it’s hard to think of academics, learning and our futures when there are football games to attend and beds to sleep in. This week I asked the CollegeCandy writers to share their biggest academic regrets. Maybe you can learn from them. Maybe you can relate to them. And I know you definitely have some of your own to share. Read More »

Duke It Out: The First-Semester Boyfriend

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[It's pretty obvious that the average CollegeCandy reader has some very strong opinions. Opinions that she likes to share with everyone on the site. We love a strong woman, so we thought we'd give her a real forum to discuss her thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. Every Friday I'll be featuring a hot topic (like healthcare reform!) and leaving it up to you, the readers, to duke it out. So, read it and get your debate on in the comments section below!]

There’s all kinds of advice out there about your freshman year, but more than what classes to take or how I should bring my own Solo cup to parties, the the biggest piece of advice I heard back then was “don’t get a boyfriend right away, play the field.” Of course, being the serial monogamist that I am, I didn’t listen. And got a boyf faster than most students unpacked their boxes. But now I have to wonder if I would have been better off if I had listened to those wise sages. There’s a definite up and down side to the first semester boyfriend, and I think we owe it to all the ladies getting ready to start freshman year to talk it out.

The temptation of the first semester boyfriend is almost insurmountable. You’re in a new place, surrounded by new people - new, attractive people – who don’t know about that time in high school when you slipped in chocolate pudding and had to walk around all day with a brown stain on your butt. All of a sudden you get to pick the kinds of classes you take, the activities you get involved in, the events you go to - which means your chances of meeting someone who’s really compatible with you is way higher than when you were just meeting guys who lived in the same school district as you. Read More »

The CC Weekly Weigh In: We Want A Do-Over!

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When I was still in school (ugh, I get depressed just thinking about the glory days), my dad would always tell people that no one was having more fun than me. I loved the football Saturdays, the sorority date parties, the movie nights with my friends and even the late night study sessions in the library.

I had the best four years of my life on that lovely campus, but there are a few things I’d change if I had the chance. Like growing out my bangs a whole lot sooner or steering clear of those belly shirts I wore to frat parties freshman year (it was a lethal combo, let me tell you).

No matter how much we all love college, I know that everyone has that one thing they’d like to do-over. Being that we’re all heading back to campus in a few weeks (Oh wait, not me. Sigh.), I asked the CollegeCandy writers to share their do-over wish lists so no one else has to make the same mistakes we did. Because college will be the best four years of your life and you don’t want to look back with any regret. Read More »

The 11 Things You Do In Your 20’s That You’ll Regret When You’re 40

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Let’s face it: we all make stupid decisions. Like choosing a fifth over a review session, or bringing that guy home…who stole our iPod in the morning. That’s part of college life… and a big part of what makes it so memorable. But there are some choices that have longer lasting repercussions; things we do now that will haunt us later. Coed Magazine covered the 10 things guys will regret when they’re 40 and it got us thinking. They hit on a lot of biggies, but there are some things that we ladies have to worry about that weren’t included.

So here are the 11 things from your 20’s you will most definitely regret when you’re 40. Read More »

My 5 Biggest Hook Up Regrets

bathroom.jpgYom Kippur is all about reflection. So, I spent a good portion of yesterday in synagogue reflecting on things I have done over the past year in an effort to clean my slate and ask God for forgiveness. I usually try not to regret those things that I have done, but that is not always possible, especially when alcohol is involved.

1. I regret that time I met a guy at a bar and did some naughty things at a very public table. That other people may have been sitting at. And the bar also happened to be a restaurant. And it was definitely not sanitary.

2. I regret purchasing condoms while drunk and choosing that the ones that glow in the dark/have spikes “for her enjoyment.” I did not enjoy them that night, nor did I enjoy the way those spikes made me feel for the next 3 days.

3. I regret thinking hooking up in a boy’s bathroom was “hot” – it was not. In fact, it was dirty, moldy and didn’t have a lock. So, with that, I regret that guy’s roommates walking in and getting quite a show.

4. I regret hooking up in my roommate’s bed because she then hooked up in my bed in retaliation…and made a much bigger mess. Read More »

Hooking Up With Your RA: Right On, or Wrong Turn?

ra.jpgListen up incoming freshmen: in a few weeks, you’re going to find yourself on a huge college campus full of more hook-up potential than you could ever dream. In the next few years, some of you will have long-term relationships, while many of you will engage in short-term hook-ups.

There are several types of college relationships that have an urban legend-esque feel to them: the sexy school girl and the married professor, the sexy school girl and the teaching assistant, and, of course, the sexy school girl and the resident assistant.

I have never hooked up with one of my RAs, but that’s because I’ve only ever had female RA’s. Still, I know plenty of people who have dabbled in these waters. I’m not here to condone or condemn the practice, because I’ve certainly had my fair share of regrettable trysts, but I am here to lay out some of the baggage that comes with such a hook up.

First of all, consider the fact that even inter-floor mating can lead to year-long awkwardness. If you fear the inevitable walk of shame, imagine the anxiety that comes with the chance that one of your floormates sees you leaving the RA’s room in last night’s bar clothes. Even if you survive the W.O.S, you risk the rumors and reputation — people are more apt to label someone “the girl that banged the RA” than “the chick who nailed whatshisname in 5B.” Even worse, if you can’t handle the tension of a chance meeting on the elevator (or on the way to the showers), you are biting off more than you can chew with by shacking up with your RA.

Your RA is someone you will probably have to turn to throughout the year. He’ll be the one to let you into your room when you are locked out wearing only a towel. This means he also has the master key to your room (not implying anything, just saying). He’s also someone who will have to keep tabs on you throughout the year. He’ll be writing you up for dorm parties, open containers, and that hole in your wall that you forgot to fix before move-out day. This fact alone can open up a brand new can of worms in Relationship Land. Read More »

The Forbidden Bone: 5 Men Not To Sleep With

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1. YOUR FRIEND’S ROOMMATE

In this wacky age of co-ed cohabitation, it’s common to spot a likely young man in your friend’s apartment. At first, it can seem natural to make out with him. You have so much in common! For example: you both spend a lot of time in his apartment! There is nothing more erotic, for two people, than seeing each other ALL THE DAMN TIME. Am I right?

I am wrong. Face facts: you are going to stop sleeping with this guy. I don’t know what you do with people you’ve stopped sleeping with, but I, being Amish, shun them for life. It is the only way. Unfortunately, this gentleman’s proximity to your friend means that, when you call a ceasefire on the boning – or when he calls it, which can happen – you’re going to have to stay friendly.

It’s going to suck.

2. DUDE YOU MET ON CRAIGSLIST

There is only one dude you meet on Craigslist. He has many disguises – horny lawyer, horny accountant, horny ice cream truck man – but he is the same dude. He’s a magical shapeshifter!

He’s also a shady perv. Dude You Met On Craigslist thinks that a perfect date would consist of tying you to his radiator and making you watch the puppet shows he performs with human organs. Some of them would be yours.

This may seem like a radical assumption, but I’ve had my fact-checkers look into this, and they concur: that dude you met on Craigslist is creepy.

Also, they are all dead. Read More »

Is it “Better to Have Loved and Lost, Than to Have Never Loved At All”?

23481993.jpgAlfred Lord Tennyson, I wholeheartedly disagree with you.

I was 42 miles away from home on the night that I nearly killed myself.

I don’t remember what time it was; only that it was the very early morning of May 27 and that any warmth that had lingered from the daylight hours into the evening of May 26 had been driven out by the pre-sunrise chill.

I had just celebrated my 21st birthday and I was standing with a knife against my chest eight feet and two years away from the spot where the ex said, “I love you” for the first time. He was in another part of his house telling my friend probably something similar to what he’d once told me.

My life has been all about the experience, whether living them out or encouraging others to have their own — the crazier the better. Because no experience is too small, I feel a certain a sense of achievement in knowing that I have lived through this life of mine so far.

And love itself is crazy – it can potentially lead you to speak, think and act in ways that you once thought unthinkable. It can be atmospheric and humbling all at once. Depending on the type that you have, love can be your foundation or your salvation or it can emotionally and mentally cripple you.

So though I say all of that and despite the fact that I know that regret is a waste of time, even this experience junky feels some regret in remembering the ex whose love I wished I’d never known. Read More »

Life Changing Sex: The One Night Stand That Rocked

23114244.jpgTaking someone home from the bar when I was still in school was a fairly normal occurrence. Just like drinking in the bathroom while I got ready, or dance parties with my roommates before heading out to the bar, finding a man for some late night fun was always a given when going out.

The entire situation was bittersweet, really. I would put on my sexiest top of the day (which was ever-changing with a weekly run to Forever 21), smoke out my eyes, throw back a few cocktails and look for a guy to make out with in the corner. Once I set my sights on someone, I would work them until I had them hooked then toss em in a cab and go on home.

I made myself believe that it was all fun and games; that everyone needed a little action sometimes and I was just fulfilling that need. But the truth was the only thing being fulfilled was my self esteem. Finding a guy was not about having an orgasm (or trying….so hard….with some of the guys I managed to bring back), but about the high of knowing someone found me sexually attractive. That high, like most, would wear off soon after the boy of the evening left, without so much as passing me his number. Read More »

Are You Over Your Ex? The Answer Ain’t So Simple.

24037222.jpgJudging from last week’s CC poll, a lot of you feel confused about your exes.

Join the club.

I think a lot of us fear that there might be something wrong if we still have feelings for an ex, even years later.

Society tells us that we’re supposed to kick it and move on, that we should say “tough luck” if somebody dumps us, and that we should never again be tempted to kiss somebody we’ve ended a relationship with.

…For real?

Even though I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost two and a half years, and I can’t imagine any scenario in which I would break up with him, I still feel a little wishy-washy about a few of my exes. Doesn’t everybody? Sure, there are a couple I’d just as soon never talk to again, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think about them every week or two (even if it is just in passing). Read More »